LOL, my team is deadlocked 0-0 almost halftime. I'm sitting here working on student records and listening to the game on the internet.

ah the internet, how did I ever make it all those years.

:RollieEyes:

I feel POWERLESS, Queenie.

I keep saying the same things to ya.

You keep going to the same place.

Queenie - Have you ever thought about getting a tummy staple or ring? I have several friends in my Bible study who got them and are doing great. Forget if you have insurance or not, but it is usually covered.

Of course, you need to learn to eat differently. But I have seem amazing results.

I have checked into it many times. My insurance won't pay for it at all. Or at least last time I checked.

However, I'm not opposed to looking into it again.

I will still need to work my food program. I don't have such a great relationship with food and would need to be just as careful.

Good idea....

Mimi,

I have to learn new ways. I'm fighting as hard as I can. I know you think it's a mind set, and maybe to some extent it is.

I'm just saying I'm not doing it on purpose. I wish I could explain if for you to understand, but I can't. You aren't an addict, you don't understand how I could do what I am doing.

I'm really sorry.

I have several friends who did it. The problem is that once you get too overweight, you practically have to starve yourself. I have another friend who did that, and she did lose the weight over 7 years.

Check with your insurance. Sometimes they will look at it as a therpeutic thing.

And you WILL have to change the way you eat. The best programs are where they teach you to eat better.

One lady in my Bible group went from a size 28 to a 10. Both her daughters were heavy (herditary) and they went from a 24 to a size 4.

Hi Queenie-

About the CS stuff...contact the court clerk where the judgment was filed and let them know he isn't paying. They will either file with the Support Enforcement Office or tell you how to do it. You don't need to get a lawyer since the LSA was signed by a judge.

Our state is BIG on support enforcement and have the big offices to prove it. :RollieEyes:

If he is getting paid somewhere that has his social security number, then the money will come directly from them to that agency and then to you.

Hope this helps-

I'm talking about your negative thinking and not having faith in God, saying that you want to give up and end it all.

What happened to learning to love yourself?

I didn't mention the eating.

I KNOW MANY ADDICTS who work on BOTH ASPECTS.

Old behaviors, old thoughts, etc are so hard to change.

I have worked through so much. I have kept fighting even when I didn't believe I could or wanted to. But the depth of self hatred for me runs deep. I'm sure most people could NOT believe it or even understand it, just change your thought.

Mimi, I have been abused emotionally for years, almost back from my parents. I'm not calling myself a victim, I'm just telling you the old tapes are just playing loud more recently because it's all I know.

I'm working on new ones, I'm praying to G-d for help, but it's a battle that I am in right now. I believe I will get through it, but if I keep the hate in my head, then it will destroy me so I post here because it's a safe place for me.

I don't know if that would even make more sense, I'm just being honest.

This is the PLACE you keep coming back to..

You HAVE admitted being a CONTROL FREAK in the PAST.

I'm LEARNING to love myself, haven't gotten there yet.

I will actually own up to my faith in G-d has been challenged and maybe diminished, but I have been praying harder for help with that.

I'm fighting, I really am.

:crosseyedcrazy:

JT it helps absolutely. I will do that on my lunch break tomorrow.

thank you

I KNOW you are FIGHTING...I believe you...

But what do you do when you have those THOUGHTS?

Fight them or give into them?

You should have a headache by now.

Sadly it's rearing it's ugly head again.

:twobyfour: to me

I start praying...

I fight them...

I beg G-d to help me get through it.

When I am hungry, angry, lonely and tired, I can only fight so long before I just give in. I have been struggling financially since July, I have made extra money, but it's not enough to make a difference. It has been the beginning of school, which is always overwhelming, busy and my boss has been on my butt to change to be more like her. She is anal, concrete sequential. I am abstract the opposite.

I have been a catered to spoiled brate most of my life and learning to take care of myself is HARD for me. It's not anything I have ever known. I am NOT assertive, I hate confrontation. Etc.

Truth be told, I'm exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally, but that's when I am most dangerous... So I have to keep fighting by surrendering if that make any sense at all.

Isn't it interesting that you say that you are a CONTROL FREAK but you want to CONTROL OTHERS but not yourself?

I'm a CONTROL FREAK, too, but I'm very "ANAL"..don't like that description..let's call it "OCDish"...

I probably have an EATING DISORDER, too...

I have WIERD eating habits...more ANOREXIC "tendencies"...I count and weigh food...hide it..throw it away..stuff like that...CONTROL OVER FOOD...

Yes it is. Though my food is the one way I control myself. If it's good then I think I am a good person. If its destructive then look at me, I'm a piece of crap and deserve all that's bad in life.

LOL, yes Ma'm, OCDish it is.

How WEIRD....

Ok, I might have issues with control. I might have a terrible self-esteem.

But I will always pull myself out while the Redskins are winning. I really wish they would win games with less drama. But I'll take it anyways.

That was too close for me.

Looks like Queenie might be back!!!


That attitude adjustment seems to be working.....

The Redskins won.....

Queenie would never be in a bad mood then..

I'm learning to not be in a bad mood when they lose..... Not so easy.