Was hoping Larry would check out my latest post...give me some insight.

Any thing else I haven't thought of guys?

My WH is is rank and promotable.
If this goes down that promotion will be gone but who knows how long they can promote him again.

OH. MY. GOSH.

It must have made you shake with anger and sick to your stomach to read all that, but I am SO GLAD you persevered. You did amazing sleuth work!! I know it must have been terrible reading that in the middle of the night with the world asleep. Things are always better in the light of day.

If you can Plan A him on the phone then do that. If not, I'd tell him I'm super sick and throwing up and can he call some other time. Just don't let on that HE is why you're feeling so sick.

GREAT job on printing all that stuff out.

I would contact OW's husband, even though they are "separated". It's real hard to know exactly what that word means. Maybe he's looking for a D, maybe he wants to fight for his M. You cant' believe anything except what OW's H tells you himself.

I would also escalate somehow within the ranks. I don't know if you should go to the chaplain again or someone else... not sure how all that works. So make sure you talk to folks with military savvy on that front.

And I would do another NUCLEAR exposure. To WH's family, especially. Don't reveal your sources, or how you know, or exactly what you know. Just that you have learned that their affair has continued, unabated, and you ask for their support of your marriage. Ask if they have any advice (some of it will suck, but ask anyway).

What a long night it must have been for you.

I"m pretty sure that the OW H and OW are seperating. I mean if she is telling my H about his dating life...about getting in trouble for dating even though he's married.

Kept my BF on the phone until 4am my time while she read things that he wrote.

Seriously this contact started Feb 11 and by march 11 they are talking about marriage and a BABY! Ugh

I know when he and I were dating it was pretty much like the same except I married him in the end= there was no wife & kids in the picture. It was pretty much a whirlwind.

Debating if I should notify OW mom again. I don't even know if she say the "proof" that I did send her.

Either I let him know over the phone that I know there has been contact or let the chaplain over there tell him.

By that time I would have gone to legal, and then tomorrow the command. I would like to give him LAST chance to stop this however.

Don't tell your husband anything right now!!! Your job is to Plan A him. I know it will be hard but please keep mum about this to him. You never warn them that you're going to expose and you certainly don't give up your sources.

Your husband follows his infatuations around. And gets in trouble because of it, more evidence that infatuations die sooner or later.


What does that mean?

Nothing lost by telling mom again. By all means mention that you are pregnant. "You are fighting for your marriage in the face of what is always a temporary and dead end affair infatuation." She may be wise enough to understand that and go to work helping you AND of course, her daughter from making a big mistake.

Larry

Wow, Smiley.

You are a supersleuth.

What are you thinking of doing now that you have all of this?

Collect your information. Be armed. Never reveal your sources to him. Know your legal grounds. I don't think I would confront husband until you have one more session with Chaplain and get his advice, which he is trained to give, in terms of a military reaction.

Warning your husband is the same thing as playing the trump card. Except it gives him time to spin and prepare. He may already have done so, "She is crazy jealous, don't worry about it Sarge." Get your ducks in a row before you start shooting your bullets.

Larry

Going to follow my Plan that I described earlier

-Call chaplain right now
- call JAG see if they can see me right away
- close accounts that I can

plan a him until he hears from chaplain over there

go to command

FORGOT TO ADD

found out he started another bank account - not sure if it's checking or not but he did it the day I told him to change the password

I made it so that if he wanted to change the password to his bank account it is going to ask for a temporary password that is either sent to my email address or my cell phone.

Also made notifications to my cell phone of any deposits or any withddrawals over a dollar.

What does that mean?

Larry [/quote

I was talking about the OW H - OW was telling my WH that her H was getting in trouble with the Army for dating even though he is married.

I saw that after my first DDAY (when I discovered they have been talking) they still talked to each other

saw each other at school at pick up
went out to lunch (macaroni grill I've never been but he took her there)
went to the movies
he went with her to court

Reading it made me sick to my stomach.

How was he getting in trouble? Details please if you know.

THAT is important from husband's POV. He would believe her since he is infatuated. WOW! Great find.

That might also indicate that her husband is an officer. Officers get in more trouble than enlisted ranks for adultery.

Larry

[quote=_Larry
Collect your information. Be armed. Never reveal your sources to him. Know your legal grounds. I don't think I would confront husband until you have one more session with Chaplain and get his advice, which he is trained to give, in terms of a military reaction.

Warning your husband is the same thing as playing the trump card. Except it gives him time to spin and prepare. He may already have done so, "She is crazy jealous, don't worry about it Sarge." Get your ducks in a row before you start shooting your bullets.

Larry [/quote]

Great job. Stay calm and remember, you are working on NO SLEEP. That tends to make your thinking a little fuzzy. Slow down a sec and think everything through before you start making calls. You are doing great.

EXPOSE NOW! What are you waiting for?

I wouldn't talk to the Chaplain until after you have talked with JAG and/or command. You have already given him a second chance...are you going to give him a third, fourth, fifth...?

Yes this will hurt you financially, but your M is worth it. And make sure you tell everyone involved you still love your H and want to stay M. Explain the reason you are doing this is to break up the A, not to hurt him...

Who are you talking about? OW H? No he's definately not an officer.

Mine isn't an officer either

No, the details of how he was getting in trouble if you know.

Larry

Okay going to JAG first...calling now.

Ok can't schedule an appointment until tomorrow and my appointment will be for next week. I could walk in but the attornies will not be there all afternoon and was told many people will be turned away.

Sigh fine.

They do have an information brief about divorce and seperation at 2. I could go there and get that information except my kids get off at 3.