Do you still harbor any hopes of reconciliation? If so, you'll probably want to look into Plan B before your Love Bank drains away completely...

I'm sure, though, that it must be really tough to see the woman you loved again, as opposed to the WW, and NOT miss her badly...

This is all such a waste... because the odds are very good she won't be with OM a year from now... and she will have ruined your marriage, her kid's family, and her life... for nothing.

Hey, don't hex SIL's marriage now.

WW anger issues???

I'm not exactly thrilled that she has to experience the presence of OM. Can this be fixed?


She may be just trying to sweeten you up. Nevertheless, take your opportunities where you can.

Are you going to keep us in the dark as to the Christmas arrangements, or are you building up suspense?

SInce everyone has been bugging me about X-Mas, here it is as of this morning:

12/24: with her
12/25, 12/26: With me. She will drop the kids off at 10am on the 25th.

Sad thing is she told me today she did not have the money to buy the kids any presents (but she does have money to feed OM and buy his liquor and cigs.) Nice.

Think about this for a second. How is that "sad"?? Are you providing for your kids' Christmas? So, if she doesnt, wont that put greater strain on the situation she has created for herself?

I think the fact that she cant do it is a good thing, considering where you are at. She wont like it. She'll remember the Christmas mornings before. She will know that Christmas at the family home (your house) will be the same as usual...as the kids expect.

I think, for the long term health of your marriage, family and kids...this is probably a good thing!

Please excuse the thread jack.

Hi MM,

I haven't seen you around these parts in a long time.

How about an update. I hope you and yours are enjoying the Christmas season.

God Bless,

JL

We went to the bankruptcy attorney yesterday. All I can say is WOW! Turns out, the little red car that OM has been driving was bought by WW. The story she has spun for the last two months was OM's mother bought him the car.

In other news, Sunday night she said she was going to turn in her new truck. Last night she said she was going to turn in the little red car.

Wow indeed! How did she manage to get that to fly under the radar?

Are there any legal repercussions to the fraud?

It always shocks me the things that WS's will lie about. They lie even when there is nothing to hide. I'm glad you are in a place now where things are starting to get straightened out. It could be a long road still, though.

Hmm, can you register this vehicle as another taxable item for OM's list?

Two new cars... aren't they both considered marital assets, then? And imagine is right - add that to OM's tax bill!

Hi all, since there's a lot of activity today on other threads around WS moving out with kids, etc, I have a couple of questions for the veterans on the board around custody.

Here's a summary of my sitch in regards to the kids:

- forced out of the house on 8/19 because of a bogus protection order

- had to find an apartment for myself.

- WW forced a continuance on the protection hearing until 9/24 and gave me every other weekend visitation

- Had every other weekend visitation until December.

- Agreed and filed with the courts a shared 50/50 custody arrangement on 12/5.

- Maritial home is going to be sold so WW will have to move anyways

RIght now, WW is trying to find a farm to rent somewhere in PA. The problem is anyplace that she can remotely afford will be too far away for the 50/50 shared or anything but every other weekend to work.

Since she would be moving out of state before the divorce is final, what are my options to keep my shared custody? Just so you know, I sent a similar question to my Lawyer.

Given your WW's recent actions and evidence of mental instability, I would be working on gaining primary custody if I were you. I presume you are staying in the apartment you have already rented? This will add to the stability you can provide the children. I would have this ready before she has made any move.

I agree that you should be seeking primary custody. Given her instability, time in a mental hospital for anger issues, and her proven track record of filing bogus protection orders against you - which indicates a willingness to lie to the courts in order to prevent you from having a relationship with your kids - I'd say you'd have a good case for primary custody.

Your kids need you and the stability you provide. They don't need to be around WW and her alcoholic, con-artist OM.

BTW, is OM still around the kids? You'd said earlier that was one condition you insisted on before you'd talk to WW. Is that in force?

Most states won't allow one parent to take children out of the state without permission of the other parent. She will have to stay local. You can write in a mile radius as well.

My attorney got back to me today. If she moves out of state, the courts will not look favorably at all on her taking the kids out of state since we have shared custody. What this means is it would be up to her to make the shared custody work. Or, she can file a motion to modify custody / visitation but she would be really rolling the dice due to her behavior over the last few months.

Just make sure she doesn't take the kids out of state first before custody arrangements are determined. In my OWH's sitch, OW moved first, then informed him. The judge gave her a lecture that what she did was wrong, but then let her keep DD anyway since moving her back would be further disruption.

JL,

Good to hear from you. I will send an update shortly! Hope yours had a great Christmas also!

I have one call on this...she doesnt get to take the kids out of the state! Period. Do not agree to the kids living out of state. She either stays, or she goes!

Check out what I went thru in my sitch. I got primary custody the first time, and then shared custody (with me having most of the time with the kids) the second time.

But the issue was that the troll wanted my wife to move to Florida (he actually wanted her to leave the kids). She was never going to leave the kids! And not be able to see them. So, it was another wedge there.

so, make it hard on her and him. Defend your family and your kids. If your wife pulls her head out, she will thank you later!!

For me, out of state can mean a bunch of things - I live and work on the DE-PA border. Better schools in PA - if WW moves to a "border" town, no problem. The issue is she is looking at places 90 minutes away. If that's tthe case, she will have to go through the courts. With her mental instablility and OM's arrest record, good luck...

And if you allow her to let them be one foot out of state, what is there to keep her from moving to Pittsburg? Not one inch, my man! Those kids do not leave the state of Delaware. This is a boundary you need to defend!