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Joined: Nov 2010
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I'm the wife of respond2us. Just wanted to tell give a few of my own opinions after reading these posts.
My husband obviously came on here for help. He absolutely knows the damage he's done to our marriage and whether or not it can be repaired is yet to be seen. With that said, I love my husband. If I didn't feel there had been any change in him the last 9 months, I absolutely would have gotten out of the marriage. I am still not convinced by any means that he is "fixed" or this will never happen again, but I feel like he has made progress by leaps and bounds.
As for my own affair, it started as a result of him giving me zero emotional connection because he was giving it to the other woman. Yes, there were many women, but one woman specifically for over a year. I used my other man as a comfort, or retreat from trying to deal with the shock of what I'd found out. It was by no means the right thing to do and I ultimately made the decision to do it. Not to get back at my husband, but only to feel some type of comfort. I have not had any contact with him in about 2 months now and our affair lasted about 7 months total.
My husband is specifically wanting help on our intimacy issues. I am having a VERY hard time dealing with this. I can't seem to get past the visions of him sleeping with some of my very best friends. Not to mention having delt with a very scary STD as a result of his affairs. And for the record, he and I have both been tested negative for anything else, thank God.
I appreciate all the helpful posts.
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,416
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Respond, 4 1/2 years ago I had an A with a fellow teacher. I will NEVER forget the look on DH's face when I confessed to cheating with ONE man (one way too many).
It was wrong for your W to cheat - absolutely wrong. But surely you can comprehend WHY it is hard to believe that you are so upset with her after SIXTEEN different women of your own.
Here's a question....What did YOU do to help your wife recover from your 16 affairs?
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
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Respond2us2, you need to start your own thread. I notified the moderators, but I think I can do it for you...hang on a sec...
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 7,449
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Joined: Oct 2007
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I'm the wife of respond2us. Just wanted to tell give a few of my own opinions after reading these posts.
My husband obviously came on here for help. He absolutely knows the damage he's done to our marriage and whether or not it can be repaired is yet to be seen. With that said, I love my husband. If I didn't feel there had been any change in him the last 9 months, I absolutely would have gotten out of the marriage. I am still not convinced by any means that he is "fixed" or this will never happen again, but I feel like he has made progress by leaps and bounds.
As for my own affair, it started as a result of him giving me zero emotional connection because he was giving it to the other woman. Yes, there were many women, but one woman specifically for over a year. I used my other man as a comfort, or retreat from trying to deal with the shock of what I'd found out. It was by no means the right thing to do and I ultimately made the decision to do it. Not to get back at my husband, but only to feel some type of comfort. I have not had any contact with him in about 2 months now and our affair lasted about 7 months total.
My husband is specifically wanting help on our intimacy issues. I am having a VERY hard time dealing with this. I can't seem to get past the visions of him sleeping with some of my very best friends. Not to mention having delt with a very scary STD as a result of his affairs. And for the record, he and I have both been tested negative for anything else, thank God.
I appreciate all the helpful posts. Welcome to MB! The fact that you are both reading/posting here is such a great start. But it is really important that you start your own thread. Whenever both spouses are posting here, it is recommended that you not post on each other's thread. Again, welcome!
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
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Joined: Jan 2010
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My husband is specifically wanting help on our intimacy issues. Did he read the links I posted, like the Basic Concepts? He can use that information to help with this issue, and we can help you guys do it. But obviously we can't use the Marriage Builders concepts to help if he hasn't read them yet. 
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,583
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R2U,
I notice you overlook or ignored my posts to you.
I am still waiting for a reply to the questions I asked.
Happily married to HerPapaBear
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
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Posts: 12,357 |
I'm not too sure they're still around, SMB.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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