Keeping my fingers crossed and hands folded in prayer that you get the townhouse!!

Hope you & DS are having a wonderful holiday season!

:happynewyear:

I got a response from the realtor stating that she recommended me to the renter, so I may hear today. It would be nice to move for the new year. A literal FRESH START.

Thanks for the well wishes, Bugsy. I hope your new year brings with it joy and prosperity. We could all use a little, me thinks

I hope this works out in your favor, Miss Lucidity! You deserve things to start looking up.

Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and that the New Year blesses you!

Fox

i am determined to make the best of all of this. If the settlement occurs any time soon, I will be fine. I can pay off most of my debt and relax somewhat. I don't know WHAT I deserve, but I do hope my hard work will pay off.

Christmas was good. DS was excited about his new bike and Bacugon stuff, and this voice changer thingy my dad got him. He then spent the day with his dad. The family was good this year, nobody got tanked and acted like idiots. It was nice.

Oh I bet that was very cool SL....

Happy New Year, may it be G-ds will for you to reap the benefit and joy of following your heart of love and compassion. May it bring you joy, happiness and most of all surprises that tickle your soul and help you to feel alive and loved.

Because you ARE loved by so many.

You know Queenie, sometimes I feel like a bad person because I will sequester myself when my dad is being a doof or drunk. I don't know how to go halfway with him, and I don't think it's safe for me or DS, so when you said this...



I don't feel like I deserve this compliment. I have been really hard on my dad and continue to be. He certainly does not see my actions as loving or compassionate, and I can't say that he is wrong.

Well if he is a drunk and you don't want to be around that, in my book it seems that you are practing the highest form of love and compassion, for YOURSELF.

You are setting a HEALTHY boundary and that's something that G-d wants you to do.

You don't stop loving your dad or wishing that things could be different. But his drinking is a choice and you have the right to choose to be around the ickiness of alcohol or not, so I stand by my original statement.

LOVE AND COMPASSION - MS. GODDESS

LOL

Well when you put it THAT way. I certainly am trying to protect my DS and myself from the actions of others here. I am trying to provide a safe place for my DS. It's difficult, and even though my dad will say to me that he understands, he will then go to others and talk of how he detests my behavior, that I am an alien in his home.

I am praying that this house is mine so that I can get to higher ground. I will FEEL much more healthy then, and have more control over the environment that my son lives in. He really is why I make many of the choices I do. Thanks for the voice of REASON, Queenie. Sometimes I am just so close to it, I find myself getting sucked back in and feeling like a heel for standing my ground.

I DO

You are taking care of one of G-ds children and HAVE every RIGHT to protect yourself. It also sets examples for people on here how to learn to take care of themselves. Myself included.

Doesn't is SUCK we can't control others.

You are so welcome.

We are ALL in this TOGETHER.... As it SHOULD be...

Silent:

This quote:


Were you talking about your Father, or the Z?

Of course he is going to state to you that he "understands", but then go to everyone else and complain. That is what alcoholic's DO. You hide from his nasty behavior, and it YOUR FAULT! No, it not. Its HIS FAULT.

Yes, your living in his house, but you do NOT have to live with his abuse. He may be fine when he gets home and hasn't had anything to drink, but after he starts, your doing the right thing by excusing yourself and DS from his presence.

Your learning this stuff, S/L. It takes time. But your learning it....

Bramble would be proud. So would Mimi. This place is so much poorer for thier loss....

Hope you got into Cafe HON!

LG

This is SUCH and UNDERSTATMENT...

I miss them so much and hope they feel our love and spirit for them.

LG
I was talking about MY father. DS probably witnesses his own father drunk often enough. These are good lessons to learn when you grew up in this sickness, and hopefully i will be able to teach DS the same as he ages and becomes more aware of this. It's amazing how much poo we all learn to tolerate because we grew up thinking it's the 'norm'. It's in no way the 'norm' to be drunk at 11am.

I am much more healthy in many ways now than just four years ago.

I do miss BR and Mimi, a great deal, and hope they realize how much they payed it forward here.

Queenie is following in Mimi's footsteps; I see a lot of grace in her, and strength.

Well Queenie said it before I did, protecting yourself and your DS is more important than protecting your father's "feelings".

What up, Miss Lucidity? Any news on the new abode?

Catch us up with what's up with you.......

Fox

Moved in to my new place on the 1st of Jan. It was amazing how much better I felt. I still do. Now I have a stable environment for DS and me, and can work on discipline with DS. He's taken some MINOR steps backward since we came back from AZ, but nothing my undivided attention can't cure. With all of the chaos and weirdness at my dad's house, it was just so hard to keep everythng organized, and my kid is DISorganized, as I'm sure most kids are (except me, I was an ANGEL and perfect... )

Looking forward to another trip to AZ at the end of the month. Things with AZman are heating up to a boil. We are VERY serious now, and, surprisingly, I am unafraid. I have certainly been guarded over the last 6 months with him, but have found he has SHOWN me so many strong qualities and his tenacity and honesty. It's easy to fall deeply in love with him. He is very reassuring. So, I am in love again, fully and completely, with my eyes WIDE opened.

We disagree, and lo and behold, it's not FATAL. Who knew? DS misses AZman, the interactions they had and AZman's son. DS misses the weather, too (just as I do...UGH! I loathe winter!)

Anyway, all is well for now

I'm thrilled to hear all that news, SL! Nice to have a little peace in the heart, isn't it?

Good for you, my friend.

Fox

I am so happy for you SL. See, your move back wasn't the end of the world afterall, was it?

I hope you love your new place!!

So sorry we couldn't hook up last weekend, but I do get down there often so we will keep in touch. Hopefully next time I come it will be warmer. It was dang cold up on top of that mountain. The view was amazing though.

I really think I got car sick on Saturday from all of the winding roads. I am not a good passenger in the car due to my motion sickness problem. Doesn't bother me when I am driving though.

Look forward to talking to you again soon....

So it looks like the Z will be filling in for our IT guy at his departure. UGH!! He SUPPOSEDLY will be coming in toward the evenings, which should keep us from crossing paths, but he was in here today, which I found out from a couple of my coworkers.

I am NOT comfortable with this, but I know my comfort does not matter in this case. I suppose they thought "what harm can it do...she won't actually be present when he is here...". Well, I was present today. Whatev

I texted AZman to let him know that this was occurring and he was NOT comfortable, either.

Well that's a turd in the old break table donut box.

My dad's favorite is..."well that's like a turd in the punchbowl"

Spoke to the VP and found out that the Z is supposed to be used as backup, and has no idea why he was in here today with the in-house guy. Whatever.

I suppose it shouldn't make me uncomfortable, but it does. I just don't like SEEING him at all anymore. It's my Plan C. See as little as possible, communicate solely regarding DS and his care, no joking around and what not. I'm just not prepared to be buddy buddy. I can certainly be around him, when necessary, like for baseball practice and such. I prefer not to.