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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1 |
I love my husband of 7 1/2 months very much, we've been together for more than 5 years. but I can't help but wonder if I've made a mistake. I work days, he works nights. on my nights off, if he comes home from work early, and i'm still awake, he freaks out and just wants to be alone. I understand, he's tired and wants to chill out after work, but we have a small 2 bedroom apt, there isn't much room for me to hide. He just gives me the cold shoulder and pretty much forces me to go to bed. and expects me to be ok and happy with him the next day. i just don't know what to do anymore, i've already pointed out the way he treats me, nothing has changed, i don't know how to deal with it all...
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9 |
This may sound trite, but counseling might be a good start. Even if he won't go, you might gain something from the sessions.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 6
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 6 |
Is your husband okay the rest of the time? Does he have a stressful job?
Having been married 16 years, I am unfortunately well acquainted with concept of giving my husband "decompression time" when he gets home. THE FOLLOWING IS NOT ADVICE - JUST AN EXAMPLE OF HOW I PERSONALLY DO IT: Before my husband gets home, I make sure the house is tidy, dinner (or a beer) is ready, and the atmosphere calm. That way, any bad vibes he brings home with him are more quickly dissipated. And if he's NOT in a bad mood, so much the better.
Of course, I'm assuming the problem is job stress. Otherwise, I agree with the above poster about getting counseling.
I hope all works out for you.
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Joined: May 2007
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 3 |
That does sound a little wierd. I might be off base, but is there more to this? Speaking from my own experience here: When he comes home you are probably in the mood to talk having been home all day (this is my wife) and the last thing he wants to do is talk. He is probably just in the mood to sit down and relax, quite down time if you will (this is me). Maybe if you both recognize this it may tend to defuse things a little, just talk about this on his day off.
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