......

atena,

I'm making your lasagne recipe right now. I'll let you know how it turns out.

It was very delicious.

Glad you liked it Sugar!
I know Mel means well. Maybe eye-italian is not her thing but I am sure she makes delicious Texas meats and goodies.

I just came back from my Thanksgiving trip to a major european lively city with a girlfriend.
It has been over a year of separation with WH and he has not shown even one hint of interested in R the M.
At this point, even during my trip, I still had very very sad moments where I missed him tremendously.
The point is....I know you guys are going to tell me I should not want him back the way he is even if he wanted to come back...but the thing is...he does not want to.
Is it possible that a WH can be completely happy being a bachelor in a place the size of a closet, living with very little money (he said thru my IM that he is short on money and I know he must be) and seeing OW daily when she can get away from her brats?
Or is he finally so happy because he could get away from me?
Is there any hope at all with a man like my WH to R the M?
I am sad. Taking meds but still sad.
blessing

"Is it possible that a WH can be completely happy being a bachelor in a place the size of a closet, living with very little money (he said thru my IM that he is short on money and I know he must be) and seeing OW daily when she can get away from her brats?"



It is possible that your WH has his head so far up his pitoonga that it will take him a while to pull it out....

atena,

I had a little square of the now cold lasagne just now, and it was STILL delicious.

The answer to all your questions is "yes"; all are possible. However, nobody can tell you how things will turn out and whether H will go home to you or not. All you can do is protect yourself from the affair.

Are you applying for jobs in the US yet, or taking other concrete steps to leave that job?

You know I love you Italians!

And you also know what I think about you living right over the OW and seeing your WS at work all the time. So I won't knock myself out saying it again!!

but of course you are not concentrating on his stupidity right now....RIGHT?

I am not sure he is stupid. I just think he made a choice and he must be convinced of it if he never looked back.
OW plays a big role, but for the way he is his life will have many OW's. The catch is that he believes this one is the one for whom is worth leaving the family while in the past even if he cheated he did not think OW were worth as much as his family....
blessing

I am not saying that he is stupid in so much as that his actions are stupid...that cannot be disputed...he left a wonderful person for a *edit* that sleeps with a married man. He is "stupid" if he thinks "that" was worth leaving you for. So maybe he is stupid after all....NO OW is worth leaving a caring, loving family for, that is for sure.

I am looking for jobs but so far all I hear is that it is too early to apply for education related position, or that I do not have the accreditations needed. I spoke to several people who moved to the states last year and they all regretted it saying their jobs are at stake. Again, I am talking education field, and a specific one too.
I still firmly believe moving is the solution, i do not see any other way I am going to get WH out of my head otherwise. It has been over a year in this plan B and I still miss him, think about him and hope he comes back.
It is a clear sign I don't have it all together either if I want someone like him back in my life.
The house we have in common is not selling. I just want out of this situation and in this country where I am at it seems everything is keeping me trapped here....
blessing

Atena, when you get the heck away from him it will help you...a true plan B will help you get it together..

So for right now, is there anyway you can just move somewhere else until the job in the states works out?...I mean any distance will help you at this point. A different atmosphere or sumthin?

I still want my H back after all this time too, atena...I dont know if that feeling will ever go completely away...but I dont think about it nearly as much now, actually its usu when I am on this website....but it doesnt crush me like it used to...you need to get away. My H is in my head still but I can brush it away much easier now...time helps too...

Like Pep said to me...maybe its just gonna take us more time...I have my bad moments still...but very few of them.

I tried to be away from the house for a year and I do not have money left to pay both rent and mortgage. I have a $4,000 debt I have to pay for my education and then other expenses. I can't move till I sell.
Accommodation here is not cheap. It is a big city, unless you want to be in some bad area of town you need to pay.
I just feel like the first days he left...still totally into him and the A. Some days are better but I realize that till I move and detach completely my life is going to be hard...like a daily nightmare
blessing

atena, Im sorry its so tough for you right now...I know the pain.

I so sorry you are feeling so much pain. I am new here and have been following your post since you are in Plan B. I am in Plan A needing to go to B. I will as soon as my ducks are all in a nice row. Good luck finding a job and moving.

Karto, Still and all,
thank you. I have good news, I found a place where to spend the holidays when my son is here from the states. I will have the place for almost 3 weeks as "Marla" will be visiting her parents in the states for xmas and will leave her place to me. This will only cost me 75 dollars for expenses which is quite reasonable.
This will prevent my son from having to see OW on a daily basis. Even if his dad will introduce him to her he at least does not have to be embarassed about running into her in my presence.
I think this is a good temp solution. I know is just a bandaid and does not help much but I think it will make my son more comfortable and me less nervous about the whole thing.
blessing

Buone Feste!

Thank you!!!

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