I'm so sorry, writer. I know it's around 5:30 there now, and I hope she is doing better. I am saying a prayer for all of you.

Court did not go well. My son can't go back to school and cannot even walk at his own graduation ceremony because the little b*@!ch wants to go and watch her friends graduate. We're also stuck with yet another month of home supervision even though my son turns 18 in 8 days and isn't even legally eligible for it anymore after that. Apparently, the judge doesn't know the law. DA is pushing for 2 years in prison and 4 years of probation, ending when my son is 24. His life will be ruined. I doubt he'll ever get a job and my H and I will have to support him until we die and then I have no idea what he'll do. Our PD doesn't listen to anything we say and seems to assume that my son is guilty.

We are hiring a private attorney. We are going to stop making our house payments to pay for it. We'll almost certainly lose the house, but there seems to be little other choice.

The baby has hand, foot, and mouth disease, which is highly contagious and will probably spread throughout our entire family. At least it's nothing serious, just 7-10 days of misery.

I am no longer speaking to my MIL, ever.

Am feeling very low. Murderous. Suicidal. What's the point even trying anymore? They always win. We always lose. They get everything. We get nothing. Guilty until proven innocent, but don't even bother trying, because once you walk into this building accused of something, you're already guilty and there's nothing you can do to change that. That, my friends, is what we refer to as justice in this wonderful country of ours.

(((( hugs ))))

What happened to "getting a polygraph" to prove your son did not force sex on her????

Either your son is guilty, and needs to be punished,,,OR, he is innocent and needs a polygraph and a good attorney. (Maybe if he is half guilty, he needs a good attorney to get out of it...)

Why blame the universe that he had sex with a 16 year old? It is his fault.

Which is it?

not nice Bubbles !!!!!

Bubbles: I'm not sure why I even bother with small-minded people like you, but if you would really like an answer, here it is:

My son wants to take a polygraph. He has asked to do it. The PD doesn't want him to, because she seems to be pretty much of the opinion that he's guilty. Hence the reason we are financially ruining our family and putting ourselves in jeopardy of losing our home by hiring a private attorney that we cannot afford. I wouldn't do that if I didn't believe 100% that my son is innocent.

Our family has been kicked enough for one day. Stay off my thread. I don't care to hear anything more that you have to say. You aren't remotely helpful to anyone on this forum, as far as I have been able to tell. You certainly aren't offering any helpful advice here, and your under-handed, immature jabs are not welcome.

My son wants to take a polygraph. He has asked to do it. The PD doesn't want him to, because she seems to be pretty much of the opinion that he's guilty

Can't you do it yourselves? Pay for one and do it?

Yes, we can. We would just like to do it while being represented by someone who believes in my son and supports us in the decision to do it.

I asked that so that others can help you. Thank you for your insults to me, I am sure that helped you let off some steam.

It did. I've been doing that a lot today, unfortunately. I apologize. I think I need to talk to someone, but not sure who. I'm having a very difficult time dealing with all of this. I'm trying to encourage my son not to give up hope, but it's difficult. He's really struggling with staying motivated.

I'm truly sorry and wish I'd never told you to try the public defender in the first place. Obviously, you got yourselves and idiot.

I also encourage you to click on Bubbles name and then click ignore.

It's not like you can or should walk into any old polygrapher and take a lie detector test. Looking one up in the yellowpages is RISKY. You need and want a referral from YOUR ATTORNEY so you get one that your attorney trusts.

Polygraphers are typically ex-cops. IF your son, by chance...FAILS the private test an untrustworthy polygrapher MAY leak the results to the DA's office. Not that they will or can ever use the private results...but you can be certain they won't be then offering any deals or breaks after getting tipped off that they appear to have a guilty one on their hands.

Get an attorney and THEN the polygraph.

Mr. W

Thanks Mr. Wondering. We've got a call into the attorney now. Hopefully we'll here from him tomorrow. I don't know a thing about choosing a good polygrapher, so I definitely need the guidance of an attorney.

