You're amazingly in control. I don't know if I woulda been able to not LB. Good that he's gonna get his name off the lease.


Don't feel bad for him. It's his choice, right? You'd be happy to have him join you for the holidays, right? As your HUSBAND. Right? He can come home whenever he wants, as long as he commits to being your H again. So if he is alone, it's his choice.


Could be. Too bad he doesn't feel so responsible for his wife and kids. But it seems he's getting there!


Great idea!

Red body paint, candelabra hat, hit him in the face with a watermelon rind and a pumpkin pie as he walks through the door... what else?

Oh yes don't forget the bucket of patchouli oil perched precariously over the door so it dumps on him as he walks through.

TRICK OR TREAT!!!

Wwwwweeeeelllllll.....


It IS Halloween.

Be sure it's done seductively and with L.O.V.E. This IS Plan A, after all!

Don't forget the Monkey Fart!
There is a new fragrance out there-you guessed it- called "monkey fart" (go ahead, you disbelieving haters --check!) It is going to make you and your house smell great! While you are at it you can also get a bottle of that "butt naked" scent too!

If you burn them together..you have.. all together now..
"BUTT NAKED MONKEY FART!"

Any time you start wanting to kill him slowly and painfully, or at least to love bust, think of the image you just described, and you'll be able to smile and go on.

Are you sure you want to get locked into anything with WH right now? Does this restructuring make his life easier? Does it make your life easier? Not to be nosy, but sometimes the worst thing you can do while he's a WH is to help him finance anything.

This is a good point, but at this point, its either lose the house, which we bought at high time at the end of 2006 and put in my name only, so If anyone burns its going to be me. It helps me probably more than him and my kids have begged him not to move them from this home. His job has taken a bit of a dip due to the housing market since it's related to it.

We moved to this new city when we bought this home which was a difficult adjustment for them, but now they love it here.

Ok I'm sneaking on cuz he's out working on his Laptop. So he came over house was wreaking of pumpkin pie and cinnamon apple candles, I make him some lunch and him and son carve 1 of his 2 pumpkins.

K get ready{{quick cover the kids ears}} so son goes into the game room to start up his video game so him and dad can play. H and I are in the family room, I walk by him and he grabs me(sorry I can't tell you where or how or what was said cuz it's just too graphic-YES!!!!!) and we kiss really fast cuz son is calling him!

So I think there is something to the pumpkins...LMAO.....Hurry everyone go make pumpkin pie NOW!

Just think I have even painted myself red, got the candelabra out, or even don't the water melon!

K back later....

Good job. Hang in there and remember you only have to be this welcoming SIREN for another 2 weeks.

My name on the lease would have made ME blow a gasket!!!! You are doing EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!

erm, RIGHT.


I agree, I would have gone nuclear on his azz if he'd put MY name on Toad's lease.

He is gonna feel gut-punched when you go dark.

Has he made any "I wanna come home" noises?

My ex had his name on his kid's mom's lease (so the kids would have a place to live). It cost us $4500. by the time she was done, and she only paid rent for the first month. YIKES!!!

Ok how many of you want what really happened, and how many just want the tidbits. I have no problem giving you all the juicy details as long as no one freaks out on me. I really don't mind telling ya'll cuz you ALL CRACK ME THE H3LL UP! I mean really who needs TV or books when I can listen to you all.

So let me know, wouldn't mind the feedback, had a few icky's that I think I maneuvered around ok but I am a lil bit down about it so let me know how transparent you all want me to be and if the general majority say go for it then I will and if the general majority say no thanks then I won't share it all.

So??????

I WANT JUICY!!!!!

Hurry so I can go to sleep!!!

Might as well spill it, chickie, or you're liable to get :twobyfour: .

Ok Im posting it for you now Jayne241, whoever reads from this point forward if its too much for you stop reading now and back up....Read at your own risk.

He arrived about 4PM, hung out with us visited, then at one point my son went to put on a video game and I walked passed him and he grabbed me and was groping me, really if it wasn't for my son we would have had sex right there, but then son called him so he went with him for a bit to play video games.

So he just left its about 9:45. We got to have dinner alone(and pre-dinner lap dance including SF-Whoo whoo, which he said thanks he loved it and I did a great job-thank God I was really nervous!) This was a 180 for me as I never initiated in the past.


Ok so ya wanna hear the bummer, so he had a hickie on his front shoulder(which I notice during the start of the lap dance), I wanted to come unglued, but I didn't, I just continued the routine. I actually played it off real well, i think, I just looked at it during SF and I said with a smile, hmmm, not liking your hickie and continued on SF. He says oh I just banged my self at work, and kinda had a STUPID look on his face, which I played along with. I said Hmmm, doesn't look like it to me and I laughed.

We get done and go to the bathroom and get cleaned up and dressed(ok I might have LB here-you tell me) and as were getting dressed I smile and look at him and laugh and I say that is a hickie and he plays stupid and looks away and say no I hit myself at work, I a joke around and say, no way buddy OW worried and she's marking her territory and he says no my kids are here.(huh?) Then we go and have dinner together and enjoy nice conversation.

Kids get back and the evening goes by we carve the pumpkins have dessert and then he gets ready to leave and we kinda chat with each other at the door and i say, when can we do this again(SF) And he laughs and says are you enjoying having me around to visit and I say what is this a trick question(were kinda smiling and its very light hearted) I say well, kinda I mean what can I do, and he says not much I guess.(Jack a$$) LOL Sorry its that darn inner dialog again.

He says well your happy with getting SF(basically) Well he has had this kinda erection issue(not at full attention if you know what I mean just the 3 times we've gotten together during the last 4 weeks) not as well as he used to(Pre-sex with OW, that's when I really wondered and I did not know yet about the A).

So I'm kinda beating around the bush because I wanna know what the h3ll is the deal. Maybe he just is not attracted to me anymore and just isn't into me, is it nerves or what I mean what is it? I'm really kinda fishing right now and he says what are you wondering my intentions? I say well that wasn't what I wanted to ask but your welcome to volunteer that if you'd like , and I drop it and so does he.

So I finally ask, I say ok, if it wasn't for the fact that I know I'm kinda cute I would have serious self esteem problems right now and he say well what do you mean(the tone is still playful and I'm smiling) I say well your not getting hard the way you used to and it takes a while, whats the deal? He says T2L, you are beautiful and if you weren't I wouldn't do it. He says you have nothing to worry about(yeah right!)

So what do ya'll think about the night????

She smeared pumpkin flavored lipstick on his collar, and accidentally dropped the patchouli bottle (open slightly) onto the fly of his trousers and shorts. She then inadvertently responded to his complaint of an itching back by overzealously scratching it, leaving him with a number of long, raking abrasions along the length of his skin. That must be the time when her shiny red nail came off and completely disappeared so that no one will be able to find it until he returns "home", where his l'il darlin' will find it snagged inside his not-every-minute-obviously underwear. His personal, private tresses are strangely singed--apparently too close of an encounter with the shoulder candelabra--and the fire appears to have been extinguished with watermelon juice, and a certain amount of partially-masticated pulp.

Your story was probably more entertaining for YOU, but this one would have been WAY entertaining for him once he flopped at the flop's house! :MrEEk:

tl

ooo la la....

I was hoping you'd say you decided to ignore our hickey advice, and mark him yourself! As long as she'd already given him one, it couldn't hurt for you to do the same... unless he'd see through that and it would be an LB...

The comment about "No my kids are here" doesn't make a lot of sense bt if it means anything I think he meant it to say his real place is there, with you and his kids, so he's not really "her" territory. JMHO.

I truly admire your self control. You rock!

Over all I'd say it was great! Too bad about the bummer. Mark him yourself somehow... I wonder if she knows and did it on purpose.

Hmmm..... so next time she tries to give him a hickey, if he tries to stop her, she's gonna KNOW why.

Mom, her version was good, but I like yours better.

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGOMGOOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

You are hilarious, you are a great writer!

Wow he just sent a goodnight text, I say yes it was a goodnight, thanks for making the sacrifice of coming out to do pumpkins with us after working a long day, we enjoyed your company, glad your home safe.(Covered admiration for the day).

Whew, Okay regroup and refocus, tomorrow he is back for dinner and trick or treating, but he did say he'd call if he gets done early. Oh Yeah! Butttttt.....NO EXPECTATIONS!