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JJ, I am not sure what this has to do with the subject at hand, but thanks for posting. I hope you feel better.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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There are some that would say that for such abominable behavior, you and your W deserve everything that you get. I'm definitely one of those. I say, that you are a human being, worthy of forgiveness and deserving of a chance to live repentant and earn forgiveness for your behavior. I also believe this - for the individual - not for the marriage.
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p.s. not that it matters a whit, because the definition does not change my point, but here is the dictionary definition of narcotic:
American Heritage Dictionary - Cite This Source nar·cot·ic (när-kŏt'ĭk) Pronunciation Key
n.
An addictive drug, such as opium, that reduces pain, alters mood and behavior, and usually induces sleep or stupor. Natural and synthetic narcotics are used in medicine to control pain.
A soothing, numbing agent or thing: "There was the blessed narcotic of bridge, at the Colony or at the home of friends" (Louis Auchincloss).
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Amen, Jo. POJA was intended to faciliate a happy, healthy, respectful marriage, not to DESTROY IT with adultery. Adultery is detructive, whether it is agreed to or not. I find it so bizzare they use Harley's POJA to achieve a swinger marriage. Its a perversion and warped use of Harley's original intent.
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Pep, have you ever seen The Ice Storm. It is the most chilling (no pun intended) movie I've ever seen and it stays with me even now.
All "swingers" should get it out on DVD and be made to watch it with their eyes propped open with matchsticks just like in Clockwork Orange. No I have not.... do you recommend it Jen? (I was away on a walk with my DH)
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and be made to watch it with their eyes propped open with matchsticks just like in Clockwork Orange. Ooooh...so THAT was the trick. I'll give it a try and see if I can watch that DVD now.
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Mel,
I meant no disrespect to you. I was just confused I guess as to why a discussion arose on this thread where you asked someone if they were on narcotics. I guess I just wondered what prompted that question.
Mel~ I probably took it personally. That is about me and not about you. I am sorry if it came across as rude.
I know it is off the topic of what this thread is about. I probably should have started a seperate thread about so as not to thread jack the discussion regarding swingers. I am currently reading the book Private Lies by Frank Pittman. In it he seems to state that there is some kind of difference between adultery and infidelity. I haven't finished the book so maybe when I do it will make more sense to me because I thought that adultery and infidelity were the same thing.
I know that in your heart you are very committed to helping anyone you can recover from alcohol or substance abuse.
Perhaps I will start a thread elsewhere regarding this subject as it is an epidemic that is sweeping our nation... and our youth.
Maybe it is Rocket Science...
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Pep, it's a very depressing but very eye-opening movie. It's set in the 70's but "obviously" from what we're reading here it still applies.
It really is a wonderful movie. By wonderful I mean it really speaks. Y'know it's weird you can say a movie is wonderful but it was the most depressing thing you've ever seen.
Yeah, Pio, matchsticks work every time.
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for reference
I HATED the Cruise/Kidman movie
Eyes Wide Shut
not only was the subject matter ugly ... I thought Kubrick was self-indulgent to the point of unwatchable tripe
but, that's just me
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Thanks for the explanation, JustJilly.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Pep, I hated Eyes Wide Shut too. I thought it was a self indulgent piece of crap. The link to The Ice Storm http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119349/
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Joan Allen is one of my favorite actors
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DH and I POJAed swinging.
It is usually done on the front porch. Every now and then we'll swing somewhere else - like the park.
We especially enjoy swinging when it is raining.
If it is too hot outside, swinging is not too much fun.
However, we really enjoy it in the spring and fall.
There is nothing like the creaking of the chains as the background noise for a nice conversation.
I think the other kind of swinging is just wrong and no amount of POJA will ever make it right.
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bwhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
PIMD
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<Snort>
Too funny Mofo ....
Ha ha Mel, I snorted first!
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**snort** <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Here's a hint, its not Mrs. Howell.
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Jo, you idjut
**** post NOT deleted by Pepperband *****
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