Looks like we are having a spring day in the PNW.

Well I called the A today and said that no money has been deposited into my account. The A said he left a message with WH, and he hadn't heard back from him. Imagine that, so he was going to call him again. Unfortunately this Friday another payment will be due and I'm a little more worried, but I'm leaving it with G-d.

As for the house, something interesting has happened. Maybe... I have always felt like I am not done with that house, but I didn't know how. Well, I might have a buyer for the house, and if so, then I can move back in and rent it from him as well as set it up to be a clean and sober living environment. That would give me purpose in life and for the first time I am really excited about something.

Don't know if this is in G-ds plan, but I'm doing the footwork and will just leave the outcome in his hands. I would LOVE to have this happen.

This has been a blessing day from G-d.

The possibilities of my house are still in G-ds hands and that I am very grateful for.

Tonight at my PTA meeting I was presented with a picture frame with Redskins this and that stuff all around the frame with a picture in the middle of Jim Zorn and the principal of the high school, taken in 1976.

For those who have no clue, Jim Zorn is the new head coach of the Redskins and EVERYONE who knows me, knows I am the hugest fan their is.

It absolutely touched my heart that not only would the pricipal think enough of me to thank me, but that he would give me something that clearly took planning on his part and knew how special it would be. Wow....

I am humbled by this day and give G-d the glory for allowing me to feel very special and loved.

Wow.. now that is an amazing gift!

Sounds like you're doing really well Queenie.. so easy to see that God is watching out for you!

Sometimes it's hard to look past the 'circumstances' in our lives to see the blessings, but I am encouraged to see you focusing on the good in your life. That is the most wonderful blessing of all.

God is good to us.

Thinking of you!

((((Queenie))))

{{{{{{{{{{{Jamesus}}}}}}}}}}}

If I were to ignore the blessings that G-d gives me on a daily basis and focus on the negative, then I have learned NOTHING of what G-d intended for me to.

G-d is more than good, he is awesome and gracious.

((((((Queenie)))))))

Hey honey I MISSED YOU......I know we went through that on my thread, but I think you deserve your own huggs on yours. I just got caught up on what is going on in your life since I've been gone. Sounds like you are doing wonderful....not that I would expect any different....lol

That gift is awesome....I am so glad for you. How is everything else going/?? the sleep????

anyway, catch up with you later....not2fun

I need advice...

I found out from the insurance agent that WH no longer has a bank account and works in cash only. He also shared with me that WH feels slighted. He didn't elaborate how.

I'm just at a loss here to comprehend what is going on.

Is this what Plan B does to the WW, piss them off to where they try to destroy us financially? What am I up against here. Everyone thinks that I need to confront him, but that would be breaking Plan B. I WON'T do that, so what options do I have?

hmmmm....oh girlfriend....I'm not sure what to say....call your attorney and see what he says.....but DO NOT break up your Plan B over this just yet....

Hang in there....reach for that inner GODDESS .....

NOT2fun

He coulda gone all day without telling you this. Darn!

You asked for advice. About what? If it's the fact that WH is dealing only in cash, what does that matter to you at this point? If you think he's doing it to get around paying his support, then you need to call your attorney and tell him what's up. There has to be SOME record of where the cash is coming from. Won't matter to the Judge where it's going, except for the fact that he's not honoring the agreement.

And remember. How WH feels is a direct consequence of his choosing to carry on his affair.

((Queenie)) Sorry you're having such a tough time lately.

I share in PM's sentiment here. What does is matter that your WH feels 'slighted'. He can feel whatever he wants, as long as he pays his support and leaves you be. THIS is why you have Plan B, Queenie--to buffer yourself against this crapola. It doesn't matter WHY he feels slighted either, so stop wracking your brain over that one. IT DOESN'T MATTER. This is his freshly made bed. Let him lay in it.

I would report this new info to your attorney and let it go; his FEELINGS are not your problem.

(((Queenie)))

I back this post!


Personally, this is just like my WW making the point to tell everyone how she's got too much 'pain' in her memories of me, and most of it coming since she left..

Guess what.. that 'pain' is self inflicted.

