really

A woman who cheats on her H is a skank so obviously a person who hits on such a married woman believes [rightly or wrongly] that she will be skank with him. Therefore, when a man hits on a married woman he is presuming [hoping] she is a skank and he will get lucky. To be treated as a SKANK is an INSULT.

Clarity. Thank you

The new me is insulted!

Something every mother should teach her daughter so she doesn't grow up being "flattered" that married men find her HHOOOOOOOOTTT!

point very much noted

What's the old saying about men who proposition a female will get slapped 99 out of 100 times?

It is never a compliment, and chances are good that these guys do it to many, many women, so don't consider it "special" or "flattering".

haha if a guy hits on a girl at a bar....he's basically wearing a sign that says free drinks....he's usually used for a few drinks and left....Seen it....done it in my single days. Men at bars are really not worth much more than that.

*ducks on coming flying objects*

Miss M,

True, I'm always being silly. And thank you for the reassurance - I like to think of myself as a moral person...now. However, I wasn't joking. For years (most of my marriage, actually) I was always "involved" with other men somehow. Lunches, flirtatious (work!) emails, playful at the bar or when we'd have "friends" over, etc. In fact, often STBXH would encourage it! His friends would hit me on or love-tap me or the like. He'd never do the same, with their wives or GFs, but I know he was likely inappropriate while away from me, which was quite often, as he was/is a "weekend drinker". I guess that was his justification. And for years, I went along with/accepted/allowed it!

I DO also look forward to trying again. Because now I AM moral. If only I could have a do-over. How much better off my kids would be!

Sorry for the T/J. I was skanky. I didn't realize it, but I do now. It's OK, I'm reformed.

Ok everything I said got twisted one way or another. I have read your definitions. And I can say that I have never flirted with anyone other than my husband with the attention to have sex with them. Maybe I was just being nice by your definition, but it was never with the intention to "get my skank on." I am not a skank and never have been. But yes I am friendly with almost everyone I run into contact with. I accept compliments by those who give them, because otherwise that would make me rude. I am not going to lock myself up in my home just because I am friendly and people want to be friendly with me. That is ridiculous! I have friends that are married and we are all friendly with each other, because we know that we all have self control. There is no one other than my husband who's opinion that really matters to me. But that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate some one else giving me a compliment or something like that. Its insane!

So how do you know if you are flirting then right?
If you wouldn't behave in that certain way with your spouse or OP's spouse present, it's flirting.

A wedding ring can be an invitation to morally inept people who want ONS's, no commitment, just a quick roll in the hay.

I am most definitely insulted, and feel almost sleazy when any guy hits on me. It makes me question, am I giving off some sort of vibe to these jerks ???? That's just me though.

Now there's a phrase...get my skank on. LOL

Very good one ML.

GL, there is a huge difference between being friendly and FLIRTING. My suggestion would that if someone CANNOT TELL THE DIFFERENCE, then they probably should stay home and not operate vehicles or be about in public.

However, I suspect most people do know the difference.

Thankee, Rock..

Despite what some of you believe, I wouldn't act any different if their spouse was there or not. And I have never had anyone uncomfortable with me or the way I behave. So maybe I'm not flirting.

[/quote]
A wedding ring can be an invitation to morally inept people who want ONS's, no commitment, just a quick roll in the hay.

I am most definitely insulted, and feel almost sleazy when any guy hits on me. It makes me question, am I giving off some sort of vibe to these jerks ???? That's just me though.

[/quote]
I feel quite opposite than you. Why should you feel dirty if someone is hitting on you? What did you do wrong? But that's just me. If I get hit on by someone, like a couple of days ago I was out with my son and some random guy in my complex said that he see's me out with my boy every day. And then he said he likes my tattoo which is on my lower back by my hip, which is usually covered by my shirt, but sometimes my shirt comes up and you can see it. And how does a compliment on my tattoo make me the bad guy? I told the guy thank you and nice to meet you and kept walking.

Mel,

Have you left the keyboard to hit the girl's room yet, today? Lol!!

I flirt with disaster.

Flirting with another person, while your spouse is not with you, is like wearing a flashing neon sign on your forehead that says:

"Im Available."

It will most often be misinterpreted be OP as just that, and in the right set of circumstances,(ie,alcohol or other) it could turn out to be very true. Hence, the ONS.

Very dangerous and slipery slope indeed for a married person.

All Blessings,
Jerry

OK, MS, is this an admission that being observant is not your strong suit? I went on 2 appointments, met a friend for lunch and then went shopping for hours!

I know about Blackberry technology!!!

Gl, I think this is the issue for you. You may not know the difference between flirting and just common friendliness. What you describe here is not flirting, it is just a compliment. No one has ever said you were a "bad guy" for recieving a compliment so I have no idea what that is about.

Don't own one! Like I said, powers of observation.......