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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2006
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I was thinking this morning how much has changed for me. Really the getting better part of it. MC and IC have helped and so has this site. So here are my changes.
I quit smoking cold turkey in October.
I got rid of all adult content.
I am no longer an enabler to my FWW's behavior.
I am no longer as codependent(still working on complete eradication)
I am no longer a conflict avoider.
I speak my feelings when I have them.
I don't let my FWW tell me why I am angry.
I don't let things fester anymore.
I don't doubt myself.
I know I am valuable.
I have been reading other threads and I see how others have changed.
Today it hit me how much it has changed. The FWW and I had an agrument and I didn't follow the dynamic. It was weird for her but I spoke my mind. Right wrong or indifferent.
I did it and I feel better. That is something I wouldn't have done last year at this time.
BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 675
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Frog-
Great changes, plus they sound permanent, which is even better!
Some of my changes are:
I am learning my self worth
I have learned to control my temper
I have learned to be more compassionate
I was able to finally go and make new friends
I am happier overall
I have read a lot more
I try to be positive (on the outside)
AND... I have learned to appreciate loved ones in my life
And, I must tell you this... I LOVE your sig line (the lemons one :-))
I was on a quote of the day kick, and that one made me laugh!
Sadmo
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Let's see, not to brag or anything, but I:
Quit smoking, and built a home in Oaxaca with the $$ I saved
Volunteered with the Fallujah casualties for 3 months
Started my own business
Got a promotion at work
Have maintained loving relationships with my step-children
Appreciate each and every day
Lost 20 pounds on the infidelity diet, and kept it off
Learned to enjoy keeping a nice home
Have a better attitude, very little upsets me nowdays
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Joined: Apr 2006
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OP
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LOL,
I forgot one thing.
I got a Job where I make almost double what I made last year and I love it.
BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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I was thinking this morning how much has changed for me. Really the getting better part of it. MC and IC have helped and so has this site. So here are my changes. well, I used to be mean, but now I'm SWEET! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,632
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well, I used to be mean, but now I'm SWEET! CHOKE! COUGH COUGH!!!!! Blowing coffee out my nostrills!! OK, Mel, sure........... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> All Blessings, Jerry
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Joined: Apr 2001
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
hi hunny <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
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p.s. SHADDUP,JERRY! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Feb 2005
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Give me a break Mel, I didn''t mention, big hair, aquanet, or texas anywhere in my reply..... OK. I'll shuddap. SNORT! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> All blessings, Jerry
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463
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I worked up the courage to leave my WH and gained self-respect not to take the treatment anymore! I stopped yelling at the kids and taking my anger out on them. I got a raise, and strenghten my faith in my God! I've made new healthy friends! I'm gaining my sanity more and more these days, erasing WH's POV and thinking for myself. I'm more levelheaded, and have done a great job of acting instead of reacting! I started going places I wanted to go! buying things I wanted to buy! Dressing the way I want to dress! I can tell you what I think and feel now! I'm happy, and at peace more and more these days! The rollercoaster ride isn't as steep as it once was...therefore, I bounce back quicker! And I'm learning to relax! LMAO...still have a hard time with that one most days, but I'm getting it...tonight I skipped cooking for a movie! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Frog, anything I messed? LMAO
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle
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Joined: Jan 2007
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I learned to choose to own my stuff.
H decided to own his stuff and is remorseful, embarrassed, mortified and repentent (but no longer in denial) about his affair and its effect on our M and R.
H sees me as a different person who makes it 'safe' to share himself with me.
I am in love with a man who is in love with me for the first time in our 33 years of ILYBINILWY marriage.
We're growing together, thanks to God, MC, MB and this forum.
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr.
4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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Sad,
I love yours!!!! Thank you for the kind words about my sig line. I kinda like it too.
Mel what can I say other then I think you are a sweet. Well more like one of those sour patch kid candies. They are sweet once you get past the sour exterior.(lol)
Rin, you nailed it. Learning to let go!!!!!!!!!
Ace I am happy to hear "I love you and I am in love with you!"
I wanted to see some others so I can work on some more changes.
I see some I like.
BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
oh, oh, I forgot!!! I have become more "assertive" since DIG's assertiveness training!! [she said I was not assertive enough and needed help in this department] no more timid tootsie for me, baby! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693 |
I remember when I read that. Coffee out of my nose on that one.
I could only think of bugs bunny. "She don't know me verrry wellllll, do she"
BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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