The reality is we DON'T know when and if he will get his.

All we do know is we are going to MAKE IT..

YOU CAN DO THIS. You are ONE OF US...

We are STRONG... We are SURVIVORS...

And if nothing else, hold onto the fact that one day you will NEED to help someone this through just like we are with you. G-d has plans for you.

TRUST HIM.....

Sorry, but I've lost my faith in God.

Not to sound mean, but I prayed literally for 3 years to God, to saints, to whoever would listen, for ExH to come back, to leave her, heck, even to admit to me he had an A!

Nothing. So there's a God you say? Well where is he? He sure hasn't been helping me these last 3 years.

Looks like he's been helping the sinners. Helping my ExH, who never even had a faith and never prayed or went to church. Helping his wh$re, get my ExH! He must have been helping them, because they seem to have gotten what they wanted by being sinners, and I was the one who believed, went to church all that stuff, and where did it get me?

Your in luck I have enough faith for us both.

Because I believe in you and for what you have stood for and walked through.

Catgirl - Things will get better for you. I took me about 3 and a half years to feel good again. You need to do your grieving and take good care of yourself. And my bet is the marriage won't last long.

They both know they have a cheater on their hands. And your husband at least, has given up a lot for the OW. So now he will be thinking that she'd better be worth it. And she will be resentful of his family time and the money he has to pay.

Perhaps HIS way of helping you is to keep your lying, cheating, no good excuse for a man husband away from you.

catgirl, God is not a cosmic puppeteer who forces people to do your will AGAINST THEIR WILL. God allows people to choose evil. He gives us FREE WILL. Can you imagine if God came down and MADE you do something against your will? If you lost your faith over that, then your faith was very misplaced, because God never promises to make people do your will at the point of a gun.

B R A V O

except for the spelling typo

I hope you are right Believer, but again I ask...shouldn't OW and ExH have realized it all by now? Why is being M going to make a difference now, if they've been living togehter and he's been paying me and seeing his kid all during those 3 years, why would somehting all of sudden make them break up now?...

Melody...So then what exactly do I pray for?! I ask God to help me cope. Apparently I'm not...

I understand God is not a genie who just grants any wish you throw his way.

But I guess I see it as God giving it all to ExH who doesn't even believe!

I don't know, I guess I just don't understand it all. I'm tired.

Well, I would realize that God is not SANTA and stop sending him your wish lists. God is interested in doing HIS WILL, not yours. Pray that His Will be done in your life and move over and get out of his way!

Melody... I will try

But how do I handle seeing God do "His Will" on my ExH and OW by giving them what they wanted.

Sorry if I'm such an [censored], but I guess I look at it as it's not fair. Yeah, I know, life's not fair, but God's will is to make ExH and OW happy and me not? He's rewarding sinners and punishing me?

Maybe I need to talk to clergy to straighten me out on God.

catgirl, God does not help someone in their sin. He does not promote adultery, he is against it. Remember the 10 commandments? Your xH has free will as Mel said. God has no part in this, in fact God weeps over his lost sheep. I will pray for you. I will pray that you open your eyes and heart and see that God has been holding you and weeping with you the last 3 years.

huh?? That is not GOD'S WILL! Good grief!! sheesh, crack addicts are also "happy," [for awhile] does it mean they are blessed by GOD? Car theives are happy when they steal a car, does that mean they are blessed? Your XH is on the path to he11 and you admire him? CAT... CAT..... wake up, girlfriend!

Cat:

If YOU could comprehend GOD, then He wouldn't be GOD. He wants us to have FAITH in HIM and BELIEVE in HIM. HIS ways are MYSTERIOUS, not for MAN to UNDERSTAND.

Proverbs 2
Moral Benefits of Wisdom
1 My son, if you accept my words
and store up my commands within you,
2 turning your ear to wisdom
and applying your heart to understanding,

3 and if you call out for insight
and cry aloud for understanding,

4 and if you look for it as for silver
and search for it as for hidden treasure,

5 then you will understand the fear of the LORD
and find the knowledge of God.

6 For the LORD gives wisdom,
and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.

7 He holds victory in store for the upright,
he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,

8 for he guards the course of the just
and protects the way of his faithful ones.

9 Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair—every good path.

10 For wisdom will enter your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.

11 Discretion will protect you,
and understanding will guard you.

12 Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men,
from men whose words are perverse,

13 who leave the straight paths
to walk in dark ways,

14 who delight in doing wrong
and rejoice in the perverseness of evil,

15 whose paths are crooked
and who are devious in their ways.

16 It will save you also from the adulteress,
from the wayward wife with her seductive words,

17 who has left the partner of her youth
and ignored the covenant she made before God. [a]

18 For her house leads down to death
and her paths to the spirits of the dead. 19 None who go to her return
or attain the paths of life.

20 Thus you will walk in the ways of good men
and keep to the paths of the righteous.

21 For the upright will live in the land,
and the blameless will remain in it;

22 but the wicked will be cut off from the land,
and the unfaithful will be torn from it.

I guess I need to start reading my bible, however I must say I always had a hard time understanding it.

Thank you Melody for the Proverbs. I will read them daily and hopefully I can find comfort in them.

Catgirl - I went through a crisis of faith, just like you are experiencing. It felt like I led a godly life and the affairees got all of the blessings. But it didn't last for them. Plus I have the comfort of knowing that I mostly took the high road.

I'll be praying for you.

Believer,

What you said is *exactly* how I feel. I guess I didn't know how to put it in words like that.


Yeah I feel like I've done good things in my life, or at least I tried to. Always put my kids and family first... No I wasn't a perfect wife, but I never cheated on my H or anything like that. I used to go to church every week, volunteered at school, did charity stuff etc.

And yeah, now I feel like they are being rewarded for doing bad.

It's a hard pill to swallow at first. But I promise you it does get better. If the affairees have any integrity at all, they know they have done wrong. Their marriage will NOT be blessed.

You have done the right thing, and in the end will be blessed. It is just very hard in the meantime.

Maybe that's why ExH has to yet tell DS about M? Becuase he knows it's wrong and is ashamed to?

Doubt it though. He has no morals.

The psalms work really well to.

Hi Cat, I've been worrying about you, but here you are getting so much love and guidance from the best.

Sleep tight