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It wasn't until I turned my x over to G-d that I started making peace w/in myself and growing.
You can't make h see or do anything.....can't do it. Heavens to Betsy, if G-d can't make His children behave, who are you to think you can get h to see the error of his way and change?
Woman, give him up. Don't stress over his errors. You have tried and tried and "it ain't gettin' you nowhere".
All you can do is let him sort out his own relationship w/ G-d and work on YOUR SELF and YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Would G-d want you to spend so much energy on this that you do not take care of your relationship w/ Him?
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Mimi, You're right.... Live MY LIFE to the FULLEST and let be what it will be... WHO GAVE YOU SUCH POWER AND CONTROL???? Years of watching people do this to me and I fought back in the WRONG way....
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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All you can do is let him sort out his own relationship w/ G-d and work on YOUR SELF and YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Would G-d want you to spend so much energy on this that you do not take care of your relationship w/ Him? No Cinders he would NOT. Nor would he want me to keep beating myself up for crap that is in the past and can't be changed. All I can do is NEVER repeat those MISTAKES again and somehow learn to love myself for who I am and learn about what I can become.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Yea..listen to Cinders and now she has herself a DIPLOMAT.. Sorry..just had to go there...  LAUGH, WOMAN...
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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A diplomat with possibly the big head. 
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,310
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So there's your SF NEED..LOL...
Are you LAUGHING, yet?
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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So there's your SF NEED..LOL...
Are you LAUGHING, yet? I'm taking a shower and dusting myself off as I blush about what I was thinking. Yes, there is my SF Need.... LOL
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,150
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Hey, The Diplomat has been around since January 2001 - we met Super Bowl Weekend. He lives 1100 miles from me. So, it's sure not helping my SF need. But, at least he will talk to me and listen to me...more than I can say for what's-his-name. You aren't getting me all worked up about The Diplomat.
OK, he is a guy and he can sometimes be sort of self-impressed. I think that's frequently a guy thing.
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What was the super bowl that year? I forget. LOL
Cinders, you deserve all that is good in life. And the diplomat is the luckiest man alive. Self-impressed or not.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,150
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I truly believe that my H is fighting for his soul and survival. I disagree. I think he's running as fast and as hard as he can, away from what he knows is right.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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PM, I disagree. I think he's running as fast and as hard as he can, away from what he knows is right. I'll bite and won't get sucked in, at least I won't try to... Why is he doing that, running as fast as he can?
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,150
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Because it is not pleasant to get out your mirror, look in it, see what's there, realize who and what you are, and work to be better. That's why lots of waywards are in the fog. The fog is more than affairs. The fog is the stupidity that overcomes them. They get so stupid they can't see who and what they are. And, they can't accept responsibility for the mess they've made and they refuse to do the work to clean up their messes.
It's too much work. It takes strength and guts and they don't have what it takes.
That, or it's easier to say it's all someone else's fault and convince yourself of that than it is to accept responsibility.
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Well, then that's his loss and his truest stupidity.
I guess I can be grateful knowing I was willing to work through this and recover our M. And that I did everything I could to save my M. That which I could do.
And that I was willing to truly look at myself and make those changes that needed to be changed.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,310
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I think you need to stop thinking about HIM period.
Who knows or cares what he's doing and thinking?
I want to talk some more about THE DIPLOMAT...and STUFF..LOL...
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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Ok, no more thinking about him.
So, yes Cinders tell us more about the diplomat and stuff
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 6,643
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You wanted more stuff? Here's something to ponder and help me bounce around.
The people who were going to give me an offer on the house don't want to buy it, but they want to rent the house. What are some of the things I need to be considering?
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Posts: 15,150
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I think you need to stop thinking about HIM period.
Who knows or cares what he's doing and thinking?
I want to talk some more about THE DIPLOMAT...and STUFF..LOL... You realize that if Kiwi or AW were here, they would think it 'racey' to talk about stuff.....stuff has to do w/ SF So, are we moving on to a discussion of sex? In which case,.......those of us who are forgetting what that's like might need to go take cold showers.
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Yeah..like..How come you call him DIPLOMAT..'cause of his strategic maneuvers??????..LOL...
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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Nope...because a Princess needs someone with some skills....you know, not just anyone would be appropriate for a Princess....think Princess Grace, think Princess Cinderella, think Princess about those folks. Would Ned In The First-Grade Reader have been good enough? Nope, he has to be ....... suitable.
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