Thank you.

Thank you.

Scotty, you are an inspiration to many people who are in turmoil and those of us who who have supported you. Your dedication to your children is so apparent in all you say and do. I am so happy to consider you a friend.

Thank You.

Oh, I popped on on the right day!

Scotty, you are amazing. You have the strength to do what I don't know if I could ever do. You were awesome when I was dealing with my stuff this time last year, always reminding me to stay dark(!), and, well, you are just an inspiration for everyone, old and new.

Scotty,

I salute you. You are a helluva mom, beautiful woman, and inspiration to so many around here. God has amazing things in store for you, my friend.

Hugs and much love to you.

And remember, when somebody compliments you my friend (and you'll get tons of it in the future face to face), you smile and say "thanks".

I'm one who has a huge problem with getting them too. Learning the "T" word was big for me! lol!

Scotty,
I would have been totally lost without your constant guidance these past few months. You've been both an advisor and a friend and I value you for both. I'm blessed to have you in my life. You have also prevented me from being a HaG! Kudos and hugs to you!
H&G

Scotty, you are the bees knees! You are a tremendous mother and an awesome woman. I am priveledged and honored to call you my friend. You have a heart of gold that is under-appreciated by those around you, yet you don't let that deter you from being who you are. You do inspire and motivate and have helped so many others around you, not the least of which me. God bless and rock on!!

Thank You.

Thank You.

Thank You.


And leave it to you to have me laffing through tears. Thank You, I needed that.

The bees knees? How old are you? HAHAHAHA

Sorry, I forgot........ Thank You.

Neak, it is funny how things like this happen when you need them most. I have been struggling for the past week and a half. I don't know why. I have been reevaluating everything and still thinking about what MF said to me months ago. I have had a lot to think about. This personal recovery gig sucks azz sometimes, but it is all a process to get me out better and healed on the other side.

Thank you to you all for being here. I couldn't have done it without all of you. You have been an answer to a prayer in a way I never knew possible. I am HONOURED to be a member of such an amazing community. You all ROCK.

Thank you.

--------------WARNING---------------------

Total RANT here.

So, tonight is the second in the new norm of DSx2 spending the night with Bampot and WF. It will occur every other Saturday. Anyways, I am trying to get okay with it. I asked DS10 to call me at 8pm, to say "g'night." He called at 8. I was out with my parents. DS10 says, "I tried calling the house first but there was no answer." I said, "Yes, cuz I am out." Then I asked if he had a good day. He said, "Yup." He told me how he watched Fast and Furious. I told him that there were now 5 movies in the series and he needed to catch up. Then I asked him if they had gone outside today, since it was a very nice day out. He said, "We went to orig IMs house." I asked, "With OW?" He said, "Yes." It was like a punch in the gut. I tried to not let my annoyance show, since I wasn't annoyed with DS10, and I tried to change the subject before letting him go. I don't know that I pulled it off though.

I was MADDDDDDD. This is another time when Bampot is lucky that I don't talk to him. I felt the AO rising inside me. I even wanted to call my original IMs and ask them why they would let HER in their house. I was sooooo ANGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

Then, I started to think about this the right way. It's just like I told Mehr last week, the APs need to make their A okay. They need to try to reintegrate into the "norm." This is so they can prove that they did nothing wrong. Also, I find it funny that Bampot would reach out to these friends first. He didn't even "introduce" OW to his mother yet. It has taken him 16.5 months to start reintegrating his new life into his old, or at least trying. It could be for a multitude of reasons, none of which would make any sense to any normal thinking human being.

"They" are going to be moving into a house together at the end of May. "They" are making their life "spectacular." Glad I am not that closely involved in it all. Although, it is still too close for me. I can't ask my children not to tell me what happens at all. I jut need to learn how NOT to react to it right away.

My mom was really mad at my orig IMs. I told her that she did the same thing when she was in her A. She never sees the connections and I think it is funny. Fog is still thick with that one.

On another note, still keeping my fingers crossed about that promotion. I think I can, I think I can.

I am going to spend some time reading. It's a good stress reliever and helps me.

All together now: "Wayturds suck what?"

Sorry for the visit to the IMs, Scotty. I'm mad at them, too. I mean, seriously! I hope they looked askance at WF. Very askance.

As always, you're an inspiration, Scotty, no matter what side of the infidelity equation folks here find themselves on.

Thank you MrsV.

I was more angry with the orig IMs than anything else. I know wayturds suck azz, so no surprise there. The boys and I were invited to a reunion in Aug. I wrote to the IMs and asked if they had told Bampot, so I could make my decision about going. That was the only outward reaction that the orig IMs have seen about this. They don't even know that I know.

After posting about it, I actually started to feel a bit better.

Bampot and I didn't have many friends. There weren't many people we interacted with, and most not even on a monthly basis.

I just felt so defeated today. There is NO ONE fighting this stinking affair but ME. I sometimes feel the weight of it on my shoulders. ARGH. I eventually pull myself together because it's what survivors do, and by golly, if nothing else, I WILL SURVIVE THIS. My original Google search, which led me here was, "How to survive your husband's affair." That was the answer to my prayer. This place.


On another note, again, because that's how my scattered brain seems to be working tonight, I accepted compliments today. I said, "Thank you." I even smiled a couple of times.

As defeating as this can be, the fight you are giving is making you a better, stronger Scotty. "A Scotty forged in the fires of betrayal..." (<-- that's my sleep-deprived movie announcer voiceover)



These are very good things! Thanks for reporting on that - I am happy for you!

This was before the phone call from DS10, so I was trying my bestest.

I still didn't feel comfortable accepting the compliments, but it was progress. Moving forward, even if it is baby steps some days.

Thanx MrV, you ROCK.

So this is the thread I need to read huh.... I'll work on this....