She can deal with that crap.. and so can your WH... if their life is turning into a turd they can blame you and I all day long, but when the rubber meets the road they can either take responsibility for themselves, or wallow in their misery.. either way.. NOT OUR PROBLEM!

The advice I am getting from people is to contact WH directly and confront him over not paying me. That would be breaking Plan B. The people who are advising me, don't understand the Plans or that I am wanting him to come home.

I think he is getting around having to pay me support. I have called the A and he is sending out a registered letter with return receipt demanding payment or he will be taken to court.

Is this typical behavior for a WW in Plan B? I thought he would just simply keep paying and live out his life happy. I am leaving him alone to be happy and moving on. That's why I don't understand.

Where it's my problem is the withholding of money and not understanding at all when he is doing.

I gave him his freedom to be with the woman he loves. I am moving on and making a good life for myself. I'm happy, why is he slighted or mad?

He doesn't want me I would think he would be jumping for joy that I have simply created a good home for his children, they are happy healthy and living life? He gets to enjoy his happiness with OW and not have to be a part of us.

This is what I am not getting?

Since you are following the MB plans, stick to them. Any advice from outside parties is going to come from a place of worry over you, and wanting to not watch you in any pain. This process IS painful in some ways, but it is, by far, the best for YOU , in the end.

Contacting your WH is a no no. WHY BOTHER? You have an attorney--use him. Contacting him would only serve to cause more problems for you, and it would serve your own morbid curiosity, but at what cost to you? You are not going to be faced with some lovey dovey creature--he will be spitting venom, even if it is with a coy smile.



You're not wayward, why would you?



Again, why WOULD this make sense. It doesn't, so why are you trying like heck to make some sense of it. WE can't even tell you exactly why he's acting like a horse's patoot. We can speculate up and down. Just accept that he IS a horse's patoot until SHOWN otherwise.

Ok, no breaking Plan B. NO CONTACTING WW whatsoever.

WW is a monster who is spewing venom and would only do it to me.

No speculating because I can't think like a WW.

I guess I'm just plain scared. I'm scared because no matter how much I try to soften this and make excuses for him, I can't. I might have made a mess of our M, and even that's debatable, but this is just plain MEAN and I don't deserve this but more importantly neither do my kids.

I dont' know if I have the strength to fight him.

Queenie, if you're hurting for money, call your attorney back and asked if WH can be served via hand-delivery with a copy of this letter instead of waiting for the mail. Ask him to attach a proposed "Motion" or whatever method he will use to nail him in court, just to show WH that this is serious. He is NEGLECTING his children by not paying you.

That's why you have an attorney. He does your fighting for you. He's your gladiator... or your doberman as Charlotte has fondly named her attorney. Don't think of it as fighting HIM, think of it as fighting for your CHILDREN.

Queenie

Of course you have the strength to fight WH! And you have your faithful MBers as your royal army.

Not to mention G-d Himself...

I love you lots girlie!

Smartie

It's a natural response. As long as you continue to walk in the face of fear, you will be fine; stronger even, after all is said and done.

The lawyer is there to fight, you are there to relay information to him to fight with; you give him the ammo. That's it. He's your hired gun. Let him take care of this.

Hi Queenie,

You are most certainly strong enough. You've been through much worse than this. And stop blaming yourself for this please, you did not make that choice therefore you shouldn't feel bad becasue of the consequences.

Prayers Queenie.

(((((Queenie))))))

PM,

I am not hurting for money until Friday. Then I have a second round of bills that will need to be paid and the boys will want food. I borrowed money for this last check, but I won't be able to do that again.

TMTS,

I don't see where he is having any consequences. He is the one living a life with the woman he loves. All he is doing is not paying me money, I am the one juggling around for money. He is paying off his bills, etc. Or whatever. I simply don't know.

SL

What does walking in the face of fear mean? How do I do that?

I'm really trying here.... I'm just caught off guard by his ability to be so mean and cold. Everyone around me is being supportive but all they are doing is saying that this is who WH always was and just divorce him. Whose got a good prayer for this kind of stuff?

Wait, maybe I'll just go get on my knees and talk to G-d.