What recovery? I didn't think this poster wanted (or frankly should want) to rtecover with this "woman."

I disagree and do not see it as an issue of honor. There is NO reason for the OM to expect any gift from the BS here.

The right thing to do is tell him, but she is the one in the relationship and not me. Therefore she should come forth. If she wants me to tell him then I will; man to man, face to face. Yes I definately concur that recovery w/o MB will probably fail. I am just waitng to see what she wants to do. maybe she will change her mind and decide that I am not the one and he is. Then I will go back to my pitiful Plan B..child info only and go on w/ my life. This is the first real chance that any attempt at reconciliation has been brought to fruition. So I am seeing where this is going.

Jeremy,

IF you have ANY hopes of recovering (and I wonder why you would want to recover with a woman that would cheat on you and with you), then YOU should tell him NOW.

I was under the impression that recovery was not on your radar.

Any man that wants a relationship with a woman that has history of cheating is crazy. That includes the OM and the exH.

If a woman is willing to cheat with me while she is in another relationship I would not want her as a partner. Maybe the poster is flattered that she came back, but in the end this woman is bad news.

egg zak lee

Jeremy wrote:


Its obvious this woman hasn't learned or changed where she understands that an "exclusive" relationship is just that. This is just a repeat performance of her cake eating, but this time she is trying to make you the OM. And unfortunately, you bit.

Think about what you really want. Isn't it someone who respects and cherishes you? Do you think she respects you? Do you think someone who could be this duplicative with two men has any respect for either of them, truly?

But more importantly, why would you respect her after what she continues to do?


Take good care and God Bless.
Jo

Hi Jeremy, and welcome to MB.

You are doing well to read much here, and learn about what it takes to build a great marriage.

You will receive much information, as well as opinions here, and I urge you to recognize that every single poster here, whether they realize it or not, has a personal agenda that drives their advice and perspective. Some realize it, some don't.

My own personal agenda is to help BSs to work the plan, while not getting wrapped up in their own BS fog, thereby rendering their implementation of the plan useless.

I think in order for us to assist you further, a more detailed blow-by-blow of your M's demise, and your actions/feelings would help.

You wrote:


This sounds like you're keenly interested in getting back together. Do you? If so, why?

How reliable is your info on your EXWW's current relationship?

The focus on some of the recent posts has been on the SF...I'm interested in what you two talked about... Was she transparent? What did you learn?

I'll reply when there's more info...

L2F

lol


No, she wasn't. He learned that she was engaged AFTER she screwed him.

Hi again Jeremy,

You mentioned being in Plan B. Did you give your ex-wife a Plan B letter that explained what it would take to recover?

Jo

Jeremy,
Why are you waiting to see what SHE wants to do? First you need to decide if you even want to try. I see red flags all over the place and I am trying to figure out if you don't see them or are just in denial. Your wife is doing the same thing to her current bf that she did to you. What has she said or done to prove to you she won't do it again? Remember all the pain you felt and how long it has taken to get this far? Do you really want to take a chance of going through it again?