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that is a great idea, tonight when I get off of work I'm going to sit her down and get all the terms out, how do I discuss these terms with her without being an @sshole? I cant just sit down and say i need you to do this this this this this and this or your gone. I want to avoid any AO's tonight. also a poly test? those actually are available for public use? Would it really be worth it?

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Why wait till you go home? Write her an email and say, this is what we are going to do to prevent any future affairs, so we can have an open/honesty/happy relationship, if you wont do the following, then I suggest you leave, and have some time to think about it.

Why wait? Let her know NOW!

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SENT! I'll update when she responds

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SWEET!!

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My husband suggests she follow the MB program.

Like I said, if she doesn't then don't hesitate to kick her out..

I DO NOT believe her, when she says she wants to stay and fix the marriage, that's why I mention to put the bar VERY HIGH! And to see what she does, actions speaks louder then words.

have you installed a key logger on your computer to make sure she is in NC with any of the boys or NEW men?

If not...I would suggest you do that.

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I have not yet, but I will if she agrees to terms. most of the contact was through text messages, right now her cell phone has text messages blocked and I blocked josh's number.

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GOOD!

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I agree actions speak louder than words which is why im still very skeptical myself. But I will order 2 HNHN books so we can read them together and schedule an appointment with SH

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Originally Posted by never_again
I have not yet, but I will if she agrees to terms. most of the contact was through text messages, right now her cell phone has text messages blocked and I blocked josh's number.

Where does this Josh live? Could she have contact with him in person?


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story
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You don't have to buy 2 of them, just get 1 and read out loud together...that is what my husband and I did.

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Yes, Josh was actually a friend of mine, and he lives about 15 mins away. I have confronted him myself, he denied sleeping with her but did admit they had something going on, he appologized and said that she was telling him me and her were over and getting a divorce, I told him that if he talks to her again I will go straight to the commander and expose the affair. (adultery in active duty military will end his career)

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He's married??


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no he is not married, but he could still be punished for sleeping with another active duty members wife

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Do not be too shocked if WW is not there when you get home, and is back to her old ways.

Just in case she is serious, what is your plan for snooping on her?

Originally Posted by never_again
no he is not married, but he could still be punished for sleeping with another active duty members wife
Do you have any evidence of this?



Me 34
WW 30
Abandoned Feb 17th 08, D-Day Aprl 27th 08.
Returned home Jul 7th, OC born 12/30/08
The FOG is clear, and we are in recovery.
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I dont have any evidence, but as long as he thinks I do hopefully he'll be scared to contact her

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I'm not worried about your friend...what I am worried about is your wife sleeping around with other men! I am worried what your wife is saying...DO NOT BELIEVE HER!! Like I said watch her actions, have she emailed you yet? If not, then call home A.S.A.P and tell her to check her email.

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as for snooping, I figured a key logger, keeping track of her cell phone calls and texts and if i find that texts are being deleted im going to get a program that saves all texts to the computer, records phone calls and ive heard they can even act as a voice recorder even when shes not on the phone

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She hasnt emailed me yet, im gonna try to get off work alittle early today

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Call her! Tell her about your email.

Don't tell her you are getting off work early.

Surprise her when you come home, you might find something that she is doing that you are not approve of.

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Go ahead and get Flexi-Spy

And get a LSA Tracking Key

And a few Voice Activated Recorders to place around the house and in her car.


Me 34
WW 30
Abandoned Feb 17th 08, D-Day Aprl 27th 08.
Returned home Jul 7th, OC born 12/30/08
The FOG is clear, and we are in recovery.
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