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I agree Rif. Having Mel save them is an excellent idea. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Mel.....that was so kind of you to be the intermediary for Charlotte. I couldn't think of anyone better. I'll bet you'll have Mr. Gray straightened up in no time. He won't have a chance! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Husband was unfaithful to me before and after our marriage, at least 7 times. I found out 13 yrs into the marriage. Trickle truth for an entire year. Several different d-days, so it was more like a d-year. Difficult recovery.
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Still quiet here. But I don't anticipate anything from him, though I may fervently with for it at times.
I'm sure the fireworks will start tomorrow with my Doberman, though. I can only imagine what kind of babble Mr. Gray will be spouting to try and get to me.
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Hey Charlotte! I've signed off of my night-shift jobs and I just wanted to tell you that you're doing great!!! I'll check back in with you when I get home... to TEXAS!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> Stay very dark... let Mel and your Doberman handle Mr. Gray for now... You just take care of yourself and don't give him another thought!!! Semper Fi, RIF
Me, BS
Her, Forgiven
Married Dec 86
Multiple A's that ended '90
Rebuilding In Faith since then...
Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!
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It is hard to predict how they will respond to Plan B, Charlotte. I think it depends on how controlling they are. My ex came right over and stood outside knocking on the door for several hours, begging me to let him in to "talk". But then I heard NOTHING for 4 months, when he called me at work to announce he was in the process of moving back in.
The best thing for you is to stay dark, and not think about him. Get busy making your life better. I started exercising, cleaned the house spotless, redecorated, organized, detailed the car, made a garden, started a business, did volunteer work, and let all my friends know that I wanted to go out - ANYWHERE. That helped my self-esteem, which was in the toilet.
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Thanks RIF and believer, I know ya'll are right. I'll be whining about it until the crap hits the fan with my Doberman and I get accused of anonymous calls again or something. Then I will be very, very happy and thankful that I am in B. I'll get there...eventually!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
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C22
So proud of you girl!!!
In terms of how WHs respond to Plan B--mine went dark for almost a month. Then I got letters and emails once a week for 10 weeks. He also sent a birthday card to me in Spetember, the doggies birthday presents in October and last week I got a gift magazine subscription from him (assuming its for Christmas??) I am expecting Christmas gifts for the dogs anyday now. LOL!!!
Silly wayward...
You'll do great in Plan B. You've just enough spunk to get through fine!
Smartie
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Plan B feels very uncomfortable at first. No interaction at all seems wrong. And it feels like you are just letting the WS do whatever they want, and they are glad to be rid of you.
Also, posting is hard after all the drama. Afterall, NOTHING happens, day after day.
But have faith that Plan B is usually the thing that brings them back home.
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Plan B feels very uncomfortable at first. No interaction at all seems wrong. And it feels like you are just letting the WS do whatever they want, and they are glad to be rid of you.
Also, posting is hard after all the drama. Afterall, NOTHING happens, day after day.
But have faith that Plan B is usually the thing that brings them back home. Thanks believer!! I'm hangin' in and havin' faith! (well, I'm working on it! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> ) My sister just totally doesn't understand what I'm doing, even though I tried to explain it, sent her the link to MB and to my thread. The other day she was all: what about the 3%? I was like... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I told her I gave Mr. Gray the PBL yesterday...still, she was in "Duh" mode. So I give up. I'm not going to bother talking to her about it. I don't need any Negative Nellies! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
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Well,
I'm going to a Christmas party with my mom in a little while. Post office folks. No booze allowed. No weapons, either...don't want anyone "going postal" LOL!
If they start talkin' shop, I'm outta there! I'll hitchhike home, dangit!!
I guess I'd better bring along a book to read!
Maybe they'll have Pictionary or something...that would be fun!! Haven't played that in a while.
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Charlotte - Good job on getting out, even if it is only a Post Office parties.
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There were a ton of people there. It was at the home of one of Mom's coworkers. Really nice digs!
Yum yum food! There was even paella!!!!
And sushi, and I actually ate some! And then I ate some more! I liked it!! A lot! I surprised myself!
It wasn't really that hoppin' but it was fun to be away from the house and amongst lots of people. More new people!!
Yay!
There was one of those gift-giving games and we played one round of Bingo. Then the kids started fighting over the bingo balls and who's turn it was to call so that was the end of that!!
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Well, Mr. Gray updated his blog today. I know I'm not supposed to look but it was suggested that I check-in, just to see what he would say.
And you know what? It didn't even bother me!
It bothered the heck out of my DIL, though!!
He can go ahead and try to get to me all he wants...my Doberman takes good care of me.
Now Mel is on the other end so I'm surrounded by warriors!!!
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char, i have been reading your post everyday and by golly you are one strong woman. makes me wish i was in Texas <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> i no like Mr. Gay (i love that movie) keep up the strength and you will help make us that are not so strong to become a rock.
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lurking. encouragement from L.A.
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Well, Mr. Gray updated his blog today. I know I'm not supposed to look but it was suggested that I check-in, just to see what he would say. Charlotte, I read his blog too (I was soooo tempted to post to him but restrained. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />) He's spewing fog as predicted. "Poor, poor me." I'd bet dollars to donuts he KNOWS you're reading and he's posturing. But... now that you're in Plan B, you SHOULD stay away from his blog. Let ML filter any important info to you that he may post. I wouldn't be surprised if he used his blog on down the line to reach out to you (since he'll soon discover he REALLY can't contact you directly anymore.)
Last edited by princessmeggy; 12/17/07 12:16 PM.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Well, Mr. Gray updated his blog today. I know I'm not supposed to look but it was suggested that I check-in, just to see what he would say bad suggestion.. plan B....you are working on programing your brain from including him in your thoughts... It bothered the heck out of my DIL, though!! yep and that's just more focus on emotions and feelings all wrapped up in him.... plan B...retraining YOUR thought processes.... AND people here should not be discussing his blogs...and his stuff... mr charlotte WHO?? in other words... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> ARK
Last edited by ark^^; 12/17/07 12:50 PM.
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Awwww....thank you, utb!!!!
That makes me feel SO good and makes me feel even stronger!!
I love the movie, too. I didn't realize it would end up becoming so significant!!!!
"I'm so sad, I got a worried mind...
I'm so lonesome...all of the time....
Since I left my Baby behind...on Blue Bayou...."
(skip to chorus)
"I'm goin' back someday, come what may...to Blue Bayou..."
etc.
(I'd better quit that now!!)
I love the movie version of the song with Roy Orbison a LOT better than the Linda Ronstadt version!!
Take care, utb!!!
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HI BELLEVUE!!!! Where the heck have you been hiding? LOL!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Good to see ya'!!
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LOL!!
Thanks princess meggy!!
Yeah, it was pretty amusing!
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Hi ark^^!!!!
Thank you, I know you're right. Mel suggested I check it to see what he posted.
Truth is, I would have anyway...but it won't become a habit!!
I promise!!!
So that's it for that!!
(Mr. Charlotte, who? LOL!!!)
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