This is from an old Jackson Browne song - and maybe supports the old hippie theory:

[I'm printing it here because the last two lines of the song - in bold below - were quoted in Mr. Cosmic's email.]

I'VE BEEN OUT WALKING Lyrics

This song appears on the album For Everyman as "THESE DAYS" with slightly different lyrics".

I've been out walking
I don't do too much talking these days
These days
These days I seem to think a lot
About the things that I forgot to do
And all the times I had the chance to
I stopped my ramblin'
I don't do too much gamblin' these days
These days
These days I seem to think about
How all the changes came about my way
And I wonder if I'll see another highway
And I had a lover
I don't think I'll risk another these days
These days
And if I seem to be afraid
To live the life that I have made in song
Well it's just 'cause I've been losing so long
Well I'll stop my dreamin'
I don't do too much schemin' these days
These days
These days I'll sit on cornerstones
And count the time in quartertones to ten
Please don't confront me with my failures
I had not forgotten them

My theory is that many of those people ruined most of their brain cells dropping ACID and smoking hoochie weed.

Reading this thread is extremely frustrating, w/ Mr. Mellow telling you to be "cool" and just accept the cosmic nature of his taking your W. It's telling the victim to be cool while he is victimizing him. He probably would not be so cool if someone was carrying the TV out of his house. He probably would not be so accepting of his "brother" needing that TV because it was "natural" to want to watch football on Sundays.

He is stealing from you and expecting you to just take it. His "truth" or separate reality seems to be whatever he does is ok, because if it has happened it must be "natural." However, what you do is not ok. [Seems to me that nothing on the planet is more natural than kicking the living **** out of him. - Dont do it though because: 1. It's illegal and you will go the jail; 2. It will be the basis of legal action against you such as a restraining order; 3. It will be used to portray you as an out of control crazy criminal; and 4. There are better ways of dealing with him.

This is not legal advice, but it seems to me that one way to handle it is drag him into court for a restraining order to stay away from you or your kids, then get him on the stand and have him explain the meaning of the email he sent to you. Once the judge gets a load of him, I think good things will start to flow in your direction. You stay in control and just let him twist off. A side benefit is that this will immediately start to cost him money and force him to deal with a reality that is not so easy for him to manipulate.

YES!!!! I found it!! She deleted this and I had to jump through some hoops to recover it, but this email was sent from OM to WW right after I discovered the affair and made several calls to him to confront him (the coward didn't answer). Initially, I was told he was a woman as he has an androgynous name. I saw the # on her cell phone and low and behold, a man answered. I confronter her and she confessed it was a man. She said she didn't want me to worry since I was sick. I could barely walk at that point, only a couple of weeks out of the hospital. I eventually hacked into a hidden email and found a lot. But this one is a gem and has some more psychological insight to this creep. Enjoy~!


Being a man, I can not hide behind the reality of our being able to live in a total state of denial concerning certain matters, for instance let's start with matters of the heart. Well, to put it plainly we have no capacity to deal with most situations that fall in this category. In the area of Love I think you will find us at are most vulnerable place. In my life I have fallen trap for this syndrome and please do not think I am above this for I am a man, so anything is possible. We are weak when we do not get our way with Love. We are also most often completely oblivious to this state of mind until we push it away, of course then we want it back, no matter the cost. The manipulation of children, friends, family; anything or any one is prey to this action of pity plying that you are going through. I stated to ' the husband' a few things in our conversation that obviously fell on deaf ears. Even though I repeated them after a reminder of just how things are. First and for-most is the right to dictate another policy in life. This is an age old problem men have, usually what we want is something we can not have, in the event it is a wife, usually it goes like this; we abandon all nurturing practices and consume ourselves in our own agenda, the wife becoming a spring board for taking care of domestic things why we try and dominate from a point of idiocy.

