Aww Bugsy.. it's always so sad when that sort of thing happens to a child.. particularly as young as this one. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers.

FWIW I'm with Guy up there and I think you're positioning yourself very well in all of this, and I'm seeing some strength in those boundaries again. Do good for Bugsy and Ladybugs.. everything else will fall into place as it is meant to.

Saying a little serenity prayer for you and the workstuffs too.

Thinking of you and yours, Bugs.


Fox

Ouch Bugs, that's a tough one. It devastates me when I here of little one's going through stuff like this. Hopefully she'll be OK and will never remember it.

Many prayers

Sorry to hear about the baby....but its really interesting the way that incidents happen to your family only to uncover something more serious. God's watching over your family!

Don't read ANYTHING into Drac's response. Your email may have come at an odd time....I suspect you will get an offer of more help later.

You've got a good head on your shoulders! You're handling all of this with much grace.

I say you GO for dinner in chicago. When I was newly single I had to almost force myself to get out there. Just look at it as new experiences, and remember you are in total control of what happens. Make new friends.

I'm with Lexxy--don't read anything into this.

Your nephew must be terrified. Hoping for a smooth recovery.

I am sorry about the baby. Life-threatening incidents can sure help put 'things' in perspective. The parents must be a wreck! So sorry.

I agree with others. Don't jump to conclusions about Drac until you hear back.

Thank you all so much for the thoughts & prayers. Lila is doing ok from the fracture,,,Very well in fact.

However, after the MRI late yesterday we have been told that she does in fact have too much fluid on her brain. They are going to have to operate. I don't have all of the details yet, but it's not so good right now.

Once the pressure is releaved, it remains to be seen if 1. her brain has been damaged, 2. If her brain will continue to grow (it may not).

Her parents are so young, our hearts are just breaking for them and for us. Our family has been through so much in the last year and a half. Yet, we are trusting God to handle this. It really is in His hands.

Drac emailed first thing yesterday asking for an update & for me to keep him posted. I had a horrible day at work and didn't get a chance to email him, and I hadn't gotten much in the way of any update until after work.

After he talked to Ladybug for their evening call, he asked to talk to me. He asked for an update, but I told him I'd need to call him back later. I didn't want Ladybug to overhear anything, as I haven't told her any of this and don't plan to until we know more about where things stand.

He asked if I had a minute to talk. I said yes. He told me about one of his best friend's niece's. She just graduated HS in the spring & apparently developed a meth problem. He's been reaching out to her and is the only one she is speaking to.

He wanted me to know that he'd asked her to come up to his house for the weekend so he could try to talk to her & come up with a plan to help her. He first went into that he'd asked her for this weekend, because he does not have the kids,,,,,,,and went on to say things about how he wanted me to know he'd never put them in any danger, etc. I said, "of course you wouldn't. That's not even a thought I'd have in this situation"

He continued, "Well, you never know what you might hear. I don't want you thinking any crazy thoughts. You might hear I have some 18 year old girl staying here and I don't want you to get the wrong idea"

So, I asked more about the situation, which he shared. I told him how glad I was that he was helping out. Gave some admiration. We ended with that I'd call him later.

I got busy after Ladybug went to bed, but finally called his house. He didn't answer. He called me a while later saying "I thought you were going to call"

I told him I'd called the house. He told me on some Tues. nights he goes down the street to a bar to listen to the band after DSS goes to bed. He said they start at 9 and they still had another hour to go, but he was headed home.

So, I filled him in about Lila. He was supportive & reassuring. Not overly so, but in a 'friendly' way. It was about a 15 minute conversation, ending with him telling me to try to get some rest. I emailed him later saying Thanks for the support.

So,,,,,,,today I'm outta here in a bit to the airport, flying to Baltimore. Hope to get some work done on the plane as I am way behind on so much stuff!

I am a bit excited, as this is my first 'East Coast' trip ever. Am hoping to have a little time to do some looking around.

