Goodness you are funny Charlotte. Your husband is a [censored].

Thanks, Big K!! You made me laugh with that one!

And you are SO right!!

You just busted on out there with dumb*ss!!

ROFLMAO!!! (at least for a little while!)

There are going to be days where you will you'll just feel down. It's a rollercoaster but everyone here thinks you're in a very good spot. Based from what I've read your H is getting towards the end IMHO. He's still holding on for dear life but almost all the shady cover he had has been stripped away. Not much left to cover the A up. Keep up your great work.

Wish my WxGF was even talking to me.

Thank you, 411!

I have seen little glimpses of Jonesy.

And he did like the poem I wrote for him last night.

I guess the big, overwhelming business of the hearing is just getting me down.

Just as well. I don't want to be all chipmunk peppy on that morning. I am probably going to throw up.

I'll be lucky if I even sleep tomorrow night, I guess.

giving others support helps me feel better and gives me strength. Granted, I'm too much of a giver, but here giving support is a great thing.

Yeah legal matters really make things difficult and nerve racking.

I'm contemplating writing a legal demand letter to my WxGF but I've been wrestling with the decision for 1 1/2 weeks. Oh well might as well go 2 or more!

He's peeking through and the OW is getting crazier which means she's holding on for dear life.

Property of inverse force. When you spin something that is tightly wound it tends to fly farther away. Your H is doing the discus and she's about to be jettisoned far far away.

Ahhhhh...I love that vision, 411!

You're a great giver!!

I can't wait to see it, even if I only hear about it...

Me to H: Come on, Jonesy!! You can fight off Mr. Gray!! Remember: I Duddits!!!

Oh yeah, nearly forgot.

I wrote H an email a little while ago thanking him for taking care of our account and inquiring about his health and that I hope he is eating right and taking care of himself.

He is SO bad about junk food when I don't feed him.

I don't expect to hear from him tonight and likely won't tomorrow, either.

I'm sure he's still trying to digest the amount of money my lawyer is going to request for spousal support.

It equals out to about one of his paychecks a month. Gee, that'd be more money than I've had to take care of bills since I don't know when!

Hey Charlotte!

Remember, when you talk with your H, keep saying "I don't want a divorce"...

Right now, you're the "Good Cop" and your lawyer is the "Bad Cop"... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Semper Fi,

RIF

Hi RIF!

That's a good analogy. I didn't think of it in the GC/BC terms before.

How 'bout Good Terminator/Bad Terminator? Returned from the future to fight infidelity for the good of man & womankind and save H from a fate worse than death....

I get to be Arnold!! Hasta la vista, Baby!!!

Hey Charlotte,

"Terminator" sounds great!!! As long as you're talking about just terminating the A and not the OW! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Seriously, you're doing great!

I hope you're getting some rest tonight...

Semper Fi,

RIF

Thanks RIF! I did get a little bit of rest.

Yes, terminate the A and OW's reputation. But she terminated her OWN reputation. She slept with a married man.

And the A is now mortally wounded...struggling along bleeding profusely from many, many wounds...

It's lifeblood is almost drained away. Soon now. Very soon... It will end.

Well, not a peep from H. I guess he's still p.o.'ed about spousal support. Way too much for him, I'm sure. But I have the house to take care of. Taxes, repairs, I need new tires, the A/C needs to be fixed in my vehicle...etc.

I'm not going to hold my breath that I'm going to hear from him at all today. Will I hope? Yes. But I'm going to try my best not to think about it.

I did a bit of shopping yesterday. I saw the cutest pair of ankle boots...so I picked them up. After hemming and hawing at the register for a bit I said the heck with it, I'm buying them. So much of our money has been wasted on that trollop I can have something nice sometimes.

I also got some new lipstick that H would LOVE, nail polish and some hair adornments. Yeah, I know, lot's of girly-girly stuff for a Terminator!

Still have to get some documents gathered for my lawyer. I told him I'd drive them over.

So that's the Tuesday morning report. I have also been thinking about when to go into Plan B.

Plan A-ing = taking care of yourself. girly-girl stuff can be considered part of your weapons cache ..........

Hi Bellevue!!

You're right.

I didn't see it that way... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Charlotte,

Assuming one of your H's top ENs is an attractive spouse, as is the case with MOST men, making yourself drop-dead gorgeous is a powerful weapon.

Pursuing the analogy of the terminator here briefly...

Part of what made the terminator such a powerful weapon, according to the movie, was that it LOOKED like something that was attractive, that is, a person, though it was really designed to kill people. So people felt safe around it, allowed it into their hiding places and once inside, it was able to destroy those very same people.

As it applies to your situation...

By being as attractive as possible physically, it will cause your H to be less attentive to defending himself and by so doing allow you into his life in ways that he doesn't even expect. This gives you an opportunity for you to do serious Plan A stuff, not least of which is simply "lookin' good." Make him slobber all over himself when he's with you and it makes OW less attractive all together. When Plan B starts, it gives him a memory of you he will dwell on often.

Of course you also have to balance that with guarding your own heart and mind to shut down attention from other men who will also find you irresistible. When your own ENs are not getting met you are especially vulnerable...Just a warning that goes along with being a hottie...Protect your boundaries while trying to break down his misplaced boundaries.

Mark

Hi Mark,

Thank you for the great advice! I wasn't even thinking about the "blending in" of the Terminators...I was just thinking about the BANG POW ANNIHILATE KA-BOOM!

Thanks for bringing that part up.

You're right about H. And Mel says I'm WAAAAAAAAYY more beautiful than the skank. I have to agree. Of course, her actions make her even uglier to me.

I'm going to wear a dress that H & I shopped for together, with matching shoes that took FOREVER to find but H was determined that day. It's a gorgeous royal blue. I will look like a Real Lady. (Who'd a thunk it? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />)

The last couple of times we were actually together and talking in person I could feel that *SPARK* which was part of what brought us together...I know he felt it too. I could see it.

I wasn't imagining things. Nope.

I've been listening to a favorite song lately that I haven't listened to in years. The chorus is:

"The world weighs on my shoulders,
But what I'm I to do?
You sometimes drive me crazy,
But I worry about you.

I know it makes no difference,
To what you're going through
But I see the tip of the iceberg
And I worry about you."

Yep, very apt. The whole song, actually.

I have to share this before I forget about it because it is funny, although it wasn't at the time.

Last night I was thinking about this incident that happened with H.

One day H came home from work. He had a stomach ache and I told him to please close the bathroom door because the rest of the house was becoming inundated. It was way worse for me because after the affair started for some reason my sense of smell became super acute. I could smell the rubber from car tires when they drove by on the road and all sorts of other things that were driving me nuts.

There were a few times when H came home and I could smell perfume. Of course he had a BS excuse like, "Someone sprayed a lot of cologne and I had to go and walk right through it...blah, blah, blah."

So comes stomach ache day. I asked him to close the door, etc. Well, later on he was talking to OW and he's telling her that I was complaining that I smelled her perfume and it was bothering me.

And the whole time it was the scent of his scat!

Kinda puts things into perspective.

Not long after I stopped smelling perfume so I guess she stopped wearing it. Of course, I held my breath when doing laundry because I didn't want to smell anything anyway so I'm not altogether sure about whether she stopped wearing it or not. UGH!

I also stayed away from him after work until he changed so I wouldn't smell it on him if it was there. UGH!

It's somehow poetic that her perfume could be confused with foul bathroom stench.

Ain't it, though? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Gives new meaning to "eau de toilette". <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />