Yep..go ahead with the PBL..resolves the issue about use of the field...

You know, I was actually thinking the same thing about the field. Thank you G-d for that.

Here is the Plan B letter one more time, please tell me to make any changes if you think.

My dearest WH,

I want to be your wife, in every sense of the word. I want those intimacies that we always dreamed about, to hold you, talk with you, laugh and cry with you, comfort you, as well as share the joy of raising a family with you. Each day that goes by it becomes excruciatingly painful to watch what is happening to our life and marriage, therefore, it is with the saddest of hearts that I must write you this letter. 24 years ago we made a vow to G-d and 10 years ago repeated our vows under the Chupah when we truly became as one. We were so much in love on those two days. The first time when we were young and full of hope and promise and the second time when we were full of making a complete lifetime commitment. We had been through so much and recommitted our love to each other, only it was stronger and deeper because we knew what we were capable of being together not matter what adversity we had faced. You and I together faced whatever came our way together and succeeded because we are meant to be together as husband and wife.

I’ve worked particularly hard these past couple of months to humble myself before G-d and ask him to create me into the wife, mother, and woman he always envisioned for me. People can change if they are willing to take a long, hard look in the mirror and hold themselves accountable for who they are and what they have done. I did that and I’m proud of the person I have become and continue to become because G-d is guiding me.

G-d has instilled in me that we can have a brand new, loving, and completely fulfilling marriage. I believe we can learn from our mistakes, grow from them and with effort and commitment we can begin to slowly rebuild the love that became the foundation of our marriage and start to become a family again, for our sake and our children’s. To have a new incredible marriage based on trust and honesty where we both feel safe sharing our innermost thoughts, feelings, fears and dreams is within our reach. The kind of marriage we both committed to when we said “I do” each time. I’m not naive; I know there’s been a lot of damage done. It won’t be easy but it can be done. I’ve had the good fortune in the last couple of months to meet many people who have been able to do it.

I’ve suffered tremendous pain from learning about your relationship with OW, dealing with our marriage falling apart and your decision to leave our home. I never once stopped loving you and I have not forgotten what a wonderful man you are. I know you better than anyone else, and I believe in you completely. It is my love and faith in G-d that has given me the strength and hope to go on. But the pain has become too much to bear.

In order to PRESERVE the LOVE that I have left for you, I've come to the decision to no longer have any contact with you at all UNTIL you end your relationship with OW and give us another chance. I will not talk to you or see you. Contact AB at or email him at in order to reach me for emergencies ONLY. I believe that we can work out a plan to restore our marriage and make it what G-d envisioned for us all along. The depth of love and commitment to our marriage is something that I have come to appreciate as having always being there and is G-d given as your covenant wife. I am willing to do whatever is necessary, but until that time, please respect my wishes.

Remember the day that we were in class together and you worked with me to bring down all my walls and you realized how much I truly loved you and had for our whole life. Tap into that my darling, because not only did it always exist, but continues to grow even during this difficult time.

Forever Your Bright Eyes,

Mimi, should I warn him of the LSA or just give the letter and have that be it?

I say just GIVE HIM THE LETTER.

I know how hard this is for you but it's the BEST for YOU and YOUR MARRIAGE.

Put him in GOD'S HANDS and PRAY WITHOUT CEASING.

I think your letter is WONDERFUL !!

You are A SPECIAL, SPECIAL JEWEL !!

I actually would prefer this way more than tell him what's coming.

I would like him to be totally surprised and caught off guard. It think this will surprise him way more.

I really AM ok with this. I KNOW it's what BEST for ME and my M. I just hope there will be a M.

And you are RIGHT, it's in G-ds hands.

What do I pray about?

I just hand him the letter and walk away or what?

Ok, one other question, are you sure it's best to give him the letter first and then the LSA or the LSA be served first and then given the letter?

And the reason to give him the PBL first is? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Yep. I'd hand him the letter and walk away...ASAP..

Why am I giving him the letter before the LSA and not the other way around?

You answered your own question.

But, it really doesn't make that much difference.

Whatever will make YOU feel better is all that matters.

I'm going for a walk. Wish you could go and we could CHAT!!

Ok, you got it.

Thank you. It's weird. I feel at peace and relieved that I won't have to deal with him anymore.

What's that about. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Me too. Maybe one day we can talk on the phone for real and laugh and share strengths.

Have an awesome walk.

I love you and thank you so much for your support and patience.

I don't think it's over yet though. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Queenie. I LOVE your wonderful letter. Very moving.

Thank you PM. I hope he at least reads it, instead of throwing it away.

No word from the lawyer on what day they want to serve him.

I'm at peace today. I find myself wanting it to just be over and me getting on with my life and seeing what is out there for me.

But I won't and I can't, because I have to complete this in G-ds eyes and wait for his blessings. It's hard though because I am lonely and would like to feel a little attention.

Is this normal?

Looks like you ARE getting some attention...LOL...just not the way you REALLY want it...God always gives us what we need! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

What do you mean, Rin? I am getting attention?

look at all the people who are supporting you here, you have all of our attention! it's just not in the way that you want it...LOL

LOL....

I am one BLESSED person. That is truly for sure.. And I am so GRATEFUL for everyone here.

I wouldn't have survived this far... and I don't take it for granted.

I didn't think that you did...I felt the same way...some days were lonely...just plain and simply...I, too, had to be reminded that I was not alone and I was loved and cherished!

it's gets better, truely it does and I think that you are doing a wonderful job! pat yourself on the back, your growth has been amazing!