"It's over, she want's a divorce"

It's over because you will not fight for her. You refuse to man up and not let fear control you. You start to expose then you stop finishing exposure.

As been stated before you need to expose. So WW gets mad and bangs the OM. Oh wait she is already doing that. She wants to leave you for OM. Oh wait she was already doing that.

Expose the hell out of her. At least if she does not come back everyone will know that she is a cheater.

Monc,

What makes this woman so special that you are willing to tolerate this kind of abuse from her? What is it about her that is so fantastic that you're willing to put up with cheating when you have no kids with her.

Seriously, would you ever be comfortable having kids with this woman after what she's done to you?

You're hanging on to this scum of a woman because you don't know any better. You can do better than a cheater and you deserve better than this.

The second you accept this, the better you will be. What makes you think you deserve this treatment?

You want scraps of affection from her, her family, and others.

Is your self esteem that low?

NO WOMAN is worth being treated this way.

Contact a lawyer and ask about an Alienation of Affection lawsuit against OM and file for divorce on the grounds of adultery.

Trust me when I tell you that the women out here are fabulous and that once you understand this that you will never tolerate an ounce of drama from a cheater with no morals who isn't worth a word out of your mouth or one tear on your part.

Taking that kind of attitude with her will make her respect you more, but you won't care since her opinion of you doesn't matter anymore than that of the local hooker working the corner down the street.

Sounds harsh, but that's the reality.

You know what... I think my WW already spun her story to everyone a month ago. That is why everyone is against me. I just read stuff where she is telling family that she thinks she married to young.

She believes this effort is trying to destroy every bit of happiness she's building...she's already vilifying me to everyone.

What's the point - so she can have more time to "spin" her story properly before talking to them?

Did you expect anything else?

That's why Exposure needs to be done as early as possible, to as wide an audience as possible, before the waywards have time and opportunity to give their own "spin".

Doesn't help me now.

Lets see what kind of flack the OM mother gives him.

She's telling everyone that she's been giving ME chances when she cheated. Wow.

So how do you manage the WW when they are acting like you are ruining all their happiness?

That [censored] storm keeps paralyzing me.

The New York trip is off and she didn't tell me. And is going to use the money to still go.

She IS planning on taking the OM with her I think.

She's being vile...wtf am I wanting this for?

My WW is getting a restraining order on me now for calling the OM mother.

Are you really that gullible?

I can't see her succeeding. I've made no threats. I know, I'm not being gullible, but she does do what she say's she's going to do.

Like her wedding vows?!?!

Good point.

Monc, have you exposed on Facebook yet? Why not?

I thought I'd go back and bring up some of the stuff that's gone on your thread, since you seem to have no fortitude. OM works at his mom's restaurant, right? If I were you, I'd be at that restaurant, telling the customers and the workers what OM is doing with your wife. I'd be posting ads in their local paper saying call me and ask me about this restaurant's owner's son. I'd be talking to him in public about scr&wing your wife! I'd be making his life miserable so he'll leave her alone. I'd be moving BACK into your own home and making HER leave.

Actually, at your age, I'd kick her to the curb and find a woman who deserves you, who doesn't lie, cheat, and make you out to be a jerk.

*sigh*

Anyway, here is some of your earlier (3 days ago, and you're already 'done') stuff:
That weekend Feb 7th she went to see her sister Claire who she told everything apparently.
Obviously not.
I immediately turned around and put all our money back into the bank.
Since then she has held that over my head as being a greater crime than her infidelity.
GO BACK AND CLOSE OUT THE ACCOUNTS! BEFORE SHE MOVES THE MONEY TO HER OWN ACCOUNT! This is NOT your wife, it’s a WW! An alien!
I've read them and tried them...but she just keeps going further and further away. She won't work with me at all outside of counseling. Sometimes she talks to me but she only finds reason to get angry when I confront her failings.
You haven’t read it all if you don’t know you that it does NO GOOD to talk to her until she has NO with other man and has been through withdrawal.
What is plan A exactly?
How can you say you’ve read everything if you don’t even know what Plan A is?
Everyone tells me that this Exposure thing will just make it worse...
Everyone who knows her and is afraid of her temper…NOT everyone who has had experience with affairs and has seen them dissipate when exposed.
People I've told so far about this idea is everyone.
You said this Saturday, and today you say you’ve told 3 cousins. Which is it? Have you told her best friend? Her other friends? Sisters? Brothers? Aunts? Uncles? Coworkers? Boss? His boss? His brothers and sisters?
How DEEP should I go? Cause Facebook literally exposes the entire family extended and all.
Most definitely do Facebook, then, if it tells everyone at once. You are saving her from herself by exposing. She is NOT herself right now. If you can get her away from OM, she can withdraw and return to her former self, the one you fell in love with.
I'll need to steal her phone to get the super list of numbers.
So get it.
I should name the OM to everyone too right?
H&ll yeah. Make sure he can’t do this to some other poor schlub’s wife!
Well I have no means to financially cut her off. Everything car, phone and such are in her name.
But you have access to your bank accounts. Do NOT let her withdraw from those accounts!
As I've said two family members know...an Aunt and uncle.
Is that good enough for now in terms of exposure?
Are you insane? No mother, father, sister, brother, best friend? What are you thinking?!
they are making me feel that if I tell everyone it'll only leave her permanently shamed in the family...that everyone will always look at her as the adulterer.
Now I KNOW you haven’t read everything here. When she leaves OM and goes through withdrawal, she learns shame and becomes repentant, and she asks her family for forgiveness and they forgive her and you have a better marriage than you had before.
I do know the other man's mother would castrate him for his current actions. The other mans mother had apparently said often that he'd try and hit on my wife and they'd cheat. Seriously. And look where I am for not listening to HIS mother?
Then TELL HER! And keep telling her so she'll tell her son to leave your wife alone!
What is frustrating is my wayward wife's father won't support this. I know he won't because it means that his wife would have to learn of my wife's actions. So...because of that I am forced to watch my wife walk away from me, because I can't disrespect him.
Bullchit! So you will GIVE UP your marriage just so you don’t disrespect your FIL? Do you think he will respect you? No!
Not meeting there I'm pretty damn sure. It's her Alumni college event.
I'm certain of that due to evidence.
And I’m certain he has already booked a room near hers so they can spend the evenings together when she leaves the event.
Told her it was just to certify a claim that his mother already knew... Which I believe is not true.
She seemed distraught.
Because she’s been lying to you. His mother does NOT know. Have you called her yet? Why not? She should be the ABSOLUTE FIRST person you call, as you said earlier.
I told the mom and she did the same thing...said stop.
They are why your wife feels entitled to scr&w other men – they have taught her entitlement – everything is for poor sweet daughter. Ugh! Ignore them and call HIS MOM again!
I want ONE of you to link somewhere on this site where it talks about revealing to everyone around the wayward wife.
I can't find it. I find about revealing the affair itself but nothing about total exposure.
Go back and read the first 5 pages of your thread. We already posted that information. You ignored it.

Have you frozen your bank accounts yet?

Have you moved back into your own home?

Have you inconvenienced her A in any other way?

Then you SHOULD just walk away, if you're not willing to fight for this marriage.

Sorry, I'm on xanax so my memory is [censored] for short term.

Frankly, I agree with catperson and baron. Can you imagine having children with this woman and going through this with 3 little children in tow? Cut your losses and get out while the getting is good. You said yourself she doesn't change her mind and is intent on divorce. Why not take her at her word and just move on?