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Thanx Still. Scotty is okay for me on these forums too. Hmmmmmm, maybe I should find a highlander pic and put it on here? Hmmmmmm
It's too HOT in here to THINK. +30C as a high today was too much. Glad tomorrow will be 22C but it will be raining. ![[Linked Image from bestsmileys.com]](http://bestsmileys.com/expressions/12.gif) Whats that in real temperature???? ![[Linked Image from bestsmileys.com]](http://bestsmileys.com/expressions/9.gif) Well, seeing as the poster on this thread is CANADIAN, THAT WAS REAL TEMPS.  I actually had someone(an American) say to me, after I handed them back Canadian change, "I want REAL money." I wanted to SMACK her. It is REAL money. WE ARE IN CANADA. Okay, so it was 90 degrees with a humidex of 100. HOT HOT HOT
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Optimistically guarded...very good place to be in! I LIKE that your WH is a logical kind of guy. MB seems to make most sense to people like him. Do please keep yourself protected from any further false recoveries but also relax and enjoy the last days of this pregnancy.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Hi everyone, not much new to report, just going along the same as usual with WH and Steve. I had a question - I don't know if this is normal or what it means...and I'm sorry if it's a bit...personal.  I find WH is disinterested in me. Physically. If he's feeling turned on he'll come to me but 90% of the time he just seems disinterested and like he doesn't want to be intimate with me. Is this normal? Even in the midst of his A he never seemed like this. I know I shouldn't let it get to me...but my feelings are getting really hurt. He just doesn't respond to me anymore. Is this normal for a wayward? Supposedly he's not in contact with OW anymore so I can't figure out why he doesn't want me....
Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10
Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10
Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012
Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
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I don't really know. I will say that if he is in NC with OW, he is going to go through a withdrawal and will be depressed. That may attribute to this. I know some vets will chime in as well.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Hi everyone, not much new to report, just going along the same as usual with WH and Steve. I had a question - I don't know if this is normal or what it means...and I'm sorry if it's a bit...personal. I find WH is disinterested in me. Physically. If he's feeling turned on he'll come to me but 90% of the time he just seems disinterested and like he doesn't want to be intimate with me. Is this normal? Even in the midst of his A he never seemed like this. I know I shouldn't let it get to me...but my feelings are getting really hurt. He just doesn't respond to me anymore. Is this normal for a wayward? Supposedly he's not in contact with OW anymore so I can't figure out why he doesn't want me.... He's in turmoil right now. Getting back to reality, shaking off his addiction - it's a lot for a wayward. Plus - don't forget you are 'big with child.' That's a lot for a guy's libido sometimes. Don't worry, sweetie. Keep doing what you're doing.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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[quote=maritalbliss
He's in turmoil right now. Getting back to reality, shaking off his addiction - it's a lot for a wayward. Plus - don't forget you are 'big with child.' That's a lot for a guy's libido sometimes.
Don't worry, sweetie. Keep doing what you're doing. [/quote]
Is is just the addiction and turmoil? I mean, YES, I am super pregnant right now. But, that never bothered him before, he always said I was really sexy pregnant, even with my first pregnancy, and now all of a sudden he wants nothing to do with me.
I know he's probably going through withdrawal....but is that the reason? Sapphire, are you around? Did you go through this when you ended your A?
Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10
Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10
Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012
Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
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AHEM. Little miss NP. I saw waht you posted on teaser's thread. NC means NC for BOTH of you my dear. No logging onto your sister's account to yell at her pic. This will keep the anger in you. She means NOTHING, REMEMBER?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Right Right Right. :P lol. I know it's supposed to be as if she's dead to us. You could still yell at a dead person's pic though.... BUT ok, no more logging on to yell at her picture.
Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10
Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10
Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012
Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
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Posts: 8,240
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In your angry moments you can just yell at her through the universe. I am sure you will always remember what she looks like, unfortunately. You need to focus on you my dear.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Since you are somewhere between Plan A and finding a maintenance level, be sure that you express your interest in him with no expectations of a response.
Dress sexily, be flirty, and admire him all over the place. Tell him what he does that drives you wild. If he doesn't respond, no problemo - keep it up anyway.
While he's still so foggy and may even be in deep undercover C, it's not possible to tell whether his lack of interest means anything. You won't be able to tell right at first which it is, so just treat it as a Plan A opportunity.
Three months from now if he's still like this, look for C because you will find it. Right now it's anyone's guess.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Hi everyone, not much new to report, just going along the same as usual with WH and Steve. I had a question - I don't know if this is normal or what it means...and I'm sorry if it's a bit...personal. I find WH is disinterested in me. Physically. If he's feeling turned on he'll come to me but 90% of the time he just seems disinterested and like he doesn't want to be intimate with me. Is this normal? Even in the midst of his A he never seemed like this. I know I shouldn't let it get to me...but my feelings are getting really hurt. He just doesn't respond to me anymore. Is this normal for a wayward? Supposedly he's not in contact with OW anymore so I can't figure out why he doesn't want me.... Yes, I found it to be very normal. My FWH lost his desire for me for a pretty long time. Add to that the A ended (if it is really, really over) while things were still "good" with them so withdrawl will be a real bear. Don't take it personally, NP. (yeah I know...I just said that to a hormonal preggy LOL) 
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Oh and please tell me you are using protection!
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Oh and please tell me you are using protection! There's been nothing to use protection FOR! :P I asked him tonight why he was so disinterested in me. He said he still finds me very attractive, but he doesn't love me, and that is why he has zero interest. I was doing everything - complimenting him, being affectionate with him, everything, and no response. My feelings are very very hurt. I guess I just keep up with what I've been doing? I guess it's just getting to me because he's never acted like this to me before, not even while he was having his affair. Faith - glad to know it's not just me. It gets better, right?? well - only three more weeks until I can fit back into something remotely sexy... 
Last edited by NewPetals; 05/31/10 11:13 PM.
Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10
Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10
Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012
Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738 |
It just struck me as I was folding laundry - wth is going on in WH's head?? One second he's saying he's done with the marriage, the next he shows up at home and says he wants to fix our marriage, even counsels with Steve. One second he's giving me secret kisses in the night and saying he loves me, and the next he's saying he has zero interest in me because he doesn't love me... Wth?? Are all waywards this confusing??? 
Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10
Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10
Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012
Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
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Posts: 3,686
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It's called cake-eating and fence-sitting. He wants to keep you hanging around.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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Hun, it's CRAZY-MAKING to try to figure out what Waywards are thinking.
Just work your Plan. Plan A right now, with one foot heading towards recovery, while looking for continued contact. Take care of yourself until this baby is born.
Last edited by Scotland; 06/01/10 07:01 AM. Reason: adding something
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Yes he is still foggy and going thru withdrawal.....
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
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There's been nothing to use protection FOR! :P Please tell me you are not serious on this NP?!?!? Please tell me you are not having unprotected SF with WH?!? Has he been tested for STD's? What if OW is carrying something around? You have an unborn baby to worry about!!
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There's been nothing to use protection FOR! :P Please tell me you are not serious on this NP?!?!? Please tell me you are not having unprotected SF with WH?!? Has he been tested for STD's? What if OW is carrying something around? You have an unborn baby to worry about!! I took it as he has not been interested in having SF with her at all right now...
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
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NP, it DOES get better but it takes time. Again, he (hopefully) ended the A while still "in love" with OW. That makes this process much harder and can cause resentment. Keep up your plan A and have protection handy in case he decides he wants SF.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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