Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our discussion forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 19 of 22 1 2 17 18 19 20 21 22
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Originally Posted by jcb
WW just called, OM is all upset (he's losing his meal ticket)and she's "afraid" he's going to kill himself...I said it would save me the trouble....

Any chance you could drive over to wife's work.
Come into the building with flowers, and give them to your wife.

Say loudly - "For the woman I LOVE"

Give her a big hug & kiss -

OM would craphispants.



Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
Originally Posted by jcb
WW just called, OM is all upset (he's losing his meal ticket)and she's "afraid" he's going to kill himself...I said it would save me the trouble.

LOL!


Originally Posted by jcb
she did say "I understand you being upset, but that was vindictive...it's been over and I gave my notice..."

"The GF needed to be told, dear. Want a cookie?"

Don't engage your WW in discussions about your exposure. Lots of LB-ing await you down that path.


ManInMotion
===========
(see "MiM's Story" for more details)
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by jcb
she did say "I understand you being upset, but that was vindictive...it's been over and I gave my notice..."

Wow, and we thought it was sorta "vindictive" to have an affair and screw around with someone's boyfriend and then lie to her about it! silly us! sigh


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
J
jcb Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
J
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
Wife just called again, said OM is pi**ed, he's coming to see me...(he knows where my office is)

My wife BEGGED me not to talk to him because she was afraid of the "lies" he was going to tell about her to get back at me for exposing to GF....

Now, I'm not a veteran, but this sounds to me like my wife is afraid the OM is going to tell me something I don't know....

Should be interesting...I'm going to get a diet coke and wait for the show...

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Wow

Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
Originally Posted by jcb
Wife just called again, said OM is pi**ed, he's coming to see me...(he knows where my office is)

I suggest having security stop him at the door. Just in case.


Originally Posted by jcb
My wife BEGGED me not to talk to him because she was afraid of the "lies" he was going to tell about her to get back at me for exposing to GF....

Now, I'm not a veteran, but this sounds to me like my wife is afraid the OM is going to tell me something I don't know....

Yup!!!


ManInMotion
===========
(see "MiM's Story" for more details)
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
Originally Posted by jcb
WW just called, OM is all upset (he's losing his meal ticket)and she's "afraid" he's going to kill himself...I said it would save me the trouble....(probably should not have said that)...she did say "I understand you being upset, but that was vindictive...it's been over and I gave my notice..."

Awww, poor widdle OM!! Waah waah waah puke


D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!

Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549
Might as well hear what the OM has to say, as long as you know he's going to leave any weapons at home. Offer to meet him in a public place, just like the GF.
The warning you got was that some revenge affairs start between two betrayed spouses. Avoid heading in that direction.
OM will never kill himself. He's a loser who has no boundaries and thinks only about himself. Those people aren't suicidal. He has a better chance of getting lorena bobbited by his GF.


Me:BW, FWH 1DD 1DS
Status: Chronicled in Dr. Suess's "The Zax"
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by jcb
Wife just called again, said OM is pi**ed, he's coming to see me...(he knows where my office is)

My wife BEGGED me not to talk to him because she was afraid of the "lies" he was going to tell about her to get back at me for exposing to GF....

Now, I'm not a veteran, but this sounds to me like my wife is afraid the OM is going to tell me something I don't know....

yep, it shore do!! grin

Quote
Should be interesting...I'm going to get a diet coke and wait for the show...

Have fun!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,277
G
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,277
Do you have some kind of audio recorder you can use to tape what OM says?


Me 34
WW 30
Abandoned Feb 17th 08, D-Day Aprl 27th 08.
Returned home Jul 7th, OC born 12/30/08
The FOG is clear, and we are in recovery.
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Originally Posted by Gack1
Do you have some kind of audio recorder you can use to tape what OM says?

Have another male worker with you, if you do not have a recording device.

Last edited by Pepperband; 01/15/10 03:53 PM.
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
J
jcb Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
J
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
Everyone left....normally I would leave in a couple of minutes, but I think I'm going to stay a little while...

A revenge affair is something I wouldn't do, so I'm not worried about that with the GF...

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Good ideas!! You will want to play it all back for your wife.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Originally Posted by Gack1
Do you have some kind of audio recorder you can use to tape what OM says?

If you have an iPhone, you can use that to record.

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by jcb
Everyone left....normally I would leave in a couple of minutes, but I think I'm going to stay a little while...

A revenge affair is something I wouldn't do, so I'm not worried about that with the GF...

ahh, I bet that little weasel doesn't show!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,738
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,738
Originally Posted by jcb
A revenge affair is something I wouldn't do, so I'm not worried about that with the GF...


My wife told me "I would never have an affair..." even while she was having one.

Be very careful. Extraordinary Precautions are not just for the wayward.


Doormat_No_More
(Formerly Barnboy)
Original thread lost in the forum purge of '09.
4 months after D-Day
1 year after D-Day
Two Years Later
Four Years Later
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,155
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,155
WHY IS OM CONTACTING YOUR WS AND WHY IS SHE TALKING TO HIM?? there should be NC in place she should not be responding to his calls and if he starts talking to her at work she should walk away!!

She is obviousely talking to him because he has told her he is coming to see you and he is suicidal etc. Remind her she should be in NC or trying NC while this is going on, your an adult and can deal with OM if he want to get angry at you he should not have been talking to your wife, tell OMG that OM has gone running whining to your WS and she how much she likes that piece of information!

You did the right thing, not revenge wise but morally right to let the Girlfriend know what kind of person she is dating. She needs to make an informed decision about who she shares her life with and you gave her that gift.


BW 36(Me)
WS 38
Married: 2000
DD1November 22 2008 - DD2 October 2014
PA Duration September 08 - November 08
Second discovery- 6 online affairs 4 sexual one emotional. October 2014.kids: DS 17, DS 14, DS 12, DS 10 . Baby after divorce DS 18months

Divorced

Was misled into thinking we were in recovery for 6 years.

If you were shocked reading any of this, that this is the consequence of not following MB to the LETTER.

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
BH, they work together. Please read up!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
J
jcb Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
J
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 107
I'm going to go home...I've been waiting for this POS for 45 minutes now....

Spoke to wife again, she seems to be calming down a little..said we're going to have a "serious talk" when I get home...I agreed (haha)

GF wants to meet at a local restaurant/bar tonight at 10pm...haven't told WW about that yet, I think I may go..

Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549
Good luck. When you meet the GF, make sure it's not in a "cozy" table or anything like that. An IHOP or a Denny's is better than a bar, but do what you must.


Me:BW, FWH 1DD 1DS
Status: Chronicled in Dr. Suess's "The Zax"
Page 19 of 22 1 2 17 18 19 20 21 22

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 34 guests, and 54 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
caraduke, Convict20, GTNY, Avianna, BootsJeans
71,736 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,550
Posts2,322,800
Members71,737
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2020, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.  |  Web Development by SunStar Media.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5