Hi all. Thanks for stopping by.

Season’s over. We had a great game on the road for 3-quarters last Friday night. The team we played had 7-seniors out of the 11 in uniform. We started 1-senior, 2-juniors, one sophomore and Chuck the freshman. Our only subs were 4-sophomores and another freshman.

They took the first quarter 15-12. We outscored them 13-12 in the second still giving them a 27-25 edge at halftime. Last time we played them in our gym the halftime score was 37-14.

We tied them up twice during the 3rd quarter but it ended with us down 44-40. This was not supposed to be happening. Their coach looked exasperated and yelled out to his team, “They’re not going away ladies.”

Then in the 4th quarter, his seniors had finally had enough. The PT Boats suddenly found themselves surrounded by five pissed off Iowa Class battleships, 16” guns a blazin. And the PT-Boats had used most of their torpedoes. Can you say dominated? Sure, I knew you could.

With a nice comfortable lead he finally pulled his seniors one at a time for their last announcement and cheer from the home crowd. And then for a couple minutes everyone in the gym got the trailer preview of next season. The PT-Boats versus The Model 6604 1976 2-stroke smoking blue cloud Evinrude powered bass boats. Can you say dominated? Sure, I knew you could.

Right at the end of the game our lone senior tied up the ball with their only big junior they will have for next year and shook her around like a Doberman with a bunny. When it was over our B turned around and walked to the ref with the ball on her hip while their great hope of next year lay sprawled on the floor looking like she might cry.

Chuck had 6-points, one bucket (a terrific pick-pocket steal off their point for a layup at the end) and went 4 of 6 from the line. Another solid game from her.

The kids were very pumped after the game in the locker room and are already talking about next year. The parents were beaming and talking about next year.

Also, our Level 3 team won a pretty close exciting game Saturday. They finished the season with a 13-6 record and are the first winning level 3 girls team in the history of our school. The L3 had never beaten the L3 team they played in the history of the school. Good stuff. A very happy team.

DD21’s JV team kind of melted down and got hammered pretty hard Saturday. JV’s all, basically have the middle child syndrome. L3 is Cindy. JV is Jan. Varsity is Marsha. “It’s not fair! Marsha! Marsha! Marsha!”

Of all the coaches, DD is probably most happy this season is over.

It will be weird to be home by 5:15 tonight. Fortunately I have about 1,123 projects around the house that have been neglected for about 6-months. Time to get to work.

Come on Spring!

What up, Coach?

Anything new to share? Has Bulldozer Barn been demolished yet?

Fox

Two Years Ago Today:





Happy Birthday Old Thread!


If I had not seen Cat's post on DNU1's thread, I would not even remembered it today.

So to all the betrayed out there facing the last days of their marriage, you're going to be okay. You really are.

The worst injury you will ever receive, from the person you trusted most on Earth, does heal.

My best advice is to Plan B your WX as dark as you can. Children make it tougher, but don’t use that as a crutch. You can still be very dark even with kids.

I have had no contact with Wayzilla for over 22-months. What a blessing.

Don’t dwell on the Karma Bus. It moves at its own speed on its own schedule. In truth, it may never come. It doesn’t really matter.

You’re the one who has grown and learned and have a real future. It will be as bright as you make it.

YEAH YOU RIGHT!!

I think you could be the poster child for what Personal Recovery looks like, Chrisner. Congratulations on moving on and living well...with class and a great sense humor.

Thanks for this post Chrisner. My anniversary (36 yrs) is in a couple of weeks and my D should be coming soon. Wow, I'm 2 1/2 yrs past dday now, and I think I just realized that I will probably be OK. I don't think any of us thought that our marriages would really end, but here we are. I haven't spoken to WH in 19 months. And yes, the darkest Plan B that you can do is the best. I've gotten to the point where I really wouldn't have anything to say to him anyway......

I am glad to hear this Chai. I admire a lot of people here but you are right at the top. After all you have been through and are still standing leaves me pretty secure in the prediction that you will make it just fine.

My D-Day was Thanksgiving of 2006 and your was Christmas of 2006. A nasty diseased raccoon pooped all over the turkeys that year huh?




