Welcome, Skald. I hope you will start a thread and post on it because otherwise it gets confusing. Just the fact that you are posting here gives me lots of hope, because most waywards won't post. Hopefully we can help you get the hang of MB so that you and your wife can enjoy a marriage that is better than before.

drgnfly,

I see now what your H meant when he said that moving now would involve great sacrifice for you. It's not just quitting a "job" for you, and you fear you could not find comparable employment elsewhere.

I guess you have to weigh the risks, don't you?

I'm guessing you will know in a couple of months which sacrifice is harder to bear.

Maybe moving to a nearby town would help, but whether you move or not, I think a NC letter is in order. If she still doesn't back off, it's time for a restraining order.

Whatever you do about your living arrangements, whether it's small steps or one grand move, use the POJA to get there!

RHW

RHW,

We're pretty certain that she's tried to call him at work today. They were both "private numbers" on the caller id and the caller hung up as soon as somebody besides H answered. We're wondering if there's a common time frame for the OP to give up. Is that part of the three weeks withdrawal period? Does it take that long for them to realize too and come to terms with it? Or could this go on indefinitely? I know OWH said that she will not give up easily, so we've been prepared for this.

About the letter of NC. Since he already initiated NC, wouldn't sending a letter violate that?

We were talking last night and we decided to start posting in the other forums dealing with conflict, ENs, negotiations and such. The stronger we make our marriage, the further away the A gets pushed. If we're meeting each others needs and eliminating the LBs, then there's no need to go elsewhere to get them.

Thank you for being here.

drgnfly

Hi drgnfly,

SO good you have support at H's workplace! And since HE dumped HER, it's going to take a while to get rid of her. ("Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...") Yep, she'll have to go through withdrawal too, so it could be a while. (Our OW pestered my FWH for SIX MONTHS after he broke it off. Talk about a sore loser. But I can laugh NOW.)

As I remember, your H broke off contact only recently...and OW is still intruding, so maybe that "reinforcement" is necessary. Of course, once some time has gone by, NC letters make no sense. Strike while the iron's hot, I say.

Glad to see you broadening your involvement. Hope to run into you on another forum!

Best wishes to you, drgnfly and skald.

Right Here Waiting