Well it looks like we are finally on the long road to recovery.
We are now 4+ months in to NC, FWW has told me a couple of times lately that she really wants to make a go of things, I told her yesterday that I was glad I kept fighting for our marriage and didn't just give up and she said "So was she".
I am still not sure if she is back in love with me the way I would like yet, I have stopped asking her, but she does occassionally initiate hugging and kissing. We have started making plans for Christmas, we have been planning a skiing holiday for January and she has been talking about getting another dog, we already have one.
We both have the occassional bad day but all in all things are pretty good.
I am going to take a break from these boards for a while and get on with rebuilding my marriage, I will drop in once in a while if I need some advice or if I feel I can help. I wouldn't dream of giving advice, there are far more experienced people on here than me, although I can maybe offer hope to people in their hour of greatest despair.
I would like to thank everyone who has helped me along the way, the likes of ML, Lousygolfer, JMCW etc etc but in particular BigKahuna and BobPure who have been like Guardian Angels to me through all of this.
Thanks again to everyone and Good Luck to you all

I'm glad to hear your story brae.....thanks for your advice, and good luck to you!

Ron

Good stuff !

Keep being not needy while MBing and life will improve yet further mate.

All blessings !

BobP
Thanks again for all your help. I know without you and BigK I would not have reached this point.
Sorry for being a pain in the A**e sometimes, the 2x4's helped sort me out.

Brae:

Good Luck! Keep us informed!

You are an MB success story!

LG

LG.
Thanks.I just look back and am grateful that somewhere through the fog WW saw the damage she was causing to me(maybe) DD(definitely) and decided to try and do what was right. Although, we went through a false recovery WW never left home and I never had to go to Plan B, although I didn't see it at the time my situation was far better than many on here.

Glad to read this Brae!

Well my dream has finally come true

This morning MrsBrae finally uttered those immortal words "I Love You" as she left for work.

I have dreamed of that moment for 7.5 months and today it happened. I am not sure that it is the all consuming love that she once had for me yet. But I don't care right now. We are making progress and while I know we still have a long way to travel down the road of recovery and we both still have good and bad days things are improving day by day.

Just wanted to share this with everyone who helped me along the way.

God bless MB and all who sail in her.!!!!

Nice innit ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

That has come because YOU QUIT BEING NEEDY !

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Now Brae , Lady Brae will have off days and you must not be downhearted when they happen.

Keep up your plan A with loving detachment and soon enough lady Brae will be all over you like white on rice <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

All blessings kiddo. You earned this milestone.

Thanks Bob,

I know we are not out of the woods yet, we both have off days from time to time but we are doing ok.

Thanks again for all your help the Messenger conversation with you and BigK a few weeks ago really helped me see the light.

Braeworth, I am slowly reading through this long thread of yours. It seems like you and I have some similarities in regards to both our wives have lost that "spark" and want to move on.

I am now where you were in the beginning. Would I be asking too much to have you E-mail me? I'd like to know some of the steps you've taken during this process. My wife has just now agreed to try marriage counseling - even though she feels there is little chance it will save us.

My E-mail address is YIPSISTHEMAN@YAHOO.COM

I hope to hear from you.

Glad to hear things are working out for you Brae!

MW
Thanks, how are you doing?

Great Brae!

Hi Brae,

Thanks for asking. I almost hesitate to respond for fear of bursting your bubble.

Bonkers never managed to go more than six weeks of NC although I knew about them all since August as she admitted them (I think). She left my Son and me to move in with him a few days ago so I guess it's over. She asked my Son to go with her but he refuses to have anything to do with the low life who broke up his family. At least that is something positive. Since the last promise of NC, I've had more ILYs than you can shake a stick at. All bull****.

I'm at the lowest point emotionally than I have ever been in my life. I'm heartbroken, completely devastated and rarely make it through the day without bursting into tears. The ironic thing is that, despite the bad treatment I've received, I still love her with all my heart.

This feels so bad it is difficult to describe.

Sorry to rain on your parade. I am genuinely pleased for you.

MW

MW - so sorry to hear that.

Thanks BK. I sent her another Plan B letter as in my heart of hearts I would like to have her back. Now I don't know whether to live with it for a while or push the button on divorce proceedings. Probably shouldn't hijack Brae's thread and discuss it on my own?

Brae:

Congrats! Great Show!

MW:

Congrats! Great Show.

Is it Plan B time? Do you KNOW that WW moving out NOW may be the best thing that happened. I don't mean to threadjack, but her moving out may just be an A killer. OM needs to MEET all EN's. And your SON! Cool!

Sorry about the pain that you are in. It is excruciating. But it CAN be a positive turning point. Time will tell.

LG

LG:

Thanks for the encouragement. I'll move this over to my thread so we don't spoil Brae's. Maybe we can discuss there?

MW,

LG is right. This might be the best thing that could have happened. Here is why.

1. She will start to miss your boy.

2. OM now has to meet ALL Of her needs.

3. OM picking his nose at home might get under her skin. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

4. It will allow you to get on your feet emotionally and preserve the love you have for her a bit longer.

5. Given that it has been exposed and she has now officially abandoned you and your child, she will find fewer supports.

6. This puts lots of pressure on their relationship right now.

7. FINALLY, YOU get time to sit back and make some decisions about your future without having her right there focusing everything on her.

All is not lost. There have been far worse and more hopeless seeming situations on this site over the years.

Hang in there, enjoy your dedicated time with son. Grow, rest up (you don't have to meet her needs now which is soooo hard when they are in an A). And get your emotional balance again.

God Bless,

JL