Hey Charlotte,


Are you still baking? Is Mel helping you? Looking for an update soon.

Ace

Hi princess meggy and Ace,

Thanks for checking up on me. The holidays were going pretty good. We had some cousins show up on Christmas Eve that we haven't seen in a while.

Plus-my mom's best friend who's staying over there right now had her family come over, too. And DIL & DS25 came over with DGS. Plus my sister and her fiancee.

So it was good. We ended up hooking up the Nintendo 64 and having a good time with that. I started playing Banjo Tooie again and it's kept me pretty busy. LOL! That's one complex game!

I had to laugh when I saw Mrs. W's post about having Wii injuries! Ahhhh, video games...

Jonesy used to enjoy it when I got into a game because...well if you've really gotten into a game, you know how it is...you just can't quit!! So he always kept me supplied. Of course, that was a near trigger but after playing the game a while I stopped thinking about it.

On the Mr. Gray front:

Well, he charged some shipping on our account. I should have never left money in there, but I did.

Now I'm having a problem that started in July. Someone from a check-cashing organization stole account numbers and sold them to a data broker.

They sent us a letter but at that time, our account was okay. A couple of months later there were charges on our account, one of them was an airline based in Florida.

Okay, he called the bank, they were investigating. I received a letter the other day saying they were going to reverse the credit they gave us on our account. So I went through the file and found the letter from the check-cashing place (they're like Telecheck, etc.)

That's not enough for the bank, and you would think that it was concrete proof, but no. They want to have a conference call with Mr. Gray.

I am at a loss as to what to do. I sent Mel an email but she is out of town and I don't know how often she can access the internet.

The bank wants to take hundreds of dollars back out of the account. I recently paid some bills. So I guess I'll be the one to take a hit yet again.

I was doing okay but this upset me enough to where I started crying. I'm still upset.

I don't know what to do about it. And I think he charged the shipping charges on the account just so I would break "no contact" with him and call or something.

At least, I *think* that's why. Maybe it's just because he doesn't give a damn.

And me? Although I could grab a few radios and go to a pawn shop with them to get some money, I'm NOT going to do that. And I could. He would never know what was missing...there are so many of them here.

So I don't know what to do. This sucks.

It's like I'm still suffering because of his affair.

{{{{{Charlotte}}}}}}

Unfortunately, the ramifications of affairs are far reaching....even long after the affair is over. Look at it as "just one more thing" and keep plugging along.

I don't really understand the whole check cashing thing and the bank taking money out of your acct, so I can't really help there....except to say maybe you should close that acct and reopen one in your name only. After all, you are in plan B now. Plan B is about moving on with your life, it's not a waiting period for your H to return, although they often do. I feel you should start detangling yourself from him, in every way, especially financially.

So, I think you should call your doberman and get his advice. Then face the freaking challenge head on. Do what you gotta do. Maybe your doberman can give you the o.k. to pawn off some stuff to cover the bills? Your H is still responsible for the bills made in the marriage and should be solely responsible for the bills he incurs while separated. Has your legal separation gone through yet?

DO NOT BREAK YOUR PLAN B Miss Charlotte. You will set yourself back and hate yourself for it.

It is possible that Mr. Gray is trying to get a rise out of you. I am sure he is PO'd that you gave him the plan B boot and he can no longer get his fix of you. He needs time to get over that anger and get his head out of his [censored]. I am quite sure that your plan B letter had stipulations in it that are NOT unreasonable and marriage building.

Anyway, most waywards are complete jerks while in the fog. Yours is no different. If it wasn't so sad, it'd be funny.

This too will pass..... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

hey hey char {{{HUGS}}

I see you had a vidoe gamish christmas.....I can't really talk....my BIL and my Nephew and I were ALL addicted to Guitar Hero III.....all I can say is I rock....they haven't beat me yet. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

It's a New Year.....I think you should have a you day...go to the spa and get ready for the new you in a new year. The more you do foy yourself right now the better you will feel.
I know the drama is tought I have some of it now too (I think I have a stalker. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> The chick who cheated with my ex ex is now going after ANOTHER one of my guys.Long Story). But you are so strong we all have seen it. I know you can make it through. We all have faith in ya. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Hi mopey,

Thanks for the hug!

Yeah, this business is from July when bank account numbers were stolen in Florida by an employee from some check cashing place like Telecheck.

The bank said they needed Mr. Gray to call for a conference call. I faxed the letter that we received in July. Our account was breached in September.

So my dear intermediary is contacting Mr. Gray about this. There is no way in heck I'm breaking B!!

As for the damage he inflicted himself, I'm not breaking B for that either. I informed my Doberman and the next deposit is being taken out and I'll open another account.

I know I should have done this already but the convenience factor was like a siren song for me. But yeah, I think he was trying to get my attention, too. No way did he forget about the agreement. I don't believe that for one millisecond!