When we have pushed the Love one and ignored her into independent thinking, then action completely alienated that is when we spring back into action to save the day, the white horse syndrome, the gallant hero who can promise the world to another then regain control. We also choose to blame just about anyone for everything....the family dog is not even safe in this time. The kids will be manipulated dearly, the friends will be inundated with [censored] and bull till they would just as soon jump out of the window and break a leg as hear it one more time. The mothers in laws are the easiest prey, they already have pent up frustration with the child they have never understood. Add in an illness and you assume the roll of Atila the Hun, a self serving [censored] that is heartless and insensitive. We do not realize we have already pushed you beyond the line of decency and past being able to have any respect for change or anything different, you know what you have and nothing is going to change this, it is not possible or you would not be reading this from me. You know sincerely where you are and where you will go if you do not make changes. I have to much respect for you to think you are just out on a whim here. He will stay in denial for years, quite possibly this lifetime and many more to come. What is promised in this time from a man is pure [censored]; I trust you know this already. Drugs or no drugs, (he refers to my medication)he is not capable of any rational act in this place, talk about lies and any other changing of the facts to suit his need, well the sky is the limit here, there is no mountain to high that this state of mind cannot hop over. We are at our best when it is simply Too Late, without a doubt. Trust me on this. Second point made was the act of telling another what to do or not to do. This is the ultimate lion trap for men, we fall into it every single time, even when well marked, we just use example one to create the illusion that this is a God given right, which is simple to do.

In our conversation, him, not you, I reminded *** of these two male rights of passage he was assuming in his concerned husband role of the phone call. The consummate male crap about how he does not understand why you would do something like this, everything is just fine in our open relationship....blah, blah, blah. More denial, more lies said out loud to feel better about all the manipulation done and yet to do....we just do not get it. I promised him just one thing; you call me and tell me what not to do and I will for surely DO IT, you tell her what she cannot to and she will for sure DO IT. After referring to the "My myspace page" website for research into substance and reference, and please excuse my need for honesty ******, I found crap, the typical mythical hype lined with fantasy about substance. I felt sorry for you put bluntly. After reading the blogs I assumed that this was the scholar/nut case syndrome of male idiocy at it's best. The negro college fund motto comes to mind here, a mind is a terrible thing to waste. But what is most needed to point out here is that a kindred soul and sacred spirit, wrapped up in a drop dead gorgeous body with a smile that would brighten a cave to blinding, sexy in ways that would make a blind man see, brain that is gifted to take a dollar and make it a twenty, spend ten, on the family of course, then turn the ten into a hundred common business sense, a drive that would put a spaceship in orbit and kindness that would keep mother and parenthood in perspective for 12 kids yet alone 2 kinda gal. One who could whip a room of hippie wanna be's or Harvard scholars into a frenzy without even trying kinda girl that only will get better in the fermentation of life, NO MATTER WHAT THE OBSTACLE will perceive personality and the ability to run, swim, ride or anything else that takes guts to overcome lady, considerate to the point of flaw.....I could go on, and this is not hype, this is FACT..........this is what *** has wasted *****, the chance to be yours! And MOST of ALL the chance for you to be HIS. He blew it, put illness aside though, it CHANGES NOTHING, glasses on or off, he blew it. In this scenario a man has only one chance........YOU LET HER GO, as hard as this may sound there is no other option.