Yep, the imaginary conversations of a showdown where you verbally whip their sorry wayward [censored] just........fade to black.

It's pointless and life is to short.

Take care Chai.

Happy Mother's Day, chrisner. You are the one that gets the good wishes and EARNED them.

For the longest time, I wanted that Karma bus to ram the Z into oblivion, even up until recently. My very first Dday was way back in July '05. That seems a million years ago, now. What goes around does come around, and not because of some karmic vehicle. It's usually just a product of choices, IMO. Poor ones, especially those made hastily, tend to bring the heaviest price.

I actually find it to be all too easy to whip wayward [censored], since I've got such a huge arsenal. I just don't have the stomach for it, especially since I share young child with this person. It's energy that I could put toward something positive.

The Z f'd up, and I believe he now knows it, even though I think he just feels sorry for himself. That's good enough for me. Maybe he'll learn something. I dunno, that's not my job...

I miss your posts on coaching. How are things this season? How is DD?

Hi HTLD.

You had to dig pretty deep to find this goofy old thread. Did you do a search for �thongs� and find it?

I have only been lurking around here every few days or so occasionally returning like a moth to the flame. The great MB purge lost the events of the death of my sister and the support I received here that was very valuable to me. After that I kind of started my inevitable �fade to black� from MB. There are a few stories (HH, Hope, Chai and a couple others) I want to see to their conclusion and an occasional interesting �theory� thread here I so I check in now and then.

DD22 is doing pretty good. She is still in school getting good grades and working every hour she can. The stressed life of a college student. She has pretty limited contact with her mother as Wayzilla now lives with Gollum and works for him in the �ol western wear store. DD22 and I almost never speak of her anymore. Wayzilla has finally ceased all attempts to probe my post marriage Plan B.

DD�s relationship with her grandparents has improved quite a bit since the day DGS and I worked together with them to help move DD to her new place. This is good. I think Wayzilla�s parents have come to a stark new place regarding her adultery. I exchanged Christmas cards with her parents and sisters for the first time since the divorce and got a birthday card from all of them as well. This is good too.

The team had a great 61-45 league win last night on the road and we have seven tough games to go. Chuck played so hard she had to be assisted out of the building by her grandmother. She scored 12 points and was as always tenacious on defense holding a girl who averages 19 points a game to a season low 7. One would have to go back around 5-years to find a league win of that magnitude. We are currently 9-7 with 7 tough games to go. We will have to win 3 of those games to be confident we can make the state playoffs. Still the team is not where I expected them to be at this point. I fully believed before the season that we would be solid down to the 6th or even 7th player but we are really being carried by 4-girls. I just can�t seem to get 2-3 of them to step up. That and we free-throw shoot slightly worse than a 5th grade YMCA team. That has cost us directly 2-wins. Ouch. We just have to keep after them I guess.

As for me I am doing pretty darn well. Oh, every few weeks I have a few days of sadness mixed with anxiety and reflection. I am in one of those funks right now. So much has happened in just a little over 3-years it sometimes is hard to put it all in perspective. Mom�s death in September of 2006 (the undiscovered adultery was really heating up then) followed by D-day on Thanksgiving, Plan A, exposure, the near but not quite fatal blow to the adultery, withdrawal, the inability to prevent contact, contact, fog bank, false recovery, Wayzilla�s flight to freedom and independence three years ago this Friday, Plan B, divorce, picking up the pieces for a shattered DD, the uncharted mine field that is self recovery and of course the death of my sister this past Memorial Day. She was an absolute rock for me during this time and I miss her so very much. I believe that the adultery has really not allowed me to fully process and grieve the loss of my mother and sister and that really sucks. Another gift from Wayzilla. I have had no professional counseling at all during this but I am starting to think it might be helpful. We�ll see.

But if I focus on looking forward and at all the good things in my life, DD22, DGS, my house, my gardens, my job, my team, my friends (all of the marital friends stuck by me) and that I want for nothing at all I can right myself pretty quick. Oh, and the smothered enchiladas and margaritas at the Rio Grande in Fort Collins.

