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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 72
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OP
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 72 |
Hi,
Have a question - do you use condoms with a FWH even though they was w/ you unprotected while with the other women(he said they only had unprotected sex once, they slept together 5 times). I just found out on Sat., he said it ended in July and it was done within a 5month period. We have not resume intercourse, he of course doesn't seem to be worried about STDs but I am and plan to have him do a STD testing he doesn't want to do the culture one though. So if you was already expose to you still use condoms when you plan on resuming or resume?
Last edited by ANewBeginning; 09/17/08 03:07 PM.
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150 |
A Tisket! A Tasket! A Condom or a Casket!
No Glove - No Love!
Condoms break. And, they don't prevent every STD
No sex without all the testing possible. This is a logical consequence of not keeping his 'pride' tied.
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 72
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 72 |
yea, I figured that. But if we were having intcourse during those 5months plus the 2 months he stopped would a condom do anything? Wouldn't I already have what ever crap he brought home? Like I said we haven't started anything since a found out but the fact we were before I knew about the situation I was just wondering if it will help, isn't it too late now. All that is left is getting tested.
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,698
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Joined: Apr 2008
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It is entirely up to you and what makes you feel safe.
Do get every test that is available tho, and the same for him. No choices, no negotiations.
Recovered marriage, recovering self, life gets better everyday 
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150 |
This is a logical consequence of not keeping his 'pride' tied.
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150 |
You would not necessarily have been infected at the first exposure.
And, since I have a friend whose husband died of AIDS, I would recommend testing ASAP, and 6 months from now, AND 6 months from that date.
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,144
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,144 |
ANB~
NO sex before testing! And if he won't go, or drags his feet, YOU get tested. Tell your gynocologist you want the full screening for ALL STDs. Hate to tell you, but all waywards lie, or release the truth in stages. Some details never come out. So protect yourself as though the worst had happened. Odds are there was more unprotected sex than he's admitting, and even one exposure could've put you at risk. Don't dally. Get tested right away.
You owe it to yourself.
Me BS 61
Him FWS 63
Married 40 years
D-Day 6/30/06
Still can't believe it.
6/08 Recovering nicely. Anything is possible!
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,288
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Joined: Jun 2008
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Everyone is correct...do not have unprotected sex with him.
A little about the "we did it once without a condom" lie.
Ask him which time it was. If he says anything other than "the last time"....he's lying....just like my W is right now regarding the exact same scenario..."sex 7 times...6th time was without a condom...the rest of the time was with one." It's all bullsh!t. People DO NOT have repeated sex with a condom, then go bareback, then go back to a condom.
"Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth"
Henry David Thoreau
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