Brooke wanted to live in secrecy. She wanted to justify that because she wanted what she wanted for her OWN selfish needs.

When Brooke found out she was pregnant, she had to reveal the pregnancy, and the affair. She did struggle with this - it was not easy. In the end, she revealed the truth.


It doesn't surprise me that she ended up with the OM, though. She was foggy on arrival, and foggy on departure. She came here with a sense of entitlement, and likely remains in that mindset. She didn't stay long enough to learn or to understand WHY she needed to do what she was being advised. There was not enough time to get her into No Contact, not enough time before the pregnancy, for us to guide her to where she would actually hear what we had to say.


Hers is a story of loss - and that is the sad fact of affairs.


tiaga,
I'm sorry you have been hurt by Brooke's affair, and that her exBH remains in pain.

The good news for the exBH is that he COULD come here, and he COULD still be helped by MB. Yes, that is true. We could help him by answering questions, understanding what he has been through, looking back at the anatomy of his own affairs, his own marriage, and help him look forward to relationships and how to avoid what he has been through with Brooke and his own betrayal of her as well.

Send him here. As far as that goes, YOU can learn about this behavior - what it is, and what it isn't, what it means, and what YOU can do to move through the grieving, the anger, the pain, and into a recovery phase for your own life.

There IS life after an affair.

This is the place to figure this out - whether or not the marriage survives, or even if you are in the marriage.

Welcome to this club - and we know you didn't want to be a member. Nobody here did.

Schoolbus.

"I am not Brooke's XH OW. That is another person Brooke got revenge on. I don't think she would go near Brooke. Her ex husband stays far away from the OW. Brooke's ex's affair was very wrong and he has paid dearly for it."

tiaga can you expand?

I remember brook not wanting to tell her WH/BH about the affair.

XH's mother, I suspect.

Whoever you are, tiaga, I think it would be great for Brooke's ex to come here for support. I'm sure his ex-wife's actions are still really paining him, as they are paining people who care for him.

My reading was that this was the XH's sister, but that's just me.

doesn't really matter who tiaga is - just that she can learn from MB, and so can Brooke's XH...

More than anyone, he can. He had an affair, and we can help him learn about himself from that. He was burned by Brooke, and we can help him recover from that.

Someday, Brooke's XH will be looking at a woman and wondering about loving her, spending his life with her, and considering a committment with her.

He is not able to do those things

He does not have the tools

MB can help him understand those things, and give him those tools.

For the XH, the best thing he could do in this situation would be to live happily ever after, in an affair-free marriage, with the woman of his dreams. Marriage Builders can help him do that.

Send him here, tiaga, he might be really surprised at the personal growth he would find here. He has to be very strong, though, because he would be put through the paces of more insight into himself than he might want to go through at times.

Recovering from an affair - whether you are with the betrayer or not - is hard. It is harder still when you make the decision to set yourself on a path that forces you to understand why you made bad choices, why you behaved badly, why someone betrayed you, and to make HUGE changes in yourself in order to set your life on a different road.

He has that chance, every day.


His choice. He can continue to "be miserable", or he can do something about it.


You, tiaga, can continue to be bitter, or you can learn about affairs and figure out how to get through this grief and anger, and set yourself free of it.

Your choice.


SB

Technically at this point, if the situation is as Tiaga has described, recovery and remarriage might even be possible using Marriage Builders principles. I'm not sure if anyone involved would want that.

Re: Brooke revenge on OW. Brooke told her ex husband the only way she would withdraw her petition for divorce is if he destroyed the OW's life. Brooke's ex husband was instrumenetal in getting the OW fired from her job. He did all of Brooke's bidding to cause the OW the most pain possible. I really don't care Brooke did this to the OW. Everyone supported Brooke when she filed for a divorce myself included. The OW would have never been welcome in our family. Brooke knows the pain of infidelity. Why would she turn around and do the same thing? She could have gone through with the divorce.

