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Hi Sad, that is so very sweet and kind of you. Thank you.
My situation is changing, but so does all of ours. We just don't know what the changes mean.
Thank you for keeping my family, my WH and me in your prayers. I truly believe in the power of prayer and appreciate your kindness so much.
Be good to yourself...
Last edited by QueeniesAdventures; 04/07/09 11:53 PM.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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Happy Pesach, Queenie...
Diaynu!
Mark
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Love your new thread title QueenieA
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage ********************* “In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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A conversation is just that. Don't bank on anything. Keep following God and let h go.
He's not back. He's not doing the work needed to come back. Consider him still toxic until....he earns even a smattering of respect.
I've been there. I've sat in the counselor's office and heard x ask for another chance but I never saw him do the work. I guess I'm being a naysayer because I've ridden the hope roller coaster. I know how is stinks.
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Swung by to say HAPPY PASSOVER!!!! Cuz its Passover in Japan now. heheh
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Queenie,
Just stopping by to catch up a bit and say hello!
I, too, love your new thread title!
You are indeed a new woman who continues to amaze me. Keep up the great work. Keep focus on you and on what G-d wants for you. Everything else will fall into place when, where, and how it should.
{{{{{QUEENIE}}}}}
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Happy Pesach Mojo, how the heck are you? I miss you so much. Tell us how you are.
Bugs m'lady. Sounds like life is proceeding along and you are right in the thick of it. Good for you. I wasn't kidding when I said once, WWBD is how I look at things that happen. I draw so much comfort from your walk in this. You had shown me what a true GODDESS is and DOES and I thank you.
I'm glad you all like the new name. I felt it was time.
Cinders, I am NOT getting my hopes up. I'm not making any more of this than what is simply was ONE MOMENT, ONE TINY CONVERSATION. You at least got a request to get a chance. I haven't even gotten that. I've gotten one compliment and one mention of action. Did he do it, don't know. The check was posted on Monday so he didn't have any impact. I'm still behind a month and my bills. Well I do what I can and call it good.
His heart is hardened for whatever reasons that are his. I don't make any assumptions of knowing what he thinks. That's because I don't know this man.
Chag Sameach Mark, Dayenu.
Its so weird what are the littlest triggers. I used to have 25 friends over for the first night seder, where my husband was at the head of the table and led the seder. This year I probably won't even make one because of schedules. I did go to the store and pick up some cheap matzah and other stuff, so I am good to go on food. Plus I do get to make the charoset and matzah ball soup for my temple's seder tomorrow night. So at least that need is covered. LOL
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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My heart is restless tonight and I'm working through some icky stuff for myself so I can't really sleep. I got tired of tossing and turning and went on my work email and posted on the thread on MB sisterhood a lovely letter.
It's weird, I just had this thought that I feel like a man in braveheart who kept getting hit and kept standing up and was finally victorious. I just don't know when that victory comes or what that victory will be about.
Shabbat Shalom and Happy almost Weekend everyone....
Last edited by QueeniesAdventures; 04/10/09 07:37 AM.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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Queenie, hugs to you. Wanted to say Happy Passover. A very good friend from highschool that I have known forever went in for surgery for breast cancer and she is home now getting ready for the chemo/radiation and all she could talk about was how she missed Passover and all the food she would make. She actually made me laugh. Amazing the strength of people in times of crisis. Even though our WH are messed up we have our health and we have support. Take care and following your thread and journey.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Hi Hope,
I'm glad you stopped by. The urge to do something bug is getting the better of me. I wanted to bring WH some soup and charoset along with a box of matzah and macaroons, but I called Looking4 and she helped me see the downside to it.
UGH... I do better when I work during the day, vs too much time on my hands.
How is your friend doing?
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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Hi Queenie my love, its nearly been 12 months since you reached out to me. I just wanted to say I will always remember it.
You amaze me. Thank you for being there.
FBW (me) FWH (him) d-day#1 8th Mar 08 d-day#2 June 08 RECOVERED!
TIME!
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I will ALWAYS be here with you and next to you in your heart.
We reached out to each other and it's been an honor getting to know you this year and watch your marriage recover.
I love you
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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Hi Queenie!
love the new name LOL... I was so pleased to hear that WH had left OW....I always remember you constantly telling me "that we don't know whats happening on the other side'....I keep you in my prayers...
I understand your pain when the WH has time for the kids and not you.... Hang in there,its not over yet!!!
BS;ME43,WH45 DS19,DS16 DDay:6Dec06 WH left12Dec06 DIV:3Dec08 WH marries OW 21days later!
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HOPE Its awesome to see you. I was just thinking about you the other night. How are you? I don't know what happened over there except he says he couldn't live the mistake anymore. Now since he was paying all the bills, she left. I am curious if she has found another sugar daddy, but who knows. :crosseyedcrazy:
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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I'm doing ok.... I don't have much contact with him excwpt to do with the kids...the boys say he is stressed about money....
