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My wife left me last month and she contacted her first love that she grew up with. She fell back in love with him and moved in with him.
Could anyone please recommend any books or website information that would help me heal my broken heart???
I've been reading how to build a marriage, but right now I need to know how to heal my broken heart.
Thank you!
Last edited by JustUss; 02/03/10 02:24 PM.
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My wife left me last month and she contacted her first love that she grew up with. She fell back in love with him and moved in with him.
Could anyone please recommend any books or website information that would help me heal my broken heart???
I've been reading how to build a marriage, but right now I need to know how to heal my broken heart.
Thank you!
Last edited by JustUss; 02/03/10 02:25 PM. Reason: title
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Welcome User. So sorry you are here, but have found the right place. This is the FIRST AND FOREMOST site you should be on. Pick up Surviving the Affair by Dr. Harley.
Read, read, read as much as you can on this site. Post and ask for help. You will receive MUCH support.
Jer. 29:11
Me: BS age 35 POS-eX-the SORRIEST, CRUELEST, LOWLY WAYWARD SCUMBAG out there Married 14.5 years, together almost 16 DDay: 7-5-09 OC born: 7-23-09 no COM: tried 6 years  D filed 5/05/2011 D final 11/10/11 I was gaslighted for 2 years. "You were not built for a safe story. Take risks and feel what it is like to actually be brave. It's worth it." Carlos Whittaker
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Does the book "Surviving An Affair" have a lot of information about healing a broken heart? To me it seems mostly about reconciling with your spouse.
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Time heals a broken heart.
Do you want to save your marriage?
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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"Time heals a broken heart."
Queenie is correct. But you need to use that time wisely to fully recover. By "wisely" I mean--to understand what happened and to get a plan. A plan for marital and/or personal recovery.
Tell us alittle about yourself.
Length of marriage....kids?
How long was the affair going on?
How did you discover the affair?
Do you want to recover the marrige?
Dday- Feb 1998
Recovered!!
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Nerly is asking some really awesome questions. Can you answer them so we can support you..
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Did she leave you before meeting with B/f. What did she say was the reason for departure?
But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams -Yeats
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Hi User080909
After 1 year, I still have that same question. My heart was destroyed when my husband confessed to a one-night stand. The heartache was unbearable and indescribable but we want to heal our marriage and are working hard at it. The information on this site, the support from members here, the books recommended and many other related books available have helped me tremendously so I no longer suffer constant "heartache" though it does resurface now and again. I am not sure it will ever go away entirely but am hoping. I tend to think this "heartache" is like grieving the death of a loved one. It never goes away, we just learn to live with it.
There is a book you might want to check out by Dr. Paul McKenna & Hugh Wilbourn entitled "How Do You Mend a Broken Heart: Overcome emotional pain at the end of a relationship". I haven't read it yet but plan to even though my husband and I are not ending our relationship. Hope it helps you. Best of luck.
Sure1.
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That only comes with time, prayer, and forgiveness. 2 out of 3 of those are probably not possible right now if this is recent. Focus on the prayer.
Put the energy into making yourself a better person. Regardless of the future with her, you'l be better for it.
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Hi User080909
After 1 year, I still have that same question. My heart was destroyed when my husband confessed to a one-night stand. The heartache was unbearable and indescribable but we want to heal our marriage and are working hard at it. The information on this site, the support from members here, the books recommended and many other related books available have helped me tremendously so I no longer suffer constant "heartache" though it does resurface now and again. I am not sure it will ever go away entirely but am hoping. I tend to think this "heartache" is like grieving the death of a loved one. It never goes away, we just learn to live with it.
There is a book you might want to check out by Dr. Paul McKenna & Hugh Wilbourn entitled "How Do You Mend a Broken Heart: Overcome emotional pain at the end of a relationship". I haven't read it yet but plan to even though my husband and I are not ending our relationship. Hope it helps you. Best of luck.
Sure1. Great answer Sure1. I am a little over 6 mos. into the same boat as you, but am dealing with an OC from the ONS. SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS! I can definitely say that my heartache has been WORSE than the loss of my father and other close relatives. But, as you stated, I am learning to live with it. Did I mention how bad this sucks?  User, I'm not sure there is a "guidebook" for mending a broken heart. Like the posts above, I think the greatest healer will be time. Hopefully, your WW will want to reconcile and will see the err of her ways thus assisting in the mending of your heart. (If you want to reconcile with WW.)
Me: BS age 35 POS-eX-the SORRIEST, CRUELEST, LOWLY WAYWARD SCUMBAG out there Married 14.5 years, together almost 16 DDay: 7-5-09 OC born: 7-23-09 no COM: tried 6 years D filed 5/05/2011 D final 11/10/11 I was gaslighted for 2 years. "You were not built for a safe story. Take risks and feel what it is like to actually be brave. It's worth it." Carlos Whittaker
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While SAA is not a book on how to mend a broken heart, it is a manual for how to recover a marriage after infidelity. Since that is where you want to head, it will help.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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*moderator error during merge*
Last edited by Breezemb; 01/28/10 09:16 PM.
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User080909 I merged your topic to the SAA forum in order for you to receive the appropriate support. Sorry for any confusion Best of Luck. 
Last edited by Breezemb; 01/28/10 09:17 PM.
breezemb@gmail.com
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Thank you all for the replies. I don't want to discuss my relationship in the open. I tried to private message a few people but it says private messaging is disabled. Why is private messaging disabled????
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I understand your reluctance. It is very hard to talk about it. I haven't posted much either but the little bit I have has helped. I have read quite a bit and found several situations similar to mine and many have expressed the feelings I am experiencing which helped me realize what I am going through is normal. It all gives me hope that we can recover from this. Some days are quite good and I move forward then some days I fall back. Right now I am just on auto-pilot and I am fervently hoping to feel happiness again... you know that happiness that makes you appreciate everything and everyone around you and makes you feel that life is good? I used to feel like that all the time. Now I am just ambivalent. Guess this isn't one of my better days.
Keep reaching out. Keep trying. I wish you all the best.
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Thank you all for the replies. I don't want to discuss my relationship in the open. I tried to private message a few people but it says private messaging is disabled. Why is private messaging disabled???? Uh, it's a public forum. Not a private chat room. Everyone here is anonymous behind a pseudo-name. Why is that a barrier to letting us advise you? We can't help if we don't know the facts.
Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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PM's are disabled due to the possiblity of misuse. Posters on the forum are often in a fragile state of mind when they come and may not consider their actions carefully.
Recovered marriage, recovering self, life gets better everyday
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Thank you all for the replies. I don't want to discuss my relationship in the open. I tried to private message a few people but it says private messaging is disabled. Why is private messaging disabled???? Uh, it's a public forum. Not a private chat room. Everyone here is anonymous behind a pseudo-name. Why is that a barrier to letting us advise you? We can't help if we don't know the facts. Yea, what 'Fred' said...do you think I enjoyed coming here talking about my wife having sex with multiple men in the past, with complete strangers? Well these fine people have been where I am, they have walked in my shoes. They have given me great advise. You should do the same, IMO. Since you don't want to talk about your situation on a internet forum, I assume you have not talked to anyone in real life as well..?
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