yeah: Everything meleodylane said.

Do it. Do it now. Expose. Expose on FB.

And never, ever move out. WW had the affair not you.

Second thought, moving out will be ok. As long as you don't mind the unemployed OM moving in banging your WW in your bed with your kids being there and your money keeping your roof over the OM's head and his butt over WW.

OK...I've never seen WW this mad...she actually said by me talking to her father I betrayed her...Yes, WW said that!

Her EA was "only one thing I did but you(me) did many"

I'm selfish for exposing...of course I reminded her that she was selfish for her affair with the OM.

Screamed at me to get after warning me not to say "that word (affair)" again which naturally I couldn't refuse saying affair in the next sentence

jlowes, did you expose the affair to everyone ELSE? What about the OM's WIFE? What about his facebook friends? It is best to get this done in one fell swoop so you have ONE BLOWUP rather than several. Get the rest of your exposures done ASAP! And go pay a visit to the OM.

Good job on calling it an affair!! Keep it up. Call it either "adultery" or and "affair."

You did good! Now finish the job!

ML - I exposed 7 weeks ago but her father whom she has a very bad relationship with was the last person on my exposure list (she hasn't talked to him in months and in fact WW said I turned into him!). So my Plan A has been going on for about 7 weeks with several blow ups in between. Now in MC the other day, it was revealed that WW's anxiety/depression medication hasn't been working very well so that was a huge red flag for me. So I don't know where her mind really is. WW also said that she has set her feelings for OM "aside for the sake of our children"...of course I don't have IDIOT written on my forehead so I know full well what that statement means.

WW said that me telling her Dad was the most hurtful thing that I've ever done.

WW bought "The Good Divorce" yesterday and started reading it...I know that probably means very little but I told her this morning I don't want divorce...should have reworded it as "I don't do divorce"...will do that next time the topic comes up.

My biggest worry is that right now WW is very fragile mentally and the last thing I want to do is send her over the edge. I also don't want to be the one to abandon her in this mental state either.

She continually states "I just want to live in peace" together for our family which I am doing...but when I bring up contact with OM and the affair WW states "I'm being negative" and it's no longer a peaceful environment and my "emotions" change day to day and she never knows how I'm going to be when I walk through the door.

My gut feel is that WW is using me to meet Financial Support, Domestic Support, Family Commitment EN's while letting OM meet some of the other EN's.

The reason that I didn't originally expose to WW's father is because WW's relationship with him is so bad that I didn't think it would matter that I told him about the affair.

I big part of me still believes that WW is deflecting her anger with herself, shame, and guilt at me when she tells me how angry she is at me.

jlowes, your wife is depressed because of her affair. This is the result of having a battle with your conscience. You cannot allow her depression to prevent you from fighting this affair.

You MUST call the OM's wife and make sure she understands that the affair is STILL ON. You can't crawl under the rug because she is depressed or you are not going to make it. Of course she is depressed! That is a signal to work harder to kill the affair, not to lay down and die.

You should be causing as much conflict as possible in this affair if you want to save your marriage. The longer the affair goes on, the more entrenched it becomes.

There is family history of depression on her side and she has been on medication for several years.

Yes...when I told her NC with OM the other day, she was very sad...cried for a long time in our room.

I think this time she is ready to walk but that is entirely up to her...of course she'll reverse it and put it back on me

While pressuring OM to end contact with WW should I tell WW the following: Is your continued "friendship" with OM worth the pain that currently is being inflicted on our children now and for the rest of their lives if you decide to divorce?

I wouldn't even play the word game with her. Call it what it is - "adultery".