Life after adultery does exist and can be as good and as fulfilling as you want to make it.

Thanks for checking in HTLD.

I just thought this needed to be reposted, just in case anyone missed it.

Hey Chris,

Yes, it has been 3 yrs of h3ll on my end too. I could have written the exact same thing. Just be glad that Wayzilla didn't drag you through court for two years. Having XWH charge me with everything under the sun was worse than the A itself. WH may have walked away with most of the money, but I am glad that I have my health instead (at least as far as I know).

Like you, I am now thankful for what I do have in my life, and I think I am healing nicely. Actually better than expected. If you have read my thread you'll know that I think XWH married Miss Mullet. I thought that I would fall apart if that ever happened, but instead it closed a door and has actually given me some relief and a new will to get on with my single life. It actually isn't that bad. I kind of like the freedom, the ability to do whatever I darn well please, and the knowledge that I know my life is now under MY control. There are down days here and there for me too, but they don't last too long now.

Here's to Aloo Gobi, Kasmiri Nan, and Masala Chai at the Tandoor...... Yum.

Glad to see your post, too, Chris. It's a comfort to hear words of wisdom from someone ahead of us on the trail. I like that you are keeping tabs on us. Yeah... me too, as for wanting to know how my story ends. Time will tell. Can't jump ahead to the last chapter which is probably a good thing.

My goal right now is keeping my head above water, enjoying life with the kids, and building back my mental health.

Good luck on the rest of the season.

I had this whole long posts written yesterday and hit "submit".......and MB went down!! Grrr!!! and, darnit!, I was FUNNY!!

So now, you get the Readers Digest Version.....

Oh, nevermind, most others have said some of what I was gonna say, anyway.

It's great to hear from you, coach.

If you would like those posts from and about your sister, contact the moderators. They may be able to recover them for you and get them to you. I, too, used to go back and read them......... what a wonderful woman.

Take care, my friend.

Fox

Hey Fred. I have followed your story a little. There are several similarities. You seem like you have arrived in a better place.



No Chai, I did not have to go through the ringer you and Holy have. Your adulterous idiot husbands are unbelievable. What�s all the hate about?

Wayzilla wanted out of the marriage faster than a cow wants out of a piranha infested river.



Gollum has yet to make a honest woman out of Wayzilla. At least to my knowledge. It�s been 3-1/2 years of stolemeating and nearly 6-months of co-habimating. Wonder what he�s waiting for? I think about it occasionally but I don�t think it will really bother me that much. And if he does I imagine he will prenup her up the wazoo. But I have to give her credit. She is still in the game stalking her money bags western wear sugar daddy with all her enticing piercings, tattoos and multi-ported semen receptacle skills.



Me too! You have been amazing Chai.



I pull for you guys and your kids every day even when I am not here. Your personal recoveries have been phenomenal from where you were when you first arrived here.



Always Ctrl C copy your whole post before you hit submit on the long ones goofy. I wanted the funny!



You too Cowgirl.

Things that make you go..."Hmmmmmmm..."

Nice update. Good to hear things can and do get better after divorce...

Great to see an update from you, Chris!

Glad all is well for you. Have to say I expected no less!

I am pleased for DD and for you both, to have re-connected with the Ex-Laws. I look at that as Winning back something adultery attempted to steal from you both. Chalk one up for the good guys!

Not to dwell on this, but I would encourage you on -

Although I am blessed enough to have my siblings with me & can only begin to imagine how horribly difficult it was for you to lose your sister, you have done an amazing job of working through an incredible amount of grief. Combined with all of the events prior, this has no doubt, added immeasureably to the load you carried.

JMHO, the timing may be just right for some counseling. You are very stable in your life as a whole. You have your feet firmly planted and the land beneath you is no longer shifting from the temor shocks of the past. It is from this more solid ground that you may be able to work through the any lurking issues of the past and grieve more completely for your sister. I hesitate to use the work 'completely', as I don't think grief is something that comes to completion, but I have been unable to find a better word. I'm sure you understand my meaning.

Keep up the great work. Push those girls and keep them at the line! They HAVE come a long way & will keep getting better under your amazing direction!