Thats exactly how I would feel.

Some of the tax preparers have loans b-4 you get your return back. Maybe use it to secure atty?

Who told you you would take a big hit filing seprately?

Rocky

Big is also open for interpetation. Is big several hundred? several thousand?

Whats big to you?

Rocky

Who told you you would take a big hit filing seprately?

My SIL/brother's wife. She's done our taxes for us for a few years now, since H has been self-employed. She said I'll lose a lot of the deductions if we don't file joint. But at this point it'd almost be easier to do it that way. She can run it both ways, to see if it's do-able, but that would require me to have H's paperwork in my hand & apparently I'm only going to get it if I sign this d*mn "contract" he & his sister drew up! UGH

I'm not going to a commercial outfit & I'm not incurring MORE debt so that I can hire an attorney. That's pretty counter productive, given the state of my/our credit/finances.

Has he paid you any child support?

Not a lick.

Julie, I went through an ugly separation/divorce at this same time of year.

My soon to be ex had not paid a dime of support, either. He kept sniffing around the tax refund, waiting for the check to come in the mail (we filed paper), and calling me every day, asking if it came. Offered to split it with me 50/50, and my house payment was $1400 a month and three months unpaid at that point.

The day it came, I forged his name, signed my own and dropped it into the account I had to create for myself after he cleaned out the joint account months before.

I stalled as long as I could, then he called the IRS himself and found out the check had been mailed some time earlier. He had his lawyer pull me into court the following week and tried to have me jailed for forgery.

I brought receipts that showed that I made the three months' back mortgage payments, plus utility receipts (we had a 4 and a 5 year old daughter who still needed heat and food and clothes). When the judge asked him how much money he'd given me since he left, he said that the court hadn't ordered him to...yet.

The judge asked him if he was crazy and dismissed his motion.

Keep your paperwork, do your taxes yourself and have the money dropped into your account. Just hold on to it if you don't feel right catching up on bills with it.

Don't pay a preparer to get your refund on the spot. If you e-file, you usually have your return in your account in less than two weeks (usually ten days).

Julie, I would tell your SIL that you will agree to sign it and file your taxes jointly if he brings his child support up to date and keeps it up to date. What amount did you ask for previously?

He needs to be concerned about supporting his own children and household before he even thinks about getting tax refund money. It is AMAZING that he would have the NERVE to ask for refund money when he won't even support his own kids. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

You just HAVE to get a laywer, Julie, and force him to pay support.

Yikes, I guess this just became an ugly separation/possible divorce, didn't it?!

I plan to e-file.

I didn't consider the fact that we need to each sign, and as I recall it we don't, because we e-file from home/online with my SIL's guidance. (She double-checks everything & lets me know if I missed a receipt or skipped a blank, etc.)

I don't necessarily plan to forge his name but I also will not "agree" to any certain percentage w/o knowing what I'm looking at. It also seems I cannot file until/unless I sign his stupid "agreement" because I don't have his paperwork yet.

So, do I sign it, pretending to "agree to his terms"? Or do I delay, making him squirm (he probably realizes he NEEDS my paperwork to off-set his, along w/child tax credits & mortgage interest deductions, etc.) I cannot believe my husband is #1 trying to make me sign a document agreeing for ME to give HIM money, and #2 STILL not contributing to the support of OUR child(ren) or OUR bills! This is utter insanity!

Julie, change the paper around to say that you will give him 35% *IF* all back child support is paid and kept current. State that if not, you will be filing singly by XYZ date.

Two words and a brand name, Julie - "Tax Cut" by Kipplinger

Julie - please get this - you can find a way once you no longer want to be a part of the drama. When you reach this point, you will borrow the fees for the lawyer from a family member or friend or neighbor, but you will find the money. You can even get a lawyer to assign a lien to the tax return if you are good at negotiating and have the taxes there for him to see that there is a refund coming. You can then have your lawyer require your WS to pay his legal fees for trying to starve you and your children into submission.

Stop the drama. Find a way.

Finally - one last point, then I'll get to work - your SIL should be the LAST person to do your taxes this year. You might as well go to the person convicted of tax fraud last year because he ripped off his clients and have him do your taxes, as to have her do them. She doesn't need to know how much is coming.

KA, thanks for the posts. Please elbarate when you have a chance on "Tax Cut".

Also, I'm speaking of 2 different SILs here - SIL/H's sister/current IM is the one who drew up this fancy little document for H. SIL/MY brother's wife/does our taxes/has been thru my bro's EA/PA & an almost-divorce is fine to do my taxes, as she always has.

You're right, if I want out of the drama I'll find a way out & I thank you for your bluntness about this. I feel silly borrowing money or even spending it, for that matter, on an attorney when I still hold onto some hope our M will recover. But it's not looking that way, now, is it?