The thing that bothers me the most about the PD is that she lied to us. She said our son definitely wouldn't be taken back into custody when we went to court today (turns out, that was actually a real possibility that thankfully didn't happen) and she told us that he wouldn't be eligible for home supervision any longer and that restriction would be lifted (it wasn't). When I asked her about those things after the hearing, she denied ever saying them. My H, son, and I all heard her. I don't think all three of us could have heard her wrong.

Right now, I'm hunkering down to spend a very long night with a very sick baby. I keep wondering if we got a complete diagnosis. From what I've read, foot, hand, and mouth doesn't seem that terrible, but our baby is miserable. She won't sit up or stand at all. She hasn't eaten since Saturday. She'll take little sips of juice now and then, and she'll nurse occasionally. Mostly, she either sleeps, or whines and moans constantly. I feel so bad for her and I just don't know what to do to make it better. And I am so angry at my MIL for refusing to come over and watch her this morning so we wouldn't have to take a sick baby to court. I ask almost nothing of this woman. And I don't think it has anything to do with the whole OC, that's not my REAL grandchild kind of thing. She was like this with all our other kids too (including biological grandchildren) and just about everything else we've ever asked her help with (of which there have been precious few, precisely because the answer is always no). Vent over.

Good night.

Please bring the child to the hospital. The diagnosis could be wrong. The baby could die. And thanks Mr Wonderin. You are a peach.

writer, my heart is hurting for you. I know that feeling - that's what the*&%#$&*^%(&*^% is the point feeling. I wish there was something I could do besides pray. But you said you have no one to talk to. If you want my email address, just let me know or let the mods know. I'm not an attorney or a therapist, but I can listen and sympathize and curse all those darn idiots with you. I'm good at cursing darn idiots.

I think you have gotten good advice from Mr. Wondering. Polygraphs have always scared me because I am so hyper/bipolar/weird. But they are pretty advanced now and are supposed to be accurate. That will give everybody concrete peace of mind, and you can hold it up to the world and say, "See! I TOLD YOU!"

Thanks Luri.

I can't even think right now. I don't eat well, I don't sleep well. I feel nervous and tremendously upset all of the time.

My son is a good, sweet-natured, funny, helpful kid. Out of all my kids, he has caused me the least amount of problems. He's never had any discipline issues at all. I keep obsessing over what 2 years in prison with hardened criminals will do to him. I feel like I'm going to lose my son.

Try to think positively. He's not there now. Maybe he won't be. If this isn't a picture of what angry, bitter, vengeance (which is what is motivating this girl) does to a person I don't know what is. I feel really sorry for people who are so angry or so lacking in people skills that they have to make others miserable.

(((Writer)))

Hon, do you still have my email addy? I am available also if you need a shoulder. I live in LA so it might be possible to meet up in person at some point.

Writer,

I just read part of your thread. I'm sorry about your son.

As far as polygraphists go, your state should have a professional association of some type.

I'm in FL, here is the Fl polygraph Association website that you can see as an example. (I don't know how to link.)

http://www.floridapolygraph.org/

If you look at the FL site under "Find a Polygraphist" you'll see a slot to click to Post-Conviction Sexual offender Testers. In my state, these professionals have gone through the Dept of Law enforcement certifications to to do examinations on people who have been accused and convicted of sex crimes (and are on probation or the FDLE offender's list). The test findings are used by the court and law enforcement.

Maybe your state has a similar association that will allow you to contact an examiner who is certified to test in situations like your son is in. If your state's dept of law enforcement has such certification for it's specialized examiners, you might want to consider having your son tested that way.

If you can't find that type of examiner, select someone with former law enforcement/polygraph experience. Former LEO's are more credible as witnesses to the court.

As far as an atty is concerned, you're going to want to a board certified bulldog in criminal law for your son. Please do all in your power to get the $$$ to retain that type of atty. PD's are known for plea bargaining...that's not what your son needs.

Not to be nosy...but it looks like your in CA....

here's the CA site link

http://www.californiapolygraph.com/members/roster.htm#The%20following%20CAPE