I missed this, mason. Why have you not exposed this A to OW's parents? They very likely will be extremely disapproving of their daughter consorting with a married father.

They will very likely be powerful allies in your fight to end the A.

Thank you for the changes in the letter. The OW parents know from her she lives with them. I am sure she is thrilled that my husband has asked for a divorce from me. I will send the letter, change the locks and I am going VERY dark.

You don't know for a fact what it is her parents know, and you won't know until you talk to them yourself. For all you know, she's told them she's dating a man whose wife is running around on him, and he's in the process of divorcing her because of it. She may have told them that WH has been separated for years but his psychotic wife won't let go. Or that there are no kids.

Mason, parents with even a shred of integrity have a problem with kids being exposed to an affair. They won't want their daughter or son involved in that.

Call them and talk to them yourself so they have the true story.

Again, the affair has NOT been exposed to her parents. I seriously doubt she pranced in and announced to her parents: "hey, I am having an affair with a married man from work! He has a wife and 2 little children and he is abandoning them so we engage in barnyard sex. He is a wonderful man!!"

Rather, she told them a lie about how "his mean, CRAZY wife kicked him out for her affair several years ago and filed for divorce. We are just waiting for the divorce to be final."

The best thing you can do for your marriage is to go personally to her home with your children, tell the parents about the affair and ask them to use their influence with their skanky daughter to persuade her to leave this married man alone. It would have an even greater impact if your parents and/or MIL went with you.

Mason, you need to go see them and make sure they know. i know that scares the crap out of you, but it has to be done.

Exposure killed my wifes affair when other people in the family and OMs fiance came down on them like a ton of bricks.

You have to do this. Before you go dark.

I did not think of it that way, she lives in Ohio. I can find her on Facebook. I will do that, I have nothing to lose at this point.

I know I have seen samples of what to say, can somone post so I mak sure I get my point across.

I would do an extensive facebook exposure on her and then follow up and speak to her parents. [call them if they don't call you] Copy and paste all her facebook friends into a WORD doc first. Then send her contacts a private message. Start off with her parents and then work through her relatives and then her married friends. Time them at least 60 seconds apart so you don't get shut down for flooding. Be sure and put a family photo on your facebook page so they all see a photo of you and your H and child.

Dear friend of Skankyhola,

It is with great regret that I send this letter but I believe all of her friends should be aware that Skanky is having an affair with my husband, Joe. We have been married for 5 years and have 3 heartbroken children. They have been having this affair since October according to the evidence.

I would be happy to provide the evidence to anyone who asks.

I would ask that you use your influence with Skanky to persuade her to leave my husband alone. You should also watch your own husbands around her because she is no friend to marriage.

I would appreciate it if someone would notify her parents and ask them to call me at xxx-www-xxxx.

Thank you, BW

Hi again,
Mason, I think if you follow the steps of the vets here, MelodyLane and Maritalbliss are guiding you with ........ and if you follow the steps you will have done all you can to save your marriage....
What you have to do is stop worrying about what your husband is doing or why he is saying what he is saying, he is in the middle of affair fog and won't say anything you will want him to say.
Your first job is to expose the affair with everyone then you send the Plan B letter and then you let your affair fog husband feel the brunt of his decisions and let him wake up from the decisions he has made, you stay strong in the meantime.........
When he is ready to not lose everything that he has know in his life you can then work on your relationship.........Until that realization for him takes place all you can do is follow the plan and wait........and improve yourself and be a great mom and person...............

Thank you, I thought I would feel better today and I do not. I need to make sure I get daycare paid for then I will expose to her family and friends. This nightmare will never end.

mason, your h cannot legally stop supporting you. You can't be in a position where you have to appease him in order to be supported. If there is any hint he will stop support you should file for divorce.

I am going to an attorney on Wednesday and getting our custody ageement and payments (mortgage and daycare) written up so there is no gray area. I am prepared to protect myself and the boys. I am hoping this exposure works, andsh finally dumps him, it is my last chance. I feel so desparate. I have nothing to lose by exposing to everyone at this point. I will follow the plan. He is a cold hearted person.

That's fine, mason, you absolutely should seek legal advice so that you know what your rights and options are.

But you should also get in your car and take a little drive to see OW's parents. If you do that now, you may not need the help of your attorney.

The OW parents live in Ohio, I live in NJ. I am going to send an email through facebook. Thanks for your advice,I am taking it all with nothing to lose.

Call them when you know she's at work.

She works at home. So maybe tough to do. I will try to look up the number and block my number. I know I have to do everything I can to shake him out of his fog and make him see that there will be consequences for his choices. There have been very little. I almost feel like he has a sense of entitlement. He shows no feelings at all, I do not think he has any feelings anymore.

Ok, I just sent the exposure letter to I think the OW mom or step mom. I was hesitating, and then I thought WHY??? I have nothing to lose, my husband already told me he does not love me and wants a divorce. Nothing left to lose!!!

Mason,

I have been following your thread, not posted before but see an amazing woman, hang on in there and look after yourself.

Sending love and light to you

Ok now I am scared, my husband just called three time and the OW took her facebook page down already. I know I have nothing to lose. I am angry let him be angry and realize that he is a cheater who walked out on his family.

Mason, take a deep breath for me, please? It's going to be okay.

There's no reason to be scared, you just got confirmation that he's still in contact with her, and you're exposure arrow hit the bullseye! Good Job!

Think about it if her family "knew all about it", then she wouldn't be getting all upset, would she?!