Bugsy:

Sorry to hear about your niece. I hope it works out.

Your interactions with Drac went well.

I don't think a person with addictions problems should be "trying to help" someone with a meth problem. Once she realizes that Drac ain't giving her cash, she will be gone. He won't see that, but who knows.

And about this:


You should have said something earlier! Silent is about 35 minutes from Downtown B-more. She could have met you for a drink in Fells Point. Don't know if you ever watched the program "Homicide" but she could have cruised you through some of the local bars that that filmed the program in.

Even if your stuck in the wasteland between downtown B-more and Wash DC, (where BWI Airport is...;) Still, with a rental car, MUCH to be seen, within about a hours drive. And the sun goes down at 7:30, so you still have some daylight left.

If you have never been to DC, then I recommend a driving tour one of the nights, the monuments and various building are amazing at night.

LG

There is a great steamed crab place on Fort Street called LP Steamers. It's a dive, but excellent food! It's near the Inner Harbor, you can see the big Domino's Sugar sign. It's in a residential part of town, so even though it looks kinda run down it's safe, people even leave things out overnight, lol.

HTH

Oh, and I forgot, I'm praying for your nephew's daughter...

I keep up with all of you even though I rarely post anymore...

If you can't get out of the immediate Baltimore area try to see the National Aquarium. Probably the best in the world.

It would be cool if you and SL could get together. She just mentioned that on her thread yesterday.

I agree about the Aquarium, we just went Labor Day weekend and had a blast!!! Great frog exhibit, now my 3 year old asks that we have "Spaghetti and meatballs with tomato frogs" instad of tomato sauce. Yes, there are such a thing.

Plus, fwiw, I think you could do much better than Mr Match.com drac. IMVHO.

Bugs, I think your interactions with Drac have been going pretty well.

There was the time you showed him your cards and where you wanted things to go, and he balked. I think you would agree that it was probably premature--that you might have jumped the gun a bit. He wasn't ready. (He may never be, of course.)

Maybe you should try to pretend that interaction didn't happen. Don't draw any conclusions from it. Throw it out as a flawed data point.

It seems like that's basically what you're doing.

Have a great trip. I agree that the aquarium in Baltimore is pretty cool. Also that it would be great if you could meet up with SL.

OK, bells and alarms went off when I read this...this is one of moments when, during this time when you are both holding your cards very close to you, he just showed you his hand...but you still don't know what the game is...

If it were me, and I usually think of these much later...but it's OK to refer back to a statement...I would have said something like...

"We are divorced, and you are allowed to see or date anyone you want. Thanks for letting me know about this situation so I didn't worry about the kid's safety. But I wonder if you are being considerate about my feelings because you know I still care, and I would be hurt if you got involved with another woman."

So in this tennis game you both are playing, there are many times he is sending the ball over and you are not returning it...and that's OK...but he left himself open to have it volleyed back. I wonder what he would say?

Bugs,

I will also be praying for your neice. Hopefully they will be able to remove the fluid and no damage has been done.

As for Drac. I think it is great that he is willing to help someone, It maybe a sign that he is thinking about someone other than himself. The fear I have is even if he has no intentions of doing anything but talking to her, why take the risk. A young girl with a meth problem and a guy that has no problem cheating on his wife equals too much temptation. There are many other agencys that can help her without sending her off to jail.

Hey, Bugsy!

If you are in town, lemme know! Maybe we could meet up or something, depending on how long you are here. I work in B-more, and have the weekend free, including Friday night. I can also get a sitter if you wanna just meet for drinks after work. Hope to hear from you.

SL

I WANNA COME, TOO!!!!

B-more is like on another planet!

Ew!! That would be incest!

Gross, Man!

Charlotte

OH!! BF's niece. Thought they were related.

Yeah, but still, BF...lots of times it feels like family so I stand by the last post.

Charlotte

Silent:

B-MORE ROX...

Shouldn't that be:

B-MORE ROX, HON!

LG