princessmeggy,
I think I am fooling myself. They are one of a kind and to not care. Do you really think OW will be bothered by the fact that WH has a motorcycle..
I guess she will start to wonder where he is going...she used to be the only transporation he had but now the motorcycle appeared so that means he is going to be more independent.
He has not shame and no sense of guilt, he is really gone very low,
blessing

Go back and read the article you posted this afternoon. Part of the allure may be his neediness... NOW. Later, that might get a little old, especially when they think you're completely out of the picture.

P.S. To me that's kind of bassackwards but I guess some women need to rescue and fix.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Atena}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

How is the job hunt going?

Thank you Princessmeggy, I just think the allure for her was that her H left her for OW and now she is doing the same to me. You are right, I am part of the thrill of it all.

Melody, I am finishing my master and have not much time to job hunt, but once I am done I will start.
I think I would be much better off starting anew with a new person. My WH is kind of gone to the deep end and I doubt he will de-fog any time soon
I am 45 and I do not know who I could find at my age...all men that are around my age are either divorced and full of problems or just full of problems period.

I do not want to spend the rest of my life alone.
blessing

I agree you might be better off getting divorced and finding someone new. But in the short term, you have to get away from him, Atena! It is too hard on your nerves! Every time you see him, it drags you right back to day 1 of Plan B.

I will work on getting away from WH. I was just hoping he would leave but now I see he is too taken by OW: If they broke up he for sure would go...
Her kids and XH do not know of the A, I am just thinking of ways to break it up fast..however I do not want to pay the consequences for it.
Are there "discreet" ways I could let her XH and kids know about this without WH and OW knowing it was me?
You see WH was thinkig of moving abroad about 6 months ago then the A got deeper and more involved and he changed his mind.
blessing

Please tell me what you think of this situation.
I had to stop by my marital apartment because I needed a shelf and a office chair that is there and I need it for the place I am renting.
A friend of mine and his wife helped me. As we arrived to the place i notice my WH motorcycle parked outside and OW's car. So he was in OW's apartment.
My friends and I took the items and then his wife went to get the truck which was parked further away while the her H (jim) and I carried the furniture to the front yard waiting for her.
My WH heard us talk I am sure. He is friend with Jim and Jim knows the whole story.
SO what WH did was sneak out of the OW place (I saw him with the corner of my eye) and pretended to go down the basement to exit from the garage door, just like in the good old days when the A was secret and he used to rent the basement from OW. SO he was pretending to get out of the basement.
Now I know you are going to tell me not to focus on WH at all but please tell me why--he would decide to leave OW's house right when my friends and I were there in the front yard.
--why would he sneak out of the garage? and not even say hi to Jim, who by the way said "Oh look, there is WH, how embarassing...what now...? Well, Hi WH! TO which WH replied with a gesture but did not talk.
--I remaind indifferent as WH Hi gesture was also aimed towards me.
Is WH doing this in purpose? If so why sneak around like that? Why pretend not to see his friend Jim? and why not wait to leave OW's house 10 min later when we would have all been gone!
please help me!
blessing

bump - help

ugh.... It makes me sick that you go there and see him. I know you are sick as well today..

But why would he act that way? what is he trying to do?
Does he simply do not give a damn about it or is he still sneaking around as if the A is still secret when is not?
I do not know if he was trying to make a statement with our friends by saying: yes, I am seeing her, so what?

Is the apartment still on the market?

Yes.
But please tell me what you think of all this.....why is he still so sneaky?

Why did he do this sneaking around?
And, is he doing this on purpose?
Why did he not say "Hi" to friend Jim.

This is wayward logic.
Which is inherently illogical.

WH logic is that he can still fool some of the people some of the time.
WH logic is that only appearances matter, not the truth.
WH logic is foggy stinkin'-thinkin' , ergo illogical.
WH logic is that if he appears to be innocent, others (Jim) will not think poorly of him.
WH logic is that if he pretends he did not see Jim (thus avoiding the "Hi, how ya doin'?") ....... He appears to be just living life, NOT sneaking around.

In short, he's being a foolish tool.
He cannot run from his fooltoolishness.
He "thinks" ( a term I use loosely in this case) he appears normal and natural.

You REALLY do not want/need this fool back in his present state.

I think WH wanted you or Jim to acknowledge him first.
How dumb is that?

Thank you Pep,
yes, he is in fact trying to act natural, that's pretty much his attitude all the time. He is a master at that. He could be cheating right behind your back but his front will show a normal facade of a man. Just as if nothing is hapenning.
I guess going out when JIm was there was to show he is not doing anything wrong and going out from the basement garage is like saying: I am just picking up something in the basement.

You are right, there is no logic to this. He is activing like a fool, a real fool.
It hurts me still.
blessing

How can he not see who she really is? OK, 15 years younger than he is and big boobs...cute face, works twice a week and left her 9 year old son in full custody of her xH so she can "dedicate" herself to WH. I wonder what kind of tales she spins to him and he of course believes it all!
Is that enought to leave everything....and can this go on for years?!
blessing

I'm assuming you are asking this question out of frustration.

I say this shouting....

STOP TRYING TO MAKE SENSE OUT OF STUPIDITY

Just cut it out.
You're going to drive yourself nutz!

He used to be and probably still is a very intelligent man.
But you are right. Looking at his behaviour, beeing Aware of how he acts is a big wake up call.
My WH is stupid and acts like one 100%
It must serve him well,because he continues to be stupid.
Blessing

Bill Clinton, when he was president, acted like a stupid a.r.s.e.
He's a Rhodes scholar, so that makes him intelligent. Clinton has a high IQ.

Which does not qualify Clinton for a high EQ, emotional intelligence.

There IS a difference. Depending on "What is, is."

What Clinton did makes NO SENSE.

Stop trying to make sense out of what your WH is doing.
Concentrate on YOU.

You are so good Pep, you made me feel better. I forget that intelligent people do stupid things all the time and they believe they will never get caught!
And they keep thinking that they are just fine doing what they are doing because....they deserve to be happy and the h@ll with the rest.
You reminded me of something fundamental WH is stupid, fogged up, surrounded by superficial idiots like him (ge got rid of his family and good friends) and the only thing he has right now is her.
But he is happy.
go figure

blessing

Go look at my newest thread ....

BRAIN MATTER