James,

That was incredible. How can the OM compete with that. I pray for this to have made a dent in her armor.

All the best to you.

Hi James,

Your recovery is really coming along. You truly do need to take time to just accept what good is happening and hold is as something special that G-d is giving to you, because it is.

You have a wise counselor. Is she supportive of you walk of standing for your M. I find that mind, although doesn't bash my WH too much, she clearly is about me getting healthy and moving on. She will acknowledge down the road that things could change, but her main focus is to get me to stop wanting to kill myself. And that really has stopped for a few weeks now.

I worry about this coming up continually with you SG..

You're in my prayers regularly as a result you know. Trying times, are not the times to quit trying.

Thank you for your worry. But rememember, I PROMISED Mimi to not hurt myself, and I HONOR my PROMISES.

Now, to I not get down, NO. But I just know that G-d is there with me.

I am off to see WH and bring him those CD's that I bought him awhile back and to ask him to come to the apt to work on the car.

Good stuff SG.. let us know how it goes.

Alright everyone.. another work week in the books.

I'm now engaging in SELF CARE WEEKEND Part Deux!!!

Probably won't be around too terribly much... don't make too much of a mess in here on the thread while I'm out.

My prayers with you all.. may God watch over every one of us and give us many LV's this weekend!!!

To Him goes the glory!

Hey Jamesus,

I put in my thread how it went. Actually it went unbelievable. I am still shaking my head.

How are you doing today?

J and SG... on April 13, 2006 my brother took his life. I knew he was strugglin' with depression, because his wife was having an affair and was taking their two small kids to live way far away from him. Now before this happened I was going through some depression too. A few days before he hung himself in his basement we talked on the phone. I made him promise me he wouldn't do it. I told him to please think about everyone else who loved him. He was in too much pain and could not. Now before anyone jumps in and says suicide is selfish- DON'T bother because I won't argue about it. I know the feeling of not wanting to go on... to feel like everyone would be better off with you gone, etc. I felt like this during the summer just before WH came home for his "try."

You know how they say everything happens for a reason. Well I now know I would NOT kill myself, but my brothers death can't possibly "have been for a reason." I hated his wife and blamed her... during the summer I forgave her and decided to focus my hate on someone else... the "wort hog" my WH was/is with.

We all need to take care of ourselves! So we don't slide so deep or become so impulsive. I would NOT do that to my children, have I thought about it, yes... but never tried it.

You are both (J and SG) in such good places with your walk with God. I soooo wish I could get back there. We (me and the kids-WH never went with us) stopped going to church about three years ago... life went downhill. I look at my sig after I post and ask myself "why would I want him back? after three move-outs"... perhaps because I've never been one to believe in divorce and remarriage... I've told myself that he can divorce me, but I won't divorce him... I've said to myself that in my heart I will always remain married to him, but I don't know if my sinful human being can do that. I need Gods help and I need some of your prayers ;-)

Sorry for the t/j

No need to apologize SS.. you are in my prayers for sure.

We're here for you too if you need to vent. I'll pray especially for God to touch you and remind you that you are beloved among His children. Your standing for your marriage and your covenant with your husband and God is a blessing and a dedication that God will not forget, nor will He turn His back on you.

LV already this weekend.

I can't go into details but I received confirmation last night that WB's family is -definitely- not happy with WW or the situation these days. Not 100% sure on what's going on, but I DO know that much.

Not fair (about not sharing)! Good news though. You know James, every time I click on your thread I keep expecting to read about a "huge" breakthrough. I see it coming, but perhaps it's not going to be huge, but rather one step (or pebble) at a time.

Nice to hear of a LV this weekend.

probably should not speculate but have to wonder if the little guy could be saying he has has the best daddy in the world.

just my take of course.

stay strong.

I probably should know this by now... but... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> what is a "LV"?

I hope I am correct but James used this acronym for 'little victory' in past posts.

btw PM - i am down the road in Richardson.

Ok, thanks on the LV thingie...

TJ/ Richardson, wow, that's just 5 minutes away (at 70 mph down Central). My daughter lives there. I wonder how many other MBers are in our neck of the woods.

Sorry about the TJ James...
/TJ

TJ away you guys..

I know it's not fair to share.. but there isn't much I can really say. I didn't get any 'details' on what the problems were, only that there WERE problems that CoWorker and her husband would very much like to get with me to talk about 'after all this is over' because they don't want whatever it is they're going to say to me to get back to WW.

Not sure what all that means folks.. but it's pretty clear that things are not happy at He11house.

I spent a good portion of last night in high speed wobbles over what it might be about, but to be honest.. it's not going to do me a bit of good to speculate.

I'm going to continue on as I have been.. they know that I want her to come home still, and that I had hoped in the beginning for their help.. I have no expectations that things are going to change dramatically. I will simply continue to pray for God to send His Spirit to work on the other side of the mountain.

Be very careful here b/c up till now their loyalty has been with WW and WB. They don't exactly have a reputation for integrity.

"After all this is over"... interesting phrasing on their part.

Oh I plan to be careful..

The conversation was about 10 minutes long.. and believe me, I got the impression that they've about had enough of WW.

I really don't want to go into too many details.. but also DSD's grandparents are in town and on their way over here in a few.

They went to DSD's performance last night and said she did really well.. they are NOT AT ALL impressed by WB either.. matter of fact WW didn't even introduce them.. DSD's grandfather talked to him at least a little but grandma didn't say a word.

They're trying to arrange a get together with WW and the kids tomorrow I guess.

DSD's grandmother gets the impression that WB is calling the shots.. which others have had that impression as well but haven't had much in the way of interaction as DSD's grandparents had last night..

I'm going to keep praying.. we'll see what happens. Keep me in your prayers guys.. things are moving around a bit.. not sure if they're improving or not.. but I'm going to be Still, be Steady, and be with God.

My hands are together and I am looking up.

Keep us posted when you can.

Hey, James.

Just got caught up again. I am glad something seems to be happening, but I am even happier you are not setting yourself up again.

Stay strong..you are doing great!

Not too much to report in addition to all the other whirlwind weekend events.

Self Care Weekend Part Deux is complete, and honestly not quite as satisfying as the origonal. After the Friday conversation with WB's mom and stepdad I spent a lot of time thinking about WW and the situation. I spent a lot of time 'reading into things' when I really just needed to let it go. I think I'm getting there.. but to be honest it keeps bouncing around my head.

Truth is she's still firmly entrenched in her relationship with WB, and knowing her as I do the circumstances will likely cause her to cling harder to try and hang on to him.. because well.. she's given up everyone else that can help her through this.

Got up early on Sunday and went to Mass with DSD's grandparents, then we all met up with my mom for breakfast afterwards. DSD's grandparents are very supportive of my stand, and were supposed to see DSD, WW, and DS at least yesterday afternoon. Haven't heard back from them to see how it went, but I'm hoping things went well and they got to spend some time with DSD.

WW is using the excuse that her lawyer has advised her not to let the kids go with anyone when it's her 'day' to be with them. Personally I think it's a load of crap that the kids' own grandparents can't have a few hours alone with their grandchild and godchild... but that's how it is apparently.

I'll try giving them a call this afternoon and find out how things went.

Not sure how to proceed at this point other than to keep doing what I have been doing, showing a consistency of goodness, being loving and supportive to the extent that I can, and looking out first and foremost for myself and my kids.

WW's got a long way to come I think before any real breakthroughs happen.

I'm trusting in God for the outcome, and going about the business of being the best man I can for Him, for me, and for my kids.