So will the alimony hearing be stayed as well?

Tell it to the judge!

tl

Hi guys,

I heard from the judge regarding custody and my contempt charge for her moving out of state without telling me. For custody, things are going to stay the same. For the contempt charges, she was found in contempt and owes me attorney fees in the neighborhood of about 5K.

Overall, the judge was VERY harsh about her false charges, not keeping me updated on stuff especially DD4's IEP, and moving without telling me where she is living.

But, in his view it did not warrant the kids seeing her less. So, things stay the same with our F'd up shared custody arrangement.

The judge also ordered the following:

1. She needs to seek counseling for anger and stress management in order to be a better parent (his exact words)
2. We need to attend co-parenting counseling sessions

Of course I'm dissappointed with the final result, but, I'm really happy with the very harsh language the judge used in descibing the ex's behavior. Hopefully she will do some introspection on the words and work on being a better person and not a psycho nutjob.

The co-parenting counseling sessions should be interesting - POSOM will be pissed as he does not want her to do anything that could cast him in a bad light without him being able to control the situation. Hopefully it will give me a chance to address a lot of the issues that I have that have broken down any chance of communicating.

Things like:
- exWW having POSOM listen in on phone marriage counseling sessions between the exWW and the counselor
- having POSOM testify against me in protection order hearings
- moving POSOM in the day after she files a protection order
- exWW unilaterally cancelling visitation on her whims
- her FALSE protection orders and trying to get me arrested in front of the kids.

etc, etc, etc.

I'm so sorry to hear this. Stupid judge--must be related to the guy who ruled in my civil suit! But at least he ruled in your favor on all the other stuff. Is half a victory better than none? I suppose so...but a whole victory would be BETTER!!!!

tl

Where to do you go next psubiker?

im sorry you are going through this.i just recently caught my WW and my cousin having an affair.any advice on what i should do?how did you get over it?

http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/u...in=158786&Number=2313039#Post2313039

Well, the divorce is going to take forever to complete. Because of her bankruptcy filing, there's a stay on alimony and property division. Since she filed pro se, she has no clue on what she needed to include in her bankruptcy filing. She hasn't even filed 2008 taxes yet. So, instead of the 90 days for Chapter 7, I can see it taking 6 months or more for the bankruptcy then another 3 months until the ancillary hearings.

As for the kids, the next big issue is where DD4 will go to kindergarten. She is currently in pre K at the local grade school. But, DS7 is in 1st grade at Charter School in the town. The hours at the Charter School are better for working parents, plus, you only need to be a resident of Delaware to go to the school. This would give exWW some flexibility and she won't have to maintain two residences. But, who knows what she wants to do.

I'm glad it (mostly) worked out for you, PSU. Regarding your disappointment in the custody arrangement, please don't forget that no matter how things look now, POSOM will NOT be around forever. Once all the drama of court and bankrupcy and everything else winds down, so will the affair. At some point, your exWW will begin to show signs of humanity again. The co-parenting sessions will help as well. Your kids will need their mother throughout their lives and at least they will still have a relationship with her by then. It sucks for now, but consider it an investment for them in the future.

I find it very interesting that your sitch is almost the same as the OWH in mine. With the exception that my WXH is not OW's cousin and he does have all his teeth, everything else is very parallel. OWH and OW go to court in about 3 weeks. She's already had a judge yell at her for moving without informing him and she's been required to take anger management after being charged with assault (she ran OWH over with her truck) and now she's stating that the charges were frivilous. It's nice to know that judges don't think highly of this behavior.

Hey folks,

PSUBIKER has been spending his time digging out from Snomaggeddon and the Snowpocalypse. THere's currently a snowpack of about 40 inches outside my apartment. In fact, I got off easy compared to other places in the area. To put it in perspective, there has never been two back to back blizzards hit Philly since Ben Franklin started keeping records in the 1700's.

The kids have been out of school since Friday, the 5th. They won't be going back until the 16th. When one parent is a stay at home parent, snow days are not an issue. When you are divorced, it plays extreme havoc. Oh well. The Ex and I managed these snowstorms better than the December Blizzard.

Since we got the custody order, things have been pretty quiet. However, Something is up with the ex - I got an email nasty gram from her today :

YOu must have more time and money then I do. Must be nice. I don't have the luxury of having a career due to the fact that I stayed home with the kids for over 7 years.

You shoud try it some time. Be a women in a hard to find a job in this job market and an ex husband that is doing everything possible to make you fail.

If you help me I can help you out . Stop daming me to hell and get over it.

As always, everything is my fault. I mean, it's all my fault she moved OM in the day she filed a protection order against me. I came real close to replying but I thought better of it and went outside to shovel off my car.

If you are feeling generous, you could send her some coupons from the Sunday paper, some top ramen, and exlax.

Perhaps another legal document landed on her doorstep?

I think you responded to her e-mail in the most suitable manner. Pretend you never got it, and never acknowledge it, even if she asks .

Hang on to that shovel, she may need to borrow it to dig herself out of the mess she's created.

P.S. That was my "G-rated" response. I had another but thought I might get censored.

As a woman who has a job AND 5 kids, two dogs, two cats, a turtle AND A JOB that isn't in the field of her choosing, but it helps pay the mortgage I find her whining an affrot to females EVERY-EFFING-WHERE.

They should revoke the license on her nethers cos she has no right to be called a woman.

Do we not have a wahbulance smiley?

PSU, I guess you really screwed up when you didn't simply drop dead on d-day. Man, we BS's really know how to ruin peoples lives!

I hope you did not reply to that.


PSU, look for STBXWW to start sending you more of these. There is trouble in affair land, the sky is not as clear as it once was and the unicorns are not farting rainbows anymore.


AND.......

OM/Second Cousin/Snaggle tooth, is about to walk, and STBXWW is starting to see it, even if only on a subconscious level.

When he does, and he will! WWSTBXWW is going to go Coo-Coo. She will either go nuts and blame you for him leaving, or expect you to take her back and take care of her, then go nuts when you don't.

Either way, there is more fun ahead for you my friend. I wish you and the kids the very best in weathering this long and severe upcoming storm.

The next few weeks will be interesting. We have CS hearing on the 22nd. It's her request for a change - no risk to me as I am already paying an extra 400 / month in daycare since she's not paying her share. I'm stuck paying it because if I didn't pay her share, I would have been up poop creek without a paddle too.

I'm going to push that she remain at her imputed income of 30K - it's still only 60% of what she was making when she decided to be a SAHM. Funny, she never complained about giving up her career to ride her horses every day until after she realized I didn't have to support her post divorce.

Plus, my attorney also suggested I request that she be imputed rental income from POSOM. I may not get it but it should paint her into a corner. If her lease is in her name only, I have a good chance of getting it. If it is in both of their names, then they are cohabitating and that bit of evidence will be used to help prove cohabitation to get her alimony petition dismissed.

Looks like you're doing well, PSU. You've come a long way.

You of course plan on bringing up her not paying daycare right?

I already have a contempt petition for that but it was continued because of her bankruptcy filing.

Nice! She loses whichever way it goes.