Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
#2500077 04/20/11 09:45 AM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
K
Member
Member
K Offline
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
Y'all, I have an internet acquaintance who is having problems in her marriage.

Based on what she has said, I'm 95% sure that her husband is having an affair. He has said he no longer loves her, is no longer attracted to her, sleeps on the sofa, and has re-written marital history saying that their marriage has always been bad and they should never have married. She was shocked because until recently she would have said they had a good marriage. You all know the drill.

Anyway, she is a very busy mom of two, homeschooling the children during the day and working full-time in the evenings. I've convinced her that she needs to snoop to find out what is going on, but she feels that she does not have time to read everything on this website to figure out what to do next.

I am hoping that she will join the forum, but she has not so far.

Could y'all point me to the very best, most concise articles and/or threads about snooping on a WS? Something that will help her figure out why it's okay and how to do it?


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
J
Member
Member
J Offline
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
It's okay to snoop in this kind of situation, this is her life, she should install at key logger on the comp, get a voice activated recorder in his car, check the phone records see if there is a number he talks to a lot........hire a PI........get her info and then have her come here to put a good plan together if she indeed wants to save her marriage.........
Tell her to stay quiet for now...........she needs to get proof first.........


BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
K
Member
Member
K Offline
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
Originally Posted by jessitaylor
It's okay to snoop in this kind of situation, this is her life, she should install at key logger on the comp, get a voice activated recorder in his car, check the phone records see if there is a number he talks to a lot........hire a PI........get her info and then have her come here to put a good plan together if she indeed wants to save her marriage.........
Tell her to stay quiet for now...........she needs to get proof first.........

Thanks. I told her to get a keylogger and gave her the link to the thread about them over in Operation Investigate. I told her to check cell phone records. And, I told her to get a VAR and that some people get a second cell phone for the affair. I also emphasized the need to keep quiet for now.

She said that she would have some time today to start checking things out.


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
J
Member
Member
J Offline
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
just be there for her, this will be a difficult time as we all know........
just listen and try to get her to stick to a plan...........


BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 539 guests, and 78 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Looking4change, louischan, elongrimer, finnbentley, implementsheep
72,047 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Three Times A Charm
by still seeking - 08/09/25 01:31 PM
How important is it to get the whole story?
by still seeking - 07/24/25 01:29 AM
Annulment reconsideration help
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:05 PM
Help: I Don't Like Being Around My Wife
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:01 PM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,625
Posts2,323,525
Members72,047
Most Online8,273
Yesterday at 04:20 AM
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0