Yep, it hurts, doesn't it. But the hurt will lessen over time. Those waywards say all kinds of weird, hurtful things.

This one's my favorite, too! Anything by Robert Frost is good. I bought the illustrated book "for my kids" from Scholastic Book Club(grade school book seller).

Sorry - back to your topic...

Thuis is what is now posted on the OW FB page; I'm going to scream!!!!!!

OW is sorry for those of you that received the sick email from WH's ex-wife. I deactivated my facebook account in December with hopes I'd avoid all of this before it got out of hand. Take a small dose of fact, add a huge dose of fiction, mixed with plenty of crazy & it pretty much explains it all! If you received the mass mailing please forward it to me, the more documentation I have the better. My apologies again

You know, that is pretty much what my WS OW wrote! There is definitely a script. I was called a psychotic ex. When people replied to me, I replied back saying "Thank you for your reply....btw I am not an ex. There are no divorce proceedings..."

The good thing for me was that OW didn't know who I had e-mailed so she had to contact everyone herself to let them know the situation. That was back in November. WS says that he is still dealing with the embarassing fall out. I say if you don't think you are doing anything wrong and you said everyone knows anyway, what's the problem? Why would you be embarrassed? No answer to that one.

You are doing great!

TM

Thanks Travel! I now know why I received so many negative responses. Did you happen to read the "sick" letter I wrote?

Yes, I did. I thought it was a very well written letter. It just shows how screwed up these waywards and their similar mindset friends are.

I actually finally got a good response. It was negative at first, but then the lady let me know that she had been through the same thing. She was very sweet. I am feeling that a forest fire starts with one tiny spark.:)

I need some help with a plan B letter.I'm feeling very weak right now and could use any support.

This is the conversation the OW grandmother and I had...

I�m writing to inform you that my husband is having an affair with OW.

During close to a year, H was in Iraq; we both professed our love for each other many times a day; every day, even the day before he returned he told me how excited he was to see me, and how much he loved and missed me.

A few days after returning home, he went to Illinois for a friends� wedding. It was very hard to see him go after waiting so long for him. I received a voicemail from H informing me we were getting divorced and I received the divorce papers less than a month later on our Anniversary. This has devastated our children and I beyond belief.

H has told many lies about me in order to justify his infidelity; however I have incontrovertible proof to the contrary, and am more than happy to share it.

I�m not a perfect wife, nor do I think anyone is, I have always tried to be the best wife, I�ve loved him, and always been faithful and kind. He has been my best friend, my true love, and all my heart for six years. I love both he and our family and am willing to put in the effort to remedy any issues.

This affair is the sole reason for the divorce, and is destroying our marriage and family. I hope that if you have any influence over WH or OW, you would stand against this affair and stand for the institution of marriage and for fidelity.

God bless, BS


no sure who you are but DO NOT contact me again! This is really unbelievably stupid and does show your intelligence or lack of! OW's G-ma

I'm very sorry you feel that way. I love my husband and contrary to what OW and WH are saying we are married still. I can prove it. I won't message you again. God bless you! BS


like I said before...before I contact FACE BOOK and tell them you are harassing people, I really think you should stop your bull s**t. you are making yourself look totally crazy !! You are always using "God"...not sure he would be very pleased with right now! Act like an adult girl friend!!! Handle your problems like a big girl! You are not getting peoples sympathy -- you are pi**ing people off and making them realize what a loon WH was married to. Now go get a life!!! OW's G-ma


OW's G-ma, I do believe that God is on the side of marriage and truth, not affairs and lies. Think of me what you want. I will pray for you! BS

You've got to feel sorry for these people.

One of OW's friends said that we obviously believed in different Gods. So I'm guessing that her god thinks that adultery is acceptable as long as it maks you happy.

Seriously, just be glad that you are well out of the mess he has created for himself.

I just started reading this thread EAM. My heart goes out to you.
Sounds like WH is way messed up and running away from a good women like you.

Make sure you remember you are one OK?

I don't have any advice different than what has been given so far.
Prayers with you and I am glad the children have you

Travel, I am glad to be out of this mess he created. I'm still very sad though.

My WH told me that God knows his heart and is okay with what he's doing.

From all this grief, I have at least become closer to God. I had always taken a narrow path and tried my best to be kind to others and follow the "Golden Rule". This experience has reaffirmed that for me. I have questioned my faith along the way, but now know that I AM a good person.

I have made mistakes in our marriage, yes. But, what a learning experience. I'm still very scared, but am keeping faith in the God that is for love and truth.

Sortingitout, Thank you for your kind words. I am very sorry about your loss.

WOW! I finally got a truly nice response; I think...

It's a bit ironic though.

BS, I am not sure that I know you but the name WH does ring a bell from high school and yes I know OW from high school as well. I am so sorry to hear that this has happened but I would recommend for your marriage that you take this off everyone's facebook page- retract it if you can. The only way you can save your marriage is if WH chooses to, you cannot force him into it or shame him either. I do hope that he will come to his senses and value the covenant of your marriage and the future of your children enough to try and see if your marriage can be salvaged. I understand that you are feeling very desperate but I am afraid this is not the answer. I am concerned that this may have the opposite effect you hope it will. You need to pray for strength and guidance. I recommend going to the site marriage builders and reading some of the books that are listed there. I will pray for you and your family. Sincerely, OW FB Friend

Note the reference to this site...

WRite back that you were recommended EXPOSURE by this site!

I already did. Thanks Karma!

Hi EAM-

Many WS's say something very similar to this:

Gosh, I hate it when people use God to justify their sin. What they are really trying to do is fit the God of the Universe into their own box, even if it means that their "god" will be violating His own commandments. My FXH said something similar to this when I found out about his PA after our D. I asked him (with some sarcasm) "You can't possibly believe that God brought you two together." He replied "Well, it certainly seems that way."

My ever subtle response was something like "There is no way God would say "don't commit adultery" in His commandments but then say, 'in your case-it's okay!" My FXH seemed shocked to hear that....oh well.

Many WS's say things like "God wants me to be happy" to justify their choices. It's just like when they re-write marital history and say things like "I haven't been happy for a long time" (even though they neglected to let their BS's know that little tidbit). They are trying to bend God's word to their foggy thinking.

The truth is, God never said He wanted us to be happy.
He said He wants us to have an abundant life and He knows that it takes some boundaries to make sure it happens for us. God is not a permissive parent who says to a petulant and spoiled child "go ahead and do that thing that will be destructive to you. I just want you to be happy in THIS moment."

One of the most important things that God impressed on my heart when my FWH left us was that my DH was God's prodigal, not mine. I knew I could leave him in God's capable hands.

Hang in there-

Very interesting response. (the FB exposure, I mean)

JohnsTwin...I agree completely. It will be interesting when the newness wears off for WH and he reflects on the hearts he has broken. I know him and I know he will. I wonder how Godly he will feel then.

I'm still in so much pain, but have been thinking a lot andit's really not just the affair..I mean really how can a H know his wife was raped and beaten and not care? I mean even as a human being? I think I'm better off without him because he just isn't the man I married at all any longer. my husband was kind and caring and loving and sweet most always. This person is cruel, heartless and evil. I know he's in a fog, but really how can I ever forgive both the affair and his lack of compassion for the rape?

I guess anything is possible, but I just don't feel very strong now. I know what you went through and it must have felt similar. How did you forgive?

Pepper, yes I thought it interesting and ironic as well. I was at least glad for a bit of positivity and not being called the "C" word.