He knows what he needs to do in order to have my full attention.

If Mr. Gray doesn't call the bank for the conference call...well, I've already mentally prepared myself to take this hit. I'll live.

Thanks SIHW!!

Good to hear from you! Wow, Guitar Heroes sounds like a real blast!!

I may have to check into that!!! LOL!! I LOVE video games!! I've been digging around trying to find the original Nintendo so I can play some of those great games. So far I've found the Coleco, the Atari and THREE Sega systems!!! I have no idea how we ended up with 3!!! LOL!!!

Wow! I'm sorry to hear about your problem with that stalking chick! Man, what's the deal with some people?

I like your spa idea. I spotted one not too long ago and it isn't far from here. Now, if the bank doesn't kill me again with their random BS...I might be able to go!!

Well, I did get some Christmas money but I was going to use that for my discovery flight at the flight school.

Hmmmm...decisions, decisions!!!!

I hope you have a Happy New Year!!! I know I will!!!!!

Stick me with a fork...I'm NOT done...

I had a little bit of an episode last night before bed. Thinking too much so I had to change the brain channel.

Missing Jonesy.

And my intermediary wrote to him about the bank thing and he answered.

I was expecting him to ignore her so I thought it was a good thing. The bank hasn't removed the money as of this a.m. so maybe he really did call.

I don't know for sure yet so I will wait and see. But if he did, good.

If not, I'm prepared.

I don't know what his motivations would be to call them...truly, this only hurts me, not him. The money in there is mine for living, not his.

So, okay. I won't look a gift horse in the mouth. If indeed it IS a gift horse. Could be a Trojan horse, after all.

So that little incident set me back a bit and I was really missin' Jonesy for a while last night. I just had to STOP the movie and NOT think about him.

Easy! Yeah, right. But really, I guess I did okay. After all, I didn't freak out and try to call him or send any emails. Did I think about it? For a millisecond.

Not even long enough for an ant to sneeze.

I'm okay now, I guess. It's been two weeks since I've seen him and no contact except for him trying to get me to break it, apparently.

I had to remind myself about the bad stuff because I was only thinking about the good. I wondered if it was the same for him?

Maybe.

I don't know and I'm not supposed to speculate but I did anyway.

I am human after all. And we do wonder about such things.

I'm hangin' in, though.

Well, just had to get that out. Thanks for listening!

Yeah, I know. I can hear it now like Jenny to Forrest: "Are you stupid or sumthin?"

Charlotte,

No fork sticking!

This is going to happen it's part of the ebb and flow of all the stuff that has transpired.

Sucks when all the A stuff continues to hurt the betrayed even after the betrayed has exited the relationship.

It's truly amazing that people can be so thoughtless at times and feign ingnorance cocnering the hurtful nature of their actions.

Stay stron and hang in there. You're doing a great job so far and the key is you're healing yourself.

You're the prize here and Mr. Gray is missing out on you. I know it's hard to see it that way but honestly you are as you've shown through your actions and words.

LOL!! Awwwwww, why not?!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />



ITA!! This was really unexpected, though. Two weeks, I'm supposed to be better, right? Over the first hurdle anyway?



For SURE!!!!!



YEP! I'd have never thought he'd be so...well...DUMB!!! (Stupid is as stupid does, Sir!!!!"-Forrest)



I'm trying. Really, really hard. Well, it hasn't been THAT hard...yeah, I'm full of it!! LOL!! But I've been able to keep it at bay at least!



OOOOOO!!! I LIKE it!! I AM the prize!! Eat your heart out, Mr. Gray!!

I got one!!!! "It is one thing to talk bullsh*t, it is another to believe it!"-Forrest Gump

Perfect for Mr. Gray, eh?

I don't think he really believes the BS he's in right now but what can I do, really?

It's so cool that you happened to post at that particular time, 411...I was just thinking about emailing you around the same time, too!!

"do do do do....Twilight Zone!!!"

No, but really... psychic waves...Man, but there's a LOT of that going on lately!!!!!

It's all good!!!

It's getting so I have to answer everything with, "Now what?"

Phone, email, text...etc.

Apparently there's a problem with the insurance at the local drugstore. Now what?

Mr. Gray related? I don't know. He's not supposed to tamper with it.

I'm about to leave now to go pick up my thyroid meds and question them about it. I hope it's not Gray related. I really do.

Well, I didn't make it to the pharmacy on time so I don't know yet whether this latest snafu is Gray related.

Just to add to the fun, he didn't make the deposit into the account yet.

If I had any doubts about him trying to get my attention they are gone now!

On the bright side: I rode around for a while earlier, blasting some disco for a while and I stopped by a friend's house for a quick visit. They have a cockatoo that belonged to another friend that they want to get rid of.

So I might have a new houseguest soon! Her name is Peaches. She climbed on my hand like she knew me. I told my friend that she probably knows how much I love birds.

