I have already attained an attorney and filed for D. on Jan 11th. We have had our first court hearing to establish temporary orders. Our next court hearing is the prelimanary hearing scheduled for June 4th. So for now, I am going dark...no contact, nothing...

Are you planning to follow MB and write a Plan B letter?

I am pretty much thinking about it...

I think for my own emotional protection, I need to totally separate from him. I need to let reality really hit him and it will be brutal. I care for him and I worry about him, but I know that I can't protect him. I have to do what is right for me and the kids right now.

And right now I am trying to make the decisions that will be best for the kids.

I have contacted my lawyer today so that he may contact his lawyer. I have asked that a go-between be named for the kids' sake and that a neutral place be designated for pick ups and drop offs for the kids. I am drawing my boundaries now. I am considering possibly staying in our home for the kids' sakes. We have moved several times due to WH's employment. The last move was a year and a half ago. The children have made friends in the community. My oldest daughter was to start high school here in the fall and they are now possibly faced with moving again and leaving all of their friends behind again. The oldest daughter is very angry right now and I am not so sure if it would be right to move her again. She wants to stay here. I had thought about moving back to my own hometown, about 2 1/2 hours away from here and the kids seemed ok with it in Dec and January, but now my oldest is quite upset. Right now I am the only stability that these kids have. Their father is emotionally all over the board. He doesn't have a clear understanding of their hurt, anger and confusion. I am their rock and I want to be sure that I can give them what they need...

I feel so lost and lonely right now, but I have to stay strong for them.

I called my lawyer today...WH's lawyer sent my lawyer a letter requesting more money. As it is, I am trying hard to meet the bills and the mortgages. I have cut things in the house as drastically as I can, but WH wants even more money. He has basically abandoned me and the kids and left all his responsibilities to work and play with OW in another state. I am upset right now. I am ranting. I would like to call him up so badly and chew him out, but I won't. No contact means no contact, no matter how hard he tries to push my buttons. My lawyer is working on getting a mediator now so that I do not have to deal with him unless it is a dire emergency.

It sounds like I will be going back to court again soon...

At least I have all my documentation and can account for all my expenses. WH cannot... In addition, he's going to have a tough time in front of a judge when the judge finds out he's supporting OW and doesn't want to take care of his responsibilities here.

I know...just let my lawyer handle it... Breathe deeply.