Outside of confronting om what about ny 10 year old daughter who has been told. Is it ok to send her with ww to ensure no contact. She has been told mommy has a secret phone she uses.

For example, She my have to go to the post office and I worry if she goes alone.....

Should I tell my daught why I want her to go with mommy?

Been reading survivng an affair again.....trying to only read the chapters pertaining to where we are at because I get ahead of myself sometimes.

It is probably the most important book I have ever purchased. What a blessing.

I keep it in my nightstand for occasional night-time reading. Still.

Maybe so, unless somebody gave you a FREE Bible, for that is THE most important book to ever read.

Is it a sin to steal a Gideon Bible from a hotel room? Never did it...always wondered, though...

I think if you needed to read it that much, He'd probably say ok.



After all, don't the Gideons give them to the hotels?

I've always believed that would be a lesser sin when a soul gets up there

by the way I am a religious person.

she has been behaving, she got to say her goodbye to om her way, and now says she will be good.

I don't believe her and think its just a matter of time, would be great if she proved me wrong though.

I think plan b is the best chance of success based on observing her and knowing how she is. Unfortunately getting to plan b I know will involve a lawyer. I guess how long I go with plan a depends on her but 6 months is my max right now.

I was just rading chapter 4 in survivng an affair, "How do affairs usually end" and realizing that is likely what I am in for even though I am trying to get her to listen to chapter 5 how affairs should end.

A bit of a wakeup call, but this is a pretty bad affair. I think she is close to the sould mate level on the scale.

I was just realizing I need to find the phone and takeaway her cash stash. Make her debit or credit everything so there is a record. I need to not trust her

What I wanted to ask the vets is now that I finished my exposures how much do I talk about the affair and what's going on? Only with my confidants? No more publicity?

Also my 10 year old, many people disagree with her being told. How much do I talk with her about it? She was under the impression it was done and mommy is staying for sure. I told her its still up in the air and that we don't know what mommy will do. Her mom said she didn't like being babysat by her when I sent her to the poast office with mom. I told her mom still hasn't given up her secret cell phone. Should I stop discussing it with her?

I figure its only a few days till ww can't take it and ends up contacting him. I sent him another email telling him I am planning to fight for the marriage and am going to know if ww lies to me about it and that I may even show up if they meet. I saw in chapter 4 that what she did the other day getting away to clear her thoughts was textbook.

Hi blaze. I would continue to talk to your 10 year old and anyone else about the affair. Let your DD know how the affair affects you and encourage her to bring it up to her mother. She needs to know that her mother is willing to give up her family over a big fat loser.

When you email that loser, tell him that there is no future in his affair because he will be eternally hated by your children and the inlaws.

Did you expose to loserboys family and friends on facebook? OM don't like trouble so you should be doing everything in your power to run that coward off.

Thank you, I did email him and told him I was going to fight for this marriage and that I will know if Misty lies to me and that if they do meet again I just may show up.

I will continue talking to my daughter also.

He replied that he hoped my God blesses me with the chance to confront him.

I replied asking him why, what he was going to do.

He replied he was going to go to bed and said see ya stud.

I replied Thats what I thought, all bark no bite and said he was a [censored] cat

Should I be egging him on so much....that and the warning to not make him angry I wonder if they constitute a threat that could be a parole violation. How would I go about contacting his parole officer?

I would find out who his parole officer is and send a certified letter to him and the supervising judge in the case. Do some legwork and see if you find out who that would be.

I stiil am asking for her secret cell phone and she is still refusing to give it up....any advice on what to do. Should I search for it and find it myselfy?

Continue asking for it.

Anything to say that might convice her to give it up?

Carry on looking , never stop.

What about this.....she is pulling this thing that she is not sure. She is not trying to fix our marriage right now. Do I carry on with plan a or do I oush her to make a choice to work thing out or go?

You carry on with plan A until you cannot sustain it anymore and you actively work to get the OM out of her life

So that means accepting her indecision and unwillingness to choose to work on the marriage and not making a demand on the phone in order to avoid doing anything to make her unhappy and doing whatever she will allow to meet her needs right?

Since we are both off work right now what about if she insists on dumping the kids on me to see him, I obviouslly can't make her not go, but if figure I will verbally put my foot down and not allow it. If she does that should I try to follow her or go to where she is to confront them?

I would NOT bring the kids, but you could drive over there, video her pulling into his driveway or where he lives, and smile and wave at her.

Or just follow over there and then video her car at his house. Its good in case this goes in any legal route at all, plus it's evidence she IS having an affair.

Tell her you showed the 10 year old. The 10 yo needs to know why mommy is not being a mommy right now.

Definitely take away her cash. I'd take away ALL cash monies now. Change the pin code to the bank so she can't get cash. However, you can get cash at the grocery store by opting for the "cash back" at the end of a transaction. Hell I'd take away her credit cards if you are primary on them. I'd take away all monies. Tell her you're not financing this affair! Let the skanky posom prisoner finance it!

I'd also tell the 10 year old that the man is a dangerous ex con. I would also let ww know that YOU ARE NOT ALLOWING your children around OM because of his dangerous past and that she can bet her money on it. What's left of "her" money since you aren't going to be giving her any more!

Imho, after a good plan A, if she is totally disrespecting you AND the marriage, she needs to be out of the house. Children STAY WITH YOU, the wayward must go.

I am thinkink plan b is coming really soon.

I don't want it to be ugly. She has been being honest and the honesty is revealing the ugliness and hopelessness of plan A.

I need to preapre more for plan B....I want to tell her ill take her back after plan B, that's its not over but I know that's wrong. I need help drafting a plan b letter or something. I am so confused and hurt right now.

I fell like I can't take her car and money away....that will make this ugly.

Ijust fell like scew this....she is fraking stupid, she will miss what she's got, itt wont work out, and she will come crawling back to me.

I need a marriage counselor....how do I get one of dr harleys associates on the phone?