Lastly, as I was getting coffee a thought jumped into my head. What if I reply to SIL/H's sister/current IM's email/document by saying, "I'm not signing this. He has offered NO support for OUR kids or OUR bills. We will resolve this in court." I think saying that will #1-scare the crap outta him and/or #2-actually get this to court & somewhat remove the drama.

Thoughts?

Kayla I think you have the SIL's confused....this isn't WH sister that is doing the taxes (the IM)....it is her brothers wife....

Julie, they are not mutually exclusive choices. You can file for divorce, get yourself financially protected and STILL recover your marriage if he meets your conditins. There is NO REASON to not file for divorce and every reason TO DO IT. You must have financial assistance. It is his legal obligation to do so.

Please figure out how to file, Julie, and have a judge order him to pay CS. It is outrageous that he is not paying you CS.

Julie, I'm thinking that you don't even need the hard copy of his information if you're e-filing (which you can do by yourself). I think you can request a copy of his reported income from the IRS and use the information they provide. Everything was supposed to be reported to the IRS by 01/31/08 (as far as W2s, W9s, etc).

I wouldn't sign anything. That's a joke considering he has yet to support his children.

I'm overwhelmed and p*ssed off!

I'm not signing anything. I don't know if I will or if I should respond to SIL/H's sister/IM's email. I still don't have an answer on whether or not he's picking up kids tomorrow! Gosh I hate him. Really, right now I truly do.

I've got this timline in my head that was just rocked a bit. It went...
1. Sell as much as I can (mostly done)
2. Get tax info & file (now held up per "contract")
3. Fire SIL/H's sister/IM, designate neighbor/on my side/looking out for MY KIDS as new IM
4. Let him in house supervised by new IM to get whatever belongings he claims to be interested in.
5. Bring bills current with tax refund, give H "some"
6. File for D by myself or hire attorney, get proceedings started for him to pay CS
7. Margaritas. Lots & lots of margaritas (I kid, I kid)

Anyway he can get bent.

Julie

Don’t want to get into your finances and I am no tax expert but I have been self employed at short durations in my life.

Heres a few items to consider

I would not sign anything WITHOUT IT all out into the open.

Does H get a 1099 at the end of the year? SELF EMPLOYMENT FORM

If he does then it means he pays in no taxes all year long.
When you file jointly H’s taxes are paid out of BOTH of your returns.
In other words the money JULIE has taken out of her pay check on a regular basis all year may go to pay H’s taxes.

H has yet to contribute fianacially. Why should he share in a benefit of M????

Just my guess and opinion-H needs you more than you need Him for taxes. Without Julies withholding from her paycheck all year

HE MAY HAVE TO PAY IN >>>>>WOULDN’T THAT BE A SHAME TO GIVE H

A NEW BOTTOM IN HIS LIFE…………..

JUST ME-----I would make H squirm big time

JULIE doesn’t’ “enable” H in any way.

Julie gets the money for atty…File for D….ANOTHER BOTTOM…….Remember –you can stop at any point and try to recover M if H is willing…….

You may have to take a loss right now talk to your SIL tax preparer-If I am not wrong Taxes can be amended for up to 3 years. If you have to go back at a later point it would be OK. Right now this may make H really squirm

I would get a full printed set of the return with all H’s #’s. and have Your SIL draw a comparison w/H’s income and Just Julies income.

IF YOU CAN LIVE W/THE DIFFERENCE THEN I WUOLD MAKE H SQUIRM.

Just my hunch-You may be surprised.?
At least you will know.

#5-Why would you support H in any way????????????

Rocky


Me 49 –
WH 1987
A/CD treatment 8/1986
DS 24
DD 14
Married 25 yrs
WW 43
EA/PA –1986/1987 A Ended after 1 ½ yr seperation-NC w/OM for 4 months-Me N/C w/OW for 3 mo after W asked me to give her up
Mutual agreement to get back together
A/CD treatment 1988
EA/PA 2004?—10/2006? Mixed w/alcohol relapse
Treatment 12/06 W-Just wants to leave A in the past-“WE” know what to do
Me-Houston-We have a problem (we need to work on) here

I agree Nesre, and SIL & I are going to look into that. You're dead-on, he's 1099 & my taxes have always off-set his. I will lose deductions but I'm willing to risk it. He will absolutely squirm. (And have MORE reason NOT to pay me CS...till I slap him w/a judgment! (At which point he will be VERY angry/unwilling to reconcile, OH well, I hate him right now anyway))

All Julies doing is making sure H does not benefit from the M in any way.

What started all this?? Was it H's choice to---------?????
.

SO WHAT if H gets PO'd So F....in What

A judge will see to it he pays support of some kind regardless if hes angry or not.

Your just looking for him to take care of financially your children

AND HOUSE-which he probably has an intrest in-


Get to the atty-then drag your feet.....

I think Julies almost ready to open a can of whoopa$$

Watch out
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />


Rocky