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SIHW #1959736 11/02/07 11:51 AM
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yeah, the story was much better.

I think the one you are thinking about is From a Buick 8. I had started reading that again recently before the whirlwind of exposure. I forgot that they were making a movie from that novel. GOOD one.

I wish they'd do Eyes of the Dragon, The Talisman, Black House & a couple of others. And remake The Stand-too much left out.


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
princessmeggy #1959737 11/02/07 11:52 AM
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A TRO.


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
Dancing_Machine #1959738 11/02/07 11:59 AM
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Glad to hear that, Charlotte. Be sure to listen to princessmeggy on this one. She's in your state and I am not. Courts can handle it differently in each state, I just want to make sure you are taken care of.

I haven't been and it's because I wasn't fast enough to get that protection in place. I was trusting that WH would not leave me and DDs destitute....I was wrong and I'm still paying for it.

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yeah, the story was much better.

I think the one you are thinking about is From a Buick 8. I had started reading that again recently before the whirlwind of exposure. I forgot that they were making a movie from that novel. GOOD one.

I wish they'd do Eyes of the Dragon, The Talisman, Black House & a couple of others. And remake The Stand-too much left out.

AAAH - another Stephen King fan. I also loved Eyes of the Dragon. Discovered it after reading his more recent ones.

Following your thread is so therapeutic for me. I'm living through your success what I failed at. Applause, applause.

Bellevue #1959740 11/02/07 12:11 PM
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I was thinking it might have been like a godzilla 2 or something but I read the director wanted to give america it's own monster so it's something new.....I am a monster movie person more than a suspese person....not many good monster movies lately tho......I am legend looks good tho.

Have you read the eragon series....oh I loved eldest....the third book is coming out soon....I started reading dean [censored]'s twilight and didn't get past the first chapter...scared the bejjeeesis out of me....I know I am a wuss.

My favorite author is Wilbur smith I love his egyptian series...couldn't put it down.

SIHW #1959741 11/02/07 12:28 PM
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PLAN B AND HOW AFFAIRS SHOULD END.
Everyone, I'm thinking ahead for Charlotte, our heroine.

Her H might cave pretty soon. Let's talk to her about the No Contact Letter and terms for his surrender, ie how will she allow him back into the house.

Without No Contact and other negotiations, he could just come home and pick up where he left off - feeling put upon and not sure he wants to "forgive" Charlotte22 for her bad badness.

Yes Charlotte, you have a lot to deal with right now. Just because you got a lawyer and have protected yourself does not mean the marriage is over. It is possible your H will start trying to reconcile. You are in the power seat. He left home, his affair is exposed, and the [email]sh@t[/email] is hitting the fan.

Experts, let's not let Charlotte down at this critical phase in her marriage recovery.

SIHW #1959742 11/02/07 12:31 PM
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Have you read Dean Koontz Frankenstein series? It's set in modern New Orleans (pre-Katrina) with both the monster and the Dr. still alive. It combines a serial killer mystery into the mix. The first one is titled "Prodigal Son".


johnstwin-

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther

Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!

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I tried calling home and your cell last night. We have things to discuss. First and formost, i'm not your enemy, I am and always will be your friend. I'm not sure when Ill be back, maybe this weekend or close to it. I'm taking time, roaming about (similar to when you went to louisiana) but you're going to have to becareful with writing checks with the bank balance so low. Hope you are holding up okay. H

I had just gotten done listening to his VM with much the same message.


I also ended up talking to him on the phone because someone, a family friend whose staying here for a while, handed it to me and I didn't know it rang because I just walked in the door. I would have told them not to answer. As it was I was put on the spot. I guess I screwed up, huh?

Last edited by Charlotte22; 11/02/07 12:53 PM.

Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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I guess I screwed up, huh?


How do you think you screwed up? By talking on the phone with him?

What was his demeanor on the phone?

Be careful.....

The waywards play head games.

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Have you read Dean Koontz Frankenstein series? It's set in modern New Orleans (pre-Katrina) with both the monster and the Dr. still alive. It combines a serial killer mystery into the mix. The first one is titled "Prodigal Son".

They are great books but he has yet to release book 3. It is a year over due and no word on when it will come out.


Testosterone boys! Testosterone! It ain’t just for nose, ear and back hair anymore!
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What did he say on the phone, Charlotte? Where is he at? You didn't do anything wrong talking to him.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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He was very calm and not at all angry. Even about the bank balance, which I thought he'd be furious about. I told him I had to take it out because I didn't know how much more he was going to take out of there so I took it.

He sounded...well, kinda down, but not too far. He sounded like he might have taken something, though. So I'm not sure how much stock to put in him sounding down. Maybe he took something so he could talk to me. I don't know. I'd like to believe it's because of other reasons, but I don't know. Still a little shaky here, but okay mentally. I kept my voice calm and even.