Schoolbus you say Brooke's story is a story of loss. What has she lost? The sad thing is she has not lost anything. She does not consider not be married to her husband anymore a loss. She could not wait to be legally free of him.

As far as reconcilation with her ex husband using marriage builer techniques that would require Brooke to make some drasic changes in her life that she is not prepared to make. She could never have contact with her OM. That is impossible because one they share a child and two brooke does not want to stay away from OM.

She would have to give up her relationship with her brother. You see to this day he is still best friends with the OM. He also supported Brooke's affair with the OM and tried to keep it concealed. Brooke said she would rather die than give of her relationship with her brother. I think she would even choose her brother over her OM.

I also don't think her ex husband can deal with the fact that she has been in a relationship with OM for nearly 2 years and there does not appear to be an end in site.

I don't forsee any type of reconcilation being possible.

I just don't understand why you are here talking about someone else. Why are you doing this?

Why doesn't her ex-husband rejoice to be free from that witch if that is the case? I didn't hear about any children he had w/ her. He should plan B her (not to save the marriage but to help himself heal). Two years after divorce, he should be happy that he got out before he had any kids.

So what? Brooke is a horrible person. We get that. There are a lot of horrible people in this world. Just chalk up another one to the list.

I thought the same thing AND I thought it was against TOS to be talking about posters that are no longer here. This is GOSSIP plain and simple. Brooke is not here to defend herself and her xH is not here either.

tiaga, are you on here to hurt Brooke by proxy? This is wrong and cowardly. If you have something to say to her, then say it TO her.

I don't know why Tiaga is here. And I don't really care.

Brooke was wayward. She still is. Maybe Tiaga will continue to post of Brooke's evil deeds for the next 20 years.

It would be interesting to see the Karma Bus return often to roll over Brooke.

If Tiaga wants to read here and learn something about MB Principles, and carry that into thier personal life, I don't have any problem with that.

Many posters here talk to other posters off-line, and some never come back, but keep in touch with people who stay. And sometimes they pass along the good news about Sad 2007 or Hurt 2008 that just lets us long timers know what is happening, and that there is recovery, whether marital or personal available here.

Brooke is still destroying lives. She isn't the only one in the world doing that. We just happen to know about it.

JMVHO.


LG

LG, you are not seeing if the Karma Bus returns often to run over Brooke. You have no idea what is happening to Brooke. You don't know that she is is till destroying lives. You do not "happen to know" anything about her.

You are hearing a motivated, one-sided account from someone who claims to know her. You do not know that any of this is true. Why is it interesting to hear this?

AGAIN we don't know this posters motives and frankly it is WRONG to post a so called "update" about a poster without their express permission. I have already notified the mods about this thread and hope they shut it down.

This is not gossip. Brooke and her OM are out in the open. They don't hide their relationship. It kills me that our community has forgotten how Brooke and her OM started out. Brooke is well liked. So what it does not change the past.

Jmwc95 why should he be thrilled to be rid of her? There is nothing thrilling about this. It's like you want to put a timeline on his healing. What is the appropiate time for a person who lost his wife and best friend at the same time? These were 2 people he loved more than anyone. On top of that there is a child. He lives his life. Don't worry about that.

The OM stole Brooke and a child that should have been his. I really want to know how long it should take for someone to get over that.

It is gossip in THIS community. They are not here. Her xH is not here. YOU are gossiping.

This affair and divorce seems to have severely hurt tiaga. Why is he/she not allowed to talk about it and the pain and destruction it caused? Affairs and divorce hurt more than just the BS, and it's not just the BS who needs to heal.

How is this any more gossip than exposure?

Who put faithfulfollower incharge of who gets to vent here?

Brooke and her H never got the tools to recover their marriage. Maybe it could of been maybe not.

As said here revenge affairs never help a marriage.

Sad more so that Brooke found her OM to be marriage material and great dad material. A man that could betray his best friend behind his back. Makes one wonder what poor traits will be passed on to this OC.