|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490 |
The previous marriage no longer exists making the new marriage valid. The new M sure existed when the "new marriage" (ie, affairage) happened though...I bet the BW would sure argue that point. The old marriage desisted ONLY by the law of the land ~ NOT in God's eyes. God did not sanction the ending of that M, IMO.
Me,BW - 42; FWH-46 4 kids D-Day #s1 and 2~May 2006 D-Day #3~Feb.27, 2007 (we'd been in a FR) Plan B~ March 3 ~ April 6, 2007 In Recovery and things are improving every day. MB rocks. 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,416
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,416 |
I will make sure not to use bitter again. I know it is a trigger, just as there are things that trigger me. I also know NC sincerely wants help in her situation, and I don't want to detract from that.
And I agree, maritalbliss. Jesus sees clearly as the Father sees. I look forward to the day we will (I John 3:2)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240 |
NC, I hope you will not lose your nerve about exposing your sin to your children.
Do your children know about the A that your WH committed against you?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780 |
The previous marriage no longer exists making the new marriage valid. The new M sure existed when the "new marriage" (ie, affairage) happened though...I bet the BW would sure argue that point. I don't understand what you are saying. The new M existed when the new marriage happened? The old marriage desisted ONLY by the law of the land ~ NOT in God's eyes. God did not sanction the ending of that M, IMO. I beg to differ here. Adultery is grounds for ending a marriage in God's eyes according to scripture.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
In Gods eyes...NC and exWH marriage is not valid....They are the adulterers...
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780 |
In Gods eyes...NC and exWH marriage is not valid....They are the adulterers... I do not believe that is back up by scripture. Yes, they WERE adulterers when they were sleeping with each other when he was married to someone else. THAT marriage is over. His first wife divorced him (with scriptural grounds). That marriage no longer exists and so therefore the WH and NC (OW) are no longer committing adultery. Do they still have to answer to God for their sin of previous adultery? Yes. But that is a seperate issue from their marriage being valid now. David had Bathsheba's husband killed so he could be with her....does that mean his marriage to her was invalid?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
The wayward cannot remarry...Bathshebas husband was dead...
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
In Gods eyes you cannot be a wayward then marry your AP...I mean you can legally, but that Affairage will not be valid, in Gods eyes....I mean would that really make any sense....I, at this point, dont even really believe that I can remarry....I absolutely believe that the AP's cannot....
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
The way I interpret the Bible....The BW and WH are bound together forever...and if there is infidelity then the betrayed can divorce the Wayward and not have to act as a spouse should, but cannot remarry....Both are not supposed to remarry. That is just my interpretation....Only death can be a reason to remarry.
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780 |
That is just not backed up by scripture. If the marriage is over it is over. Whether by death or adultery the marriage is over.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
Well that is the way you interpret the scriptures....I dont see them that way...
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490 |
Originally Posted By: MarriedForever
Quote:
The previous marriage no longer exists making the new marriage valid.
The new M sure existed when the "new marriage" (ie, affairage) happened though...I bet the BW would sure argue that point.
I don't understand what you are saying. The new M existed when the new marriage happened? I don't understand your question. Originally Posted By: MarriedForever
The old marriage desisted ONLY by the law of the land ~ NOT in God's eyes. God did not sanction the ending of that M, IMO.
I beg to differ here. Adultery is grounds for ending a marriage in God's eyes according to scripture. Right ~ adultery is GROUNDS for D but it is not MANDATORY to D if adultery is involved. So what if the BW did not want the D...what if she dragged her feet and begged her WH to change his mind, right up until the last minute. Would God sanction this D then? I believe not. I believe that God HATES D, no matter what, even when there are "grounds" for D. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.� (Matt 19:6) God DID join them together and no one has the "right" to un-join them, much less an affair partner. IMHO that is.
Me,BW - 42; FWH-46 4 kids D-Day #s1 and 2~May 2006 D-Day #3~Feb.27, 2007 (we'd been in a FR) Plan B~ March 3 ~ April 6, 2007 In Recovery and things are improving every day. MB rocks.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490 |
That is just not backed up by scripture. If the marriage is over it is over. Whether by death or adultery the marriage is over. Not according to this website/biblical scholar: http://www.familyradio.com/graphical/literature/joined/joined_06.htmlThis is the "beauty" of scripture, LOL...it can be interpreted so many different ways.
Me,BW - 42; FWH-46 4 kids D-Day #s1 and 2~May 2006 D-Day #3~Feb.27, 2007 (we'd been in a FR) Plan B~ March 3 ~ April 6, 2007 In Recovery and things are improving every day. MB rocks.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490 |
Where does the bible say that a M is "over" if there is adultery?
Me,BW - 42; FWH-46 4 kids D-Day #s1 and 2~May 2006 D-Day #3~Feb.27, 2007 (we'd been in a FR) Plan B~ March 3 ~ April 6, 2007 In Recovery and things are improving every day. MB rocks.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
In pauls letter to the Corinthian it states...
10 But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband 11 (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife. 12 But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. 15 Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
My interpretation is that if the BH or BW does leave the M....They cannot remarry. JMHO
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780 |
The wayward cannot remarry...Bathshebas husband was dead... My question was 'Was David's marriage to Bathesheba invalid since their relationship began as adultery?' Yes, her BH was dead...because her adultery partner had him killed!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7 |
I seriously doubt that the theological questions being debated in this thread can come to a final resolution here in this thread. Some of this has been debated for centuries by hundreds of scholars.
Best to try to understand opposing points of view and be as well informed as possible as to the justification for those views, IMO.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,780 |
In pauls letter to the Corinthian it states...
10 But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband 11 (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife. 12 But to the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy. 15 Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
My interpretation is that if the BH or BW does leave the M....They cannot remarry. JMHO Yes, but the above passage is not discussing adultery. In other passages in the Bible it offers that exception. Adultery CAN sever the bond of marriage. Breaks the vow.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,617 |
Where does the bible say that a M is "over" if there is adultery? Exactly...It doesnt...It does say the the BS can divorce...Only in the case of adultery...but never remarry...I believe that the divorce is only if the wayward is refusing to end the affair...this way the betrayed does not have to keep acting as the spouse to a continuing adulterer....not so they can remarry.
BW me-41 WH -39 DS - 9 married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered DDay aug 2007 found MB dec 2007 Moved out april 2008 still seeing OW Plan B Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,490 |
In other passages in the Bible it offers that exception. Adultery CAN sever the bond of marriage. Breaks the vow. Scripture please? Or is this an interpretation?
Me,BW - 42; FWH-46 4 kids D-Day #s1 and 2~May 2006 D-Day #3~Feb.27, 2007 (we'd been in a FR) Plan B~ March 3 ~ April 6, 2007 In Recovery and things are improving every day. MB rocks.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
0 members (),
485
guests, and
44
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|
