Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 4 of 339 1 2 3 4 5 6 338 339
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 15,310
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 15,310
Quote
I think her true colors will come out over time. What do you all think?


Yep. That's the GREATNESS of PLAN B.

Quote
I just need a little reinforcement that my HUSBAND is gone to the mother ship, and that's why he hasn't called to show some concern. My HUSBAND would know how bad this hurts, couldn't he just muster some sympathy or is that just me being knaive.


You're in PLAN A. This gives you an opening to call him and talk how about HOW SAD this is for US fans...

The relationship between your H and kids can mend..if our family is any indication..first it was my H and our oldest son..now my H and our youngest are bonding again..it's taken 4 or 5 years..but my H himself said that he was willing to wait...that he has learned the value of TIME...my YS almost acts as if he has fallen IN LOVE with his father...whom he stated that he HATED during the AFFAIR...

HAVE FAITH, SG...

BTW, remember HE IS NOT YOUR HUSBAND..don't expect anything at all from him at this time...PLAN A is about THE GIVER in you..ONLY...


I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Hi Mimi,

And it's helps the giver in me to keep giving when I hear that not all is great over in happyland. I like hearing she is disappearing and it makes him angry. I like hearing that all she cooks for him is mostly fried food. I hear she keeps a black pan on the stove with grease in it and reuses it over and over again. That is just gross.

Remember, one of the babble items was that we don't live a healthy lifestyle. I would hardly think cooking in grease is a healthy lifestyle for someone who has heart disease in his family.

And I like hearing that she is preventing him from seeing his kids because she has to be around. I can only imagine one day that he is going realize what she is doing and wake up. Or is that too much to hope for?

I guess this helps me to have patience that time is TRULY on my side and that I just keep on working at becoming the woman G-d always envisioned for me.

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 259
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 259
Hey SG

I read about the death of the Redskins player this morning. I am a big NFL fan myself so I know how you feel.

Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you when I heard the news...

(((SG and her kids)))

Smartie

Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Oh Smartie,

This is SO SAD. He was my YS favorite player of all time. You should have seen his face when I told him this morning. It was awful.

Sean hadn't been playing the last two weeks and boy he was missed.

Did you read the news about the OW and WH and their happy world?

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
Honestly SG.. I think their little world is starting to crumble. I'm hoping similar things are happening in my WW's world.. but it's just that, hope.. stuff we see peeking through the windows into Affairsville.

Best thing the both of us can do, even in Plan A is to stay out of the way.. don't go rushing into that burning house for your WH... if he turns into your H somewhere in there, then maybe it's worth the risk.. but I'd wager if that kind of transformation happens he'll come running out first.

Be still.

I know it's exciting to see the cracks appearing in the dam.. but even this will take time.

Be still.

What is God telling you today?

((((SG and DS)))


Me - 32
DS - 5
DD - 13
DSD - 9
D final 12-8-08
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
Quote
On a sad note - Sean Taylor, the most talented player my beloved Redskins had on their team died last night from a gunshot wound he received Monday night.

SG, I read this and immediately thought of you. I am so sorry for your son. Tough lesson for kids. Life is SHORT. The best laid plans can disintegrate in the blink of an eye.

When my DH and I were separated, his SIL (his brother's ex-wife) was killed in a car accident. I thought to myself that surely this would be an eye-opener to WH. Nope, didn't phase him a bit. Later of course, he was appropriately sad but at the time, he just wasn't "there".

On the receipe, I would share... maybe not the EXACT receipe but an alien version of it... he he

OW: But I made it just like the recipe called for!
WH: (Gasping for breath, breathing fire... running for the porcelain throne!!) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
Quote
[
OW: But I made it just like the recipe called for!
WH: (Gasping for breath, breathing fire... running for the porcelain throne!!) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


PM.. you are the best. Thanks for a great laugh today! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />


Me - 32
DS - 5
DD - 13
DSD - 9
D final 12-8-08
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Oh PM,

Thank you for thinking of me. That is so kind of you to notice. I am sorry for your loss during that time. I have to say, Smartiepants encouraged me to really read your posts thoroughly as you did a Plan A for a really long time. Upon further review and since you are recovered - would you have done anything different?

Do you see anything that I could be doing or should NOT be doing?

I love the idea of that recipe. I think arsenic would be my secret ingredient.

Jamesus,

It feels good to laugh doesn't it. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
Quote
Smartiepants encouraged me to really read your posts thoroughly as you did a Plan A for a really long time. Upon further review and since you are recovered - would you have done anything different?

Oh, no, no, no. I actually didn't know about MB when I was going through it and I did the opposite of Plan A... maybe she had me confused with someone else on the Plan A thing. Yikes, no one should follow my story as to WHAT TO DO but rather WHAT NOT TO DO! That's why my link is titled, "SHOULDA BEEN the MB way" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

And yes, yes, yes! There are many things I would have done differently. Beginning with Day One.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
LOL,

So what would you have done differently or what could I be doing that you don't see me doing?

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
Quote
PM.. you are the best. Thanks for a great laugh today!

You're welcome. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
Oh, I think you're doing fine. I think you'll continue doing fine if you stick with Mimi... she's GREAT at Plan A stuff.

The only other thing I see, and I think you're already doing this, is what Jameus suggests... sometimes ya just gotta "be still" and regroup. Take those times of stillness to really listen to what God is trying to say to you... whether through circumstance, through posters here, or through reading the Word.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Like when I was driving home from CA on Saturday and on the side of the road was "Trust Jesus", only I put in G-d.

And then this was weirder, the whole trip I hadn't seen any of my WH trucks from his company. Right after I saw the sign, I saw one set of trucks on my side of the road and then the other side, almost minutes from each other.

And then not anothing one after that.

Mimi is the best, isn't she. I am very grateful to her. Yes, Mimi, I am sucking up to keep you around. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
I might add, I had NEVER seen that sign before.

And then the circumstance of hearing all is not well on that side, or there are cracks at the very least.

This OW isn't nearly as smart as I thought she was. I imagine she is feeling very confident that she has him nabbed. I would NEVER pull some of the stuff she pulls, like telling him to stay away from his kids unless she is around. Looking to make money off of a friend and disappearing for a day at a time. I can only imagine how pi$$ed WH was that day. Woo Hoo@

All the while I stay low, love him from afar, pray to G-d, live in G-ds will and wait for him to come home.

All the while, becoming who G-d has planned me to be all along.

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
Great attitude SG-

It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:

"And now, with God's help, I shall become myself." Soren Kierkegaard


johnstwin-

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther

Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!

Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,900
I am -so- putting that quote in my sig.


Me - 32
DS - 5
DD - 13
DSD - 9
D final 12-8-08
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058
One of my favorite quotes, too, JT.

Along with his "The further we get from our former ignorance, the less tolerant we become of that ignorance."

[/tj]

Mark

Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Q
Member
OP Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
I love that quote...

I am printing that up for my desk.

How are you today? How's the weather over there?

SG


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 15,310
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 15,310
SG:

Have you called your WH yet about the football player???


I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
Hi SG

Things are going well. It's been cold today and the weather was weird at work (rain, hail, sun etc) but it was great to come home to the valley and see snow dusting Cultus Mountain and the other foothills.

How was it down your way?


johnstwin-

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther

Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!

Page 4 of 339 1 2 3 4 5 6 338 339

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
2 members (doseedo, 1 invisible), 533 guests, and 40 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Bibbyryan860, Ian T, SadNewYorker, Jay Handlooms, GrenHeil
71,838 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5