All family and friends know, I did not expose her on facebook yet.

Nah. You did not force the company to do anything with your email, you pointed out the truth and they took action.

(Sounds to me the wayward is trying to guilt a confession out of you.) Scare tatics.
Are you afraid of him?

No, I am not afraid of him, I just do not think he would ever speak to me again if he found out I did it. He was trying to get me to tell him I did it. I think legal action is a long shot in any case. I think he wanted me to confess and then possibly the investigation would stop becasue he could say my crazy wife sent them.

You need to do this post-haste.

Expose her on FB like...yesterday!

Then I would definitely get to them before he has a chance to spin you as a loon.

"Mr. CEO? Yes, this is Mrs. Mason. I just wanted to confirm that you received my email regarding my husband's affair on your company's time. It's very important to me that you have this information, because I want to save my marriage and cannot do that without your support. I'm sure you understand that I love my husband and will do whatever it takes to save my marriage. Do you have any questions regarding the information I gave you?"

Your marriage can survive his temporary anger. It cannot survive an affair.

I agree, it can not survive this affair. After all of this and him going back to her I still have an ounce of hope left.

mason - YOU are not responsible for sabotaging his career. He and he alone did that to HIMSELF when he decided to treat his own workplace like a dating service and wh*rehouse, and decided it was okay to help himself to whatever women he could get while there.

His company will not care about that - not as long as they keep doing their jobs and making money for the company. But if he's been spending company money on this - especially falsifying expense reports to cover for an OW - THEN the company will take action. That's how the CEO of Hewlett-Packard was recently forced to resign.

That is correct, when his boss first found out about it he said I am not happy about it, but keep it professional. And yes, he did not want my husband to leave. Now that it got to the CEO, it is another matter. I remember the firing of the HP CEO, I am not sure if they will find anything, but I hope the stess kills him

Well... have you exposed to friends and OW's family?

That is like instant death to the fantasy of the A.

Just found out that not only is he being investigated so is the OW!

Justice does come after all.......fantasy is going to be filled with anger now.......probably wasn't worth losing your job.......hehe!!!

How did you find this out?

Found out through a friend that talks to my husband.

I am just hoping that this will not bring them closer together to try to support each other through this.

Think about those cop shows you see, where there are two bad guys. The cops separate them and start questioning them. Eventually they rat each other out. I suspect that is what will happen here. Because, really, waywards are selfish people with their own self-interest in mind. Your WH will be primarily concerned with his job, I think.

Typically, after exposure how long until the fog is lifted?
Thinking about telling him if he continues to see her, I am done.
I need to preserve my sanity for the holidays and try to get through them without worrying if he is with her every other weekend he does not have the kids.
Hoping for a big explosion for him at work next week after his interview with the corporate attnys.

mason, the fog lifts after he ends his affair.

My suggestion would be to finish up your exposures. If you haven't exposed to the OW's friends and family, then get that done ASAP.

Then go into Plan B. ARe you familiar with Plan B? Do you have the book Surviving an Affair?

Got it, the affair has not ended and I am familiar with Plan B. It has been 4 months of ambivalence, they are full exposed now, especially with work.

I would suggest going into Plan B real soon. Just before the holidays is a GREAT TIME to go into Plan B because it gives the WS a taste of the single life without his family. Do you have the sample letter from Surviving an Affair? If so, I would write it out and post it so folks can give you feedback.

Before you go into Plan B, I would find someone who can remain completely neutral who will be your intermediary. Her job will be to act as a SPAM filter who will only pass on pertinent information about finances and the children. When you send him the Plan B letter I would attach a visitation schedule so that you won't have anything to discuss. In the letter tell him he can pick the kids up from the driveway and drop them off outside. Under no circumstances should he come in the house. You might want to change the locks in advance so he doesn't barge in.

Additionally, you would want to put something in the letter about him never bringing your children around the OW. They should NEVER be exposed to his filthy affair.

Does he have his paycheck direct deposited to your account? He will be expected to continue to support you and pay the bills.

You will want to get this all worked out before you go into Plan B.