Trust me I spent thousands of dollars to learn this. I am not ashamed to tell you that in the three years of therapy I went to weekly and to the tune of thousands of well spent dollars I do have the right to think, write and expound upon. And here must tell you I am no different than any other man, I just found it important to go through the rest of my life not blaming other people and other things for my own short comings....my own stupidity, my own choices. I am not above or beyond doing these things again, just as a recovered alcoholic is capable of slipping off the wagon. It would be simple to think you are not capable of these things, just not constructive. It is my right though.Perspective is gained in the temple of ones body and mind, you must worship and gain faith at your own alter ******. I am my maker, I am my best friend or my worse enemy, the choice is mine....ALWAYS. As you can see and feel I am no better than anyone else, my choices make me more of who I wish to be. What I have learned from past mistakes is the consequence of my actions, I do not blame others anymore. It is important to me because I LOVE myself FIRST, I am the center of my circle......I try and LOVE my children SECOND.....who ever needs my Love after this is not number three, they are embodied in the same LOVE ALL RECEIVE...it will be felt in the same vain it is meant........this is not a simple thing to accept, yet alone understand. I lean heavy on the word accept, this is lesson #3, accept your fate. Men are unable to do this in the proper context of life. The adam syndrome I suppose. Embodied in your myspace page is the heart of YOU. Desires, fears, comforts, wants, needs and most of all your love for you and your family. I listened to you bare your past to me, it was a kiss of kindness and if we had not left I would have cried ******, you moved my emotional self in ways I can not say, only feel. The closeness I felt to you was at a peak of something sacred. I would within my power do ANYTHING I COULD to help you this moment, no questions asked. This message is my right to you, my blessing to you. I think you deserve better, does that make me biased? No, I don't think so, it makes me aware. It makes me in tune and touch with the parts of you another has forgotten to recognize Forgot to nurture along. Forgot to acknowledge. Decided to take for granted. The seed of you sits fallow. Yet the soul of you surely soars. The spirit of you is surely fertile and abundant in fruit. Please don't loose track of this while this game is played at you expense. Please acknowledge the point of what unfolds. Another wants to hold you back to stay in the SAME PLACE, were he is most comfortable, it's that simple...........

I don't have any psychological training - maybe others here might be able to help - but I think this guy has serious problems mentally. Is there anyone in your W's family who might be able to help her get away from him? He may be dangerous.

For example, he was only too happy to say that you were not right for her. What would happen if she told him that he wasn't right for her either and that she has found a new love interest? I suspect that he would not be so mellow or cosmic then.

Interesting....I know he's a Jackson Browne fan from the music he puts on his myspace page.

Be warned kiddies - that is what 3 years of therapy will do to you.

Guy can't even post a coherent sentence.

Still waiting for the pros to weigh in but ... does the text of these emails strike anyone else as somewhat manic?

Away - I tried to PM you but it didn't work. PM me and I'll tell you why.

I'm trying but it says I've reached my limit. How do I change this setting?

PM's are disabled here.

You can exchange email addresses via Justuss. **edit**

do you use yahoo messenger? If so or not, my email addy is **edit**.

OK - I sent it.

I dunno. That truckload of unmitigated tripe made me feel depressive!!

I've gotta say it.

If this guy had been the OM in my situation, I don't think I could take it.

I've lashed out at my FWW plenty of times about her pathetic AP. Told her she banged a loser, etc.

I could never let it go if she had slept with a retard. She'd never hear the end of it.

I cant analyze his writing anything like schoolbus can, but I can tell you this.

He deeply believes, and/or wants others to believe, that he is extremely intelligent. Weather he claims to be formerly educated or self taught, he wants others to believe he is a scholar.

That’s what is making his paragraphs seem so incoherent to us. He is trying too hard to seem smart. In his eyes, we might just be to dumb to understand his "enlightened" thoughts.

He is trying to use his "perceived higher intelligence" to intimidate you. Don’t let it, he is dumb as a rock.

An insult to rocks, worldwide!

If I still imbibed as much as I used to, other than the occassional glass of wine, I might be able to translate his rantings (or at least think I was) but sober, sane and rational? I just don't get it. What a weirdo. Scary weirdo. Psycho weirdo. Run-as-fast-as-you-can weirdo.

Away:

Your OM in your M is Whacked.

Great, we got that. Now.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

WHAT STEPS ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE TO RECOVER YOUR M?

I've read a couple of your threads, but very little about what your going to do.

You got a mixed up WW, A step daughter, your Child, and a child with your WW< right? So, what are your plans?

I understand that you want to bash the OM. And those Emails are are as loopy as they come. And what they might be indicating is that your WW needs somebody to listen to her, as well as talk to her.

This guy WILL. Yes, he will boink her until she says "STOP" and then he will be gone, but WHAT are you going to do until then?

MB is about plans. What's yours?

LG

Sounds like "doode" is a candidate for one of those nice, cushioned rooms, a groovy coat that lets you hug the one you love best all day long, and coloring books with crayons as Christmas presents for the rest of his life.