He did not mention anything about what has transpired over the last few days and I did not mention the D. I didn't feel it was a good idea to do that over the phone.


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
Dancing_Machine #1959748 11/02/07 01:05 PM
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He may feel differently when he hears from his sons. But that is not a big concern to me. He deserves whatever they are going to tell him.


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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First and formost, i'm not your enemy, I am and always will be your friend.

Straight out of the WS handbook. But this is good that he's opening the lines of communications, you just may get your chance to Plan A him (have you read up on that by the way?). Listen to some of the others here about what to do now... I've never done any of the plans but they have. I'll help you out on the legal stuff as much as I can.

You go girl.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Charlotte, what did yall talk about?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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[quote]First and formost, i'm not your enemy, I am and always will be your friend.


Yeah, the 2nd part of this is straight out of Star Trek II-The Wrath of Kahn...Spock to Kirk when he went into the chamber to save the ship at his peril.

Quote
Straight out of the WS handbook. But this is good that he's opening the lines of communications, you just may get your chance to Plan A him (have you read up on that by the way?). Listen to some of the others here about what to do now... I've never done any of the plans but they have. I'll help you out on the legal stuff as much as I can.

You go girl.

Thanks princess meggy. I'm glad to hear that. Because I'm like, yeah, great. A friend. (of course that is not a bad thing but not what I'm aiming for now.)

Yeah, I'm going to need a looot of advice before he shows up! And I can't find my SAA book. I hid it from him & now can't find it.

I was really surprised that he was so calm, even though he may have taken something. And it was not strained or anything. From either of us. It was more natural, like it used to be. I was talking to him with no expectations (that HE knew of!)


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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Hi Melody,

The bank account. eBay, some things he had posted had sold & he needed to ship them.

He said he was roaming around like I did when I went to Louisiana (near the beginning of this nightmare) and thinking.

I told him to be careful out there and I'd see him this weekend.

Maybe when he discovered I took nearly all of the money out he decided I meant business, that I really meant business, no foolin'.

Last edited by Charlotte22; 11/02/07 01:30 PM.

Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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This does give me hope, though, because I thought that he was going to be so angry that he would just never talk to me again (especially since he was so mad at DS21 for a long time...he has NEVER been mad at DS21 like this. Of course that was when he basically dumped everyone because it was near the beginning of the A.), and when he was served, maybe countersue, or maybe just agree to everything because he wanted to get rid of me.


Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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He was persistent about calling, I'll give him that. He didn't just call once. He called the cell, he said he sent an email in the VM, he called here...gee, I haven't had this many calls from him all at once in months. I'll have to remember to see if he called the house later. Since he couldn't leave a message he may not have.

I know I can't count on anything but I do feel a lot better.

The main thing I'm worried about it how to handle the D situation, how to bring it up and try not to react to whatever he says, no matter what it is.

I wonder if he expected angry wife? Contrite little wife begging him to come home?

He also used the word "home" instead of "the house" which has been his choice for a while. Not that there's anything wrong with "the house" but "home" is...well...home. You all know what I mean.

Last edited by Charlotte22; 11/02/07 02:11 PM.

Charlotte22

BS-42
WH-Mr. Gray-52
M-15.5y
DS*DIL-26, DGS-1
DS*DIL-22
DD-21
Dday: 6/27/07 (Plan A-sort of)
10/30-BRAVE NEW WORLD! Exposure!
11/1-Filed D
11/21-Temp hearing, Shiny takes all
12/15-Plan B
5/13/08-Spousal support extended, my Shiny
Attorney totally ROCKS!!
7/17-Court again, Shiny rules!
7/22-OWH temp hearing, Shiny kicks butt again!
12/11-Mediation; Gray won't budge, we are now headed for trial

Shiny="A Dynamic Force of Epic Proportions"

Shiny WILL win!! No doubt, Sugah!
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Sounds very good. Now, don't be afraid to talk to him if he is being calm. The only reason I advised against it was because I wanted him to cool off a bit, and also talk to you NOT in the presence of the OW.

It would be best if you do see and talk to him if he isn't in a rage. There is no need to argue or blame. You can explain that your desire is to save the marriage, and for that to happen, he needs to unload the OW.

If he starts complaining about the past and all the stuff you didn't do, then you just tell him you are sorry for your part and would like a chance to change and have a good marriage, but nothing can be done with THREE people in the marriage.

Then if he says it has nothing to do with her, let him know that you would like the chance for a better marriage, but she needs to be GONE.

If he says she is his soulmate and he can't live without her and you are a boring old hag, you just tell him that you are sorry that he feels that way and will welcome the chance to work on things when he DUMPS her.

Get it? You stay calm and cheerful and sympathetic, but insistent that OW needs to go.

Don't criticize or threaten.

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