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Joined: Sep 2003
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It has been several years since I went through all of this, so the memories are starting to fade - thankfully.
But I do recall that the first time my boys met OW #1 they said she was trying to act like a teenager. She was about 10 years younger than WxH, so apparantly she wanted to be their "friend"
It didn't work

in the beginning, WxH claimed that he wanted the boys with him more often so he could have his "parenting time" They spent 2 weekends w/ him and OW#1. That was it. It was only a few months later that the R ended.

Trust me, as the mother of his children you will always be a threat to her.

Hang in there sister. You are going to be just fine.


Married 18 years
D Day June 25, 2003
Divorced December 17, 2003

Newly married to a wonderful man!
Joined: Aug 2007
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Thank you guys for the support and advice. This site and everybody here has been such a blessing. To know I'm not the only one dealing with all this.

I know I'll get thru it. It'll be tough having my kids around her. But I know it won't be that often, and hopefully they'll break up soon. Reality has to be setting in for WH.

Joined: Aug 2007
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My kids haven't met OW yet, but I think they will in a couple of weeks. XWH drops them off today and my daughter says "have you seen XXXXX?" He actually sent my kids home with several pictures of him and OW, apprantly on some vacation together.

I just don't understand why he'd do something like that. And then my daughter says OW is gonna wait in the car next time XWH picks them up. I told my kids she will never be welcome at our home, not even in the driveway. So I won't be letting child exchanges happen at my house anymore.

It just makes me angry, and just when I think I'm becoming indifferent to it all. (I threw the pictures away, and called him and said that it was wrong and disrespectful and don't do it again.)

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I guess the weekend with XWH and OW went ok. I can't even bring myself to ask my kids about it. Of course, they walked in with lots of new toys and clothes. My daughter said XWH wants to take them to Disneyworld. Why is it that WS's will do things with the OP that they'd never do with their family?

Hearing that kind of stuff really stings. And I can't imagine there'll ever be a day that it won't.

Joined: Oct 2008
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Quote
Why is it that WS's will do things with the OP that they'd never do with their family?

One word: Guilt. They think they can buy their way out of it.


Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)
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XH sends me an email about pick-ups and drop-offs. He's bringing the OW with him. I won't let her step foot in my driveway. So now he can't figure out what to do.

I wanted to say, "Leave her on the street corner where she belongs."

My SIL used to work with him and she told me a couple of things over the weekend that triggered me. That he used to talk about how hot my sister is all the time. And another coworker was bragging how she slept with him.

He's a total mess. But these things are still a stab in the heart.

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He refuses to not bring OW with him. He told me I need to find an "acceptable solution."

I really feel like I should hold my ground about her never coming to my house.

I don't even like my ex coming here. My one request was that she never come to my home. And if I let them cross that boundary, then what? Or am I just fighting the inevitable?

Joined: Jun 2008
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Stand firm. There is no reason to bring his tramp to your house. The current arrangement is an "acceptable solution" and YOU don't have to appease him. Let him stew. At some point maybe she will get sick of sitting in the car and stay home or dump him. Do not give in to his whining.


BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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