I was doing really well untill a few days ago.My DS19 has decided to work with his dad in the shop.This means he won't be doing nature conservation which was his passion.He is moving in with his dad today...as its closer to the shop. I was devestated..I feel as though he has destroyed our marriage and now his seperating the boys too. DS19 says he just wants to try working with his dad.Another big thing drawing him there is that his dad lives 2 roads away from his girlfriend!!
I have told my X that I would still take him back and that I pray for him...I got no comment....
Anyway,I follow "charlynne cares" and her ways....
I don't post anymore cos I really don't have anything to report...also, I don't think it would be good of me to bad mouth my X everytime he does something stupid or hurtful...
If my situation changes I will definitely be back here.... Please know that I always check in on you and am praying for you.... To cut costs,I don't have internet access at home anymore only at work.Its difficult to log on in my normal hours so I will check in when I'm working extra shifts.
Oh, yesterday I had a car accident near my X's house, as I had fetched my boys..A tourist in front of me decided to come to a sudden holt in a circle!!!This was his second accident while holidaying here!! DS19 automatically phoned his dad who came in a split second.The old husband was back...caring and helpful....offered to get the broken part (front light cover) for me... he phoned later to see if we were ok too. We had a good chat and he is coming to look at my pool as I have a leak somewhere.
I suppose a bit of plan A can't harm hey!!! I am still hurting though .... Its all in Gods Hands now.... Stay well.....
BS;ME43,WH45 DS19,DS16 DDay:6Dec06 WH left12Dec06 DIV:3Dec08 WH marries OW 21days later!
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HI queen, I was just stopping by to say hi! Thinking about you and Happy Easter! Love the new name BTW!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
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Hi Queenie, well Easter is over. It was good having my neighbors over but it really had some rough patches. My friend is doing good and trying to stay positive.
I, like you, wanted to do something for WH also. Bring him some lasagna at work tomorrow - something-- but the safest route it to do nothing. I struggle every day with this. I keep forgetting he is an alien. I keep looking for my old H. Wonder if he will ever surface again.
Hopenpray, I also read charleynecares. It keeps me going some days and I pray for that type of faith.
Queenie, stay strong.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Hopenpray, I'm so glad you gave me an update. I think about you so often and miss you so very much. We have truly been through alot together. We haven't gotten what we wanted, but for whatever reason we remain faithful to G-d. And this is a good thing.
{{{{{{{{{{HOPE3343}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm so sorry you are having a bad day. I have to admit, I spent most of the day in a very bad way, woke up at 6 am, cried for almost two hours, went back to bed, woke up at noon and basically can't get out of my funk.
I have spent almost the entire afternoon reading SVT's thread and honestly I get sick to my stomach when I think about the pain that people feel and go through. And yes, I'm so jealous. It seems that no matter how hard I pray and hope, I'm not going to get that chance to make life better for my H.
I too subscribe to Charlene Cares and I struggle horribly wondering if shutting him off is the best thing to do. I don't honestly know. Today when I came home from my AA meeting I thought maybe I should just give up and be friends with him.
How frickin pitiful that I am willing to get any scrape from him. I don't know why, but I am. I am a fighter, I'm a survivor, I've been at this for almost two years and at least three years WH hasn't met any of MY needs and here I am at square one, weakened in heart and breaking inside because I miss the man I love.
Mimi doesn't come around here much anymore. I promised her once I wouldn't do anything to myself. I honestly pray to G-d that I don't. I'm so tired of missing him. I'm so tired of hoping for what.... I'm so sorry everyone. I have really tried to become that person you all believed existed but today, I'm beaten. I want it to end. The pain in my heart, the sadness in my soul. I almost wish I don't wake up anymore. Then G-d can give me the answers that I so desperately want.
But then I remember my babies, even though they are teenager monsters today and I just can't give up on them until they are old enough to be without me.
I'm so angry at myself. Vladi, please don't take any shots at me, I'm not in the frame of mind. I can't shake this awful feeling that WH is with OW. Johnstwin, told me to give my love to G-d as a sacrifice and to hold it and cherish it and to prepare me for what he needs. I'm sure I'll bounce back. I'm just down. Holidays are so hard for me. Why did G-d make me feel. Why can't I just stop feeling...
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
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No advice... I haven't read your whole thread... just {{{{{{{{{{{{Queenie}}}}}}}}}}} Don't give up on God... he always shows... sometimes not until the 11th hour though... I will add you to my prayers tonight... and right now.. ALMIGHTY GOD... Please come to Queenie. Send the Holy Spirit to calm her and comfort her... You can fix her marriage Lord... it would be NOTHING for you....She has fought the fight for so long Lord God...she is weary...carry her Lord...Make what is wrong right again... But Lord... we offer this Marriage up to YOUR wisdom LORD and to YOUR time... But GOD.. please come quickly...Please come quickly... CRUSH THE ENEMY LORD CRUSH HIM GOD Father and cast his influence over this marriage into the sea.... In Jesus' MIGHTY name we pray..... GOoD Luck and Prayers... Frank
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Hope... Bring him some lasagna at work tomorrow - even aliens have to eat...
Frank
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