So I'm crossing my fingers here! He loves the bird but his wife can't stand the noise so I have a good chance!!

I guess I'll have to call my Doberman AGAIN. I don't want to have to do it, but what choice do I have?

I just hope we aren't going to have to have Gray hauled before the judge again.

I'm starting to think that the comments made by the process server might turn out to be true. He wanted to make sure he had all contact info because..."This looks like one that I'm going to have to serve again and again."

I never thought much more about him saying that until just recently. I hope he is wrong but I don't know anymore.

Well, it's still unclear as to whether the pharmacy problem is Gray related.

The kid at the window wasn't entirely sure what the deal was exactly.

So I guess I'll have definite confirmation tomorrow. At least I have the thyroid meds, anyway.

Mr. Gray has not yet made the deposit into the bank account. Did I already say this? If I did, I'm sorry. I don't feel like scrolling back right now.

I don't know why he wants to continue this crap. I just want to be left alone.

But he wants to continually flirt with violating court orders and potentially be dragged before the judge? Makes a LOT of sense, especially for someone who is already in trouble in CRIMINAL court.

Yeah, real, real swift, Gray.

I guess he enjoys being my Doberman's Dinner. What other reason is there?

And I'll tell you what: he hasn't been to trial yet for his DWI. Good possibility he's going to jail. Who do you think he's gonna call? Ghostbusters?

Well, he can call someone else for his commissary money!

I'm NOT going to answer!

In other news: The package I sent in November has now returned. I am having a dilemma as to whether or not to take it to my Doberman. I might. We'll see. I'm dang sure taking his voter's registration card, though. It took FOREVER to finally get him registered!

He'd better enjoy it now. Once he's convicted of the felony, he won't be able to vote. Isn't that how it goes?

It's getting to the point with Mr. Gray already where I really DON'T give a damn! I just want OUT!

I will go ahead and go through the motions of B and all but I've just about had it already. Enough with the games!

I know I thought he'd leave me alone so the love I have left is not killed. Okay, it's not quite dead yet but it's getting there...B or not.

I guess this is a good thing?

C22,

I just wanted you to know that I read your thread daily. You are doing well even through the frustrations of dealing with the numbskull. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> The A has a way of turning the most sane into the weirdest critters. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Is Mel still helping you from afar? I am sure she is proud of your progress. I like the name for your lawyer.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Stick to your current plan. As a BS, you will go through stages...... finally you will come to a plateau of acceptance and be able to move forward knowing you have done your best.

Waaay in the distances and losing more ground everyday will be the WS..... frantically trying to figure out, why the his gap between sanity and insanity has widened.......

take care,
L.

Charlotte - Stay in Plan B. Don't contact him. Don't meet ANY of his needs. Let the OW be responsible for that.

Thanks, Orchid!!



Truly, I don't know why I'M still sane!!!



Yes, she emailed him about the conference call to the bank. He actually answered! As Gomer would say: "Surprise, surprise, surprise!"

Me too. Now I just HAVE to get a Doberman so I can name him after my attorney!! LOL! But seriously, we had two while I was growing up so I really do want another whether I name him after my lawyer or not! It would be funny, though! And apt!



I'm going to stick with it even though I've been having insidious thoughts about breaking it just to talk to him, not for the other stuff that's going on.

I've been going through some withdrawals since the other day when Mel told me he answered her email.

Shame on me!! I'm behaving...I'm behaving!!



I can totally see this happening and I really think it probably is. Why do what he's doing otherwise? Just to be "Mr. Thing?" No. I think he wants me to think about him because he knows what's coming.

I might be wrong about that but I can't shake the feeling!

I don't know what will happen. I know we can't predict things but I really do think he is missing me.

I could just say go to Hades right now. I met a guy I really like...A LOT!!! But I won't get involved while this is going on.

If indeed there is something meant to happen then it will wait until this whole thing is done and I have waited the two years that is recommended.

I'm no weakling! I don't need ANY man to survive! But I've been meeting a lot of people and I guess meeting someone I click with is inevitable. But no...NOT goin' there!

I haven't even had the "what the heck should I care he's having and affair so I'll do what I want" feeling about it, either.

Do I question my sanity sometimes? Sure. Dealing with Gray is no picnic. I really thought he'd leave me alone. He has what he wants so leave me be. Yet...I haven't lost all feeling for him yet. I hope I don't.

But if he continues in this vein, I might! No guarantees! I'm sure he's thinking about that, too!

Sooner or later it will sink in!

Hi believer!

I won't! I'll admit that it HAS been mighty close, though! But I can hold out! I can, I can.

If that means holding out until the end of us...then so be it, I guess.

I'm getting better. I'd be better still if he wasn't playing sick little games trying to get my attention but "this too shall pass."

Hi Charlotte - Just lending my support!

Thank you, Big K!!

I'm still hangin' in there somehow!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />