Actually it IS me with those glasses. Remember I love jewels...

Nice tiara, don't you think?

Welsh, how cool. Do you speak it fluently?

Thanks Who, I am having a very blessed birthday, one that I am very grateful to G-d for. Thank you for asking.

LOL

Queenie!!!

Happy Birthday your royalness. You are the same sign as my SIL and she is one of the best folks in the world--must be something about those Pisces...LOL.

I tried to send you an e-card from work this morning but they blocked the sites. Silly work... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Anyway I'm so glad you got so many nice things today. You are wonderful lady. We are all blessed to have you here.

Smartie

No where close. I can pronounce it correctly and I understand a very few words.

Happy Birthday Queenie. One of these days if we can get together, I'll treat you to a BD dinner.

Queenie,

Hope you had a very great day!

Shabbat Shalom!

Mark

Thank you everyone for your kinds wishes and thoughts.

Shabbat Shalom, Mark

WH reached a new low today. MY DD called him for help with her car the other day. He told her he had a lacrosse game and on his way home would call her. HE NEVER DID... She really needed his help and he BLEW her off.

I get that he has no USE for ME, but his own CHILD. She is so pissed at him right now.

I hurt for her, because she knows that her dad is gone and she wants me to move on and just divorce him. I am in a no win situation accept with G-d.

My MS is having an amazing tournament. Since I can't call H, I would like to share with you all. He was the goalie for Friday's game. They tied and he had 6 saves. Then today in their first game they won 17-2 and he had 5 goals, in his 2nd game it was 17-5 and he had 3 goals.

He sounds like he is having a blast.

My YS emailed his dad that his first game in Monday. He doesn't want him to show up, but he emails him? See how I think that my kids miss their dad and that's why I am fighting so hard to save my M or create a new one actually.

Still garden-variety WH, Queenie..

This is not a NEW LOW..it is moreso the NORM, IMO..

AGAIN, ALL THAT HE CARES ABOUT IS HIS FIX...not anything else...



This is a BOUNDARY ISSUE..it's not your DAUGHTER'S ROLE to tell you what to do with YOUR LIFE..you are a WISE, GROWN WOMAN..she is basically still a child and can't possibly understand THIS..and is being DISRESPECTFUL to tell you what YOU should do...Does she assume that you can't think for yourself, that you can't take care of yourself, that you don't know what's best for yourself? My boys try to do this with me, too,about stuff..telling me what THEY think I should do about this and that.. but I call them on it. How would THEY know? I'm THE MOMMA..they are not the POPPAs..

My H abandoned our boys, too...and they are working on their relationships..there are still MAJOR STRUGGLES..but it's THEIR STUFF, Queenie...THIS IS BETWEEN YOUR WH and HIS CHILDREN....YOU can only be in CONTROL of YOUR RELATIONSHIP with them...

No one is around today, guess what book I might start reading. Boundaries???? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Once I learn how to establish a boundary I can enforce it, right? LOL

I didn't mean to give the impression I wanted to fix it, I really don't, ah, who am I kidding. I'll be back after I read. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

And what are you doing today?

That is AFTER this GODDESS gets her car cleaned. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I've made it a HABIT to take EVERYTHING out of my car..EVERY TIME that I get out of it...

Anytime there's TRASH in there..I throw it away once I get to my destination...

I THINK that is a GREAT HABIT to get into. Very good GODDESS TRAINING TIP.

Thank you,

Ok, I am putting it out here so I don't do it.

YS emailed WH telling him that his 1st game is tomorrow. WH emailed back and asked him where and when and what team. YS emailed him telling him JV team and he didn't know where. That was a lie because he had the schedule and location out.

WH emailed back and congratulated him for making JV as a freshman. If he was involved in their lives he would know we don't have a frosh/soph team. And that he wanted to get a copy of the schedule and asked if he could come to some of his games.

I am being honest. I want to delete the email. I know, I'm bad, but I am putting it out here so I don't do it and have to live with the guilt and getting in G-ds way.

I'm sorry for being so honest.

Stay out of it Queenie. You are so much like me! But better to leave it alone.

Good job on your car!

I know it's none of my business. Tell me why it's good to leave it alone? Besides it not being any of my business.

And you wanted to do things like this?

Thank you, I think you would be proud.

My sons' had a dad that was an alcoholic and constantly disappointed them. I tried to run interference, and it was a mistake. Trust me.

Better to let them work out their own stuff.

I have to be honest and just have it out there again. It's not that I am worried he will disappoint them. It's that I am jealous that he would offer to go see their games.

He doesnt' ever ask me how they are doing, he just wants to show up at a game and make it seem like he is the perfect dad. While I deal everyday with their school, anger, etc.

And then honestly, I am afraid they will all patch up their relationships and I will still be out of in the cold.

And as soon as I said this I realized I am trying to control and I HAVE TO HAVE FAITH IN G-D AND STOP IT.

I'm shaking my head, Mimi....

Queenie,

First, Happy Belated Birthday! Sorry I missed the actual day.

Next, let the email go. Why are you reading YS's messages from your WS? Don't do that.

As above, WS's relationship with the kids is HIS. You know you can't FIX it, so do your best to stay out of it. Give them your love as always and let the rest go.

It is hard, for sure. Remember, even this is part of the consequences WH must deal with due to his choices. It is hard for us BSs to see our kids go through it all,,,,,we don't ever want our kids to feel an ounce of pain!

Yet we can no more MAKE them good parents than we can MAKE them stop being WSs.

Be the best YOU can be and leave the rest to God

Blessings & hugs!

Thanks Bugs,

You are right of course. I have passwords to my boys accounts to make sure they aren't doing anything I wouldn't approve of.

I need to somehow just learn to not read it.

Thanks for the reminder to keep to my side of the street and stop trying to fix or control what is NOT my business.

My sons dad didn't pay a dime of child support. He didn't visit, call or contact them from the time they were 2 and 5 until they were 15 and 18. Imagine my SHOCK when my 18 year old told me he was moving to Oregon to stay with and get to know his dad.

Your children need a relationship with their father. Let them have it.

In the meantime, you can work